Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

These be our very C's & our U's 'N our T's proudly JSing their way to poetic BFPs in #49.Together we Shall take off our robes (to shag),put on our crowns (to copulate);we have/immortal longings in us!

999 replies

Augusthomotherium · 10/06/2015 19:57

Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)

  1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
  2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
  3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
  4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.
  5. Thou shalt not be offended by the word vagina.

JSing lingo


ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others. Also known as 'the witch', 'bitch witch' and 'that one with the red shiny convertible'

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit), or PIATLH (Tea light holder), PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in! PONF = Pee on Nigel Farage (Self explanatory, who wouldn't?)

ROC = Receptacle of Choice - what one chooses to use for the task of POAS. Optional decorations include photographs of controversial political leaders.

JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet or jizz in the eye. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.

Shagging like Something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession. Warning - this may happen to you if you start trying to POAS at 5dpo. PUT. THE. PISSY. STICK. DOWN. IT'S TOO EARLY!

Contraband (or Cuntraband) = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

SOTM = Shagger of the Month. Awarded with varying regularity to those viroids who go above and beyond EOD shagging in pursuit of that BFP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture. AKA Schroedingering!
TWPU - Two Week Piss Up!

Keeping your gingers = fingers crossed, yet another autocorrect development! Shortened to 'gx'

Doing A Lemon = Testing WAAAAAAAY to early!

Miroid - The male compadre of a viroid

Cat - Compulsory

Skittletits - Killer molten painful tits and nipples

Ghost jizz/goat jazz - When the amazing foof sucks up all the jizz - achieved when coming at the same time/nearly the same time.

The link to Part 47 is HERE

The current Grads Fred is HERE

The current Mumming Fred is HERE

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is HERE

The Fred about 'how wooode' our Fred is darlings can be found HERE and HERE

Stats sheet is HERE

The JustGiving page to donate in memory of TinyChat is HERE

We are the dark side of MN... Welcome!
OP posts:
Thread gallery
31
CountryGal4 · 12/06/2015 22:21

And yes more than a c

honeysucklejasmine · 12/06/2015 22:24

Yes Lil, I need you to come see me!

Look at the pinned post on Facebook, tells you who everyone is and is a good place to introduce yourself.

lildottie · 12/06/2015 22:31

I've updated and alphabetised the pinned post because i'm sad and it was annoying me that the grads one was alphabetised and ours wasnt but need to update grads status on some i think.

We need more people of facebook! there are more grads on there than jsers!

justtheonethen · 12/06/2015 22:55

Ah of course it does! Can you tell I don't use fb much!
Ha ha. You flatterer, it's just a good photo. I think you look v glam and elegant! I'm impressed with the hotness of the viroids! Lucky miroids!

justtheonethen · 12/06/2015 22:59

Ooh off to stalk work out who everyone is. Yes country that is my pussy

5hell · 12/06/2015 23:01

fuck anonymity.... ;)

honeysucklejasmine · 12/06/2015 23:03

Yay! Might use Facebook now as there are actually some undergrads on it!

CountryGal4 · 12/06/2015 23:04

Lovely pussy Grin

justtheonethen · 12/06/2015 23:05

Actually the most recent pussy isn't mine! Mines the big white bastard!

justtheonethen · 12/06/2015 23:06

I'm not exciting enough to care about anonymity!

CountryGal4 · 12/06/2015 23:07

You're pussys the one that looks like it has a giant willy haha

CountryGal4 · 12/06/2015 23:08

Fucking phone ruining my grammar. I promise I'm not a dullard

justtheonethen · 12/06/2015 23:13

Thought you lot would like that!

justtheonethen · 12/06/2015 23:45

Lovely cats viroids! so pleased I now have a cat photo outlet

ColdFeetWarmHeart · 12/06/2015 23:57

Haha glad all you viroids are having an exciting Friday night!!!

Dh is snoring next to me. He asked if I'd poas lately, promised a shag tomorrow morning, then fell asleep!!
I should really go to sleep. We're off to a spa tomorrow (wwedding anniversary weekend). Debating whether or not to watch last episode of anzac girls before turning in......hhhmmmm

CountryGal4 · 12/06/2015 23:59

Can't sleep

lildottie · 13/06/2015 00:02

I'm still in front of the TV. about to head up the wooden hills though so night night viroids

justtheonethen · 13/06/2015 00:11

Happy anniversary cold!

Can't sleep either. Watching call the midwife and exploring ff. great app but not sure I want to pay for VIP after free trial, but prob will!

CountryGal4 · 13/06/2015 00:26

Am reading and listening to dh snore Hmm

SockQueen · 13/06/2015 00:29

I have been watching Call the Midwife too just Grin I really shouldn't though as it makes me cry a fair bit.

Contemplating trying to entice DH away from his computer game for a shag, or just going to bed...

Illiria · 13/06/2015 02:14

Thanks Thursday - though I think I had ov pains today and then some spotting again so I have no idea what is going on. Hoping it will stop so we can dtd.

Lil - my poor DH got pulled over by the cops as he was driving to deliver his sa sample. He had gotten lost and was trying to get start the directions on his phone and they pulled him over. Think they pitied him when he explained and only gave him an off the record verbal warning.

ChatEnOeuf · 13/06/2015 07:16

Ha, no he called in at the local pizza place on the way home...that would be a long way to go for pizza -I don't know if Dutch pizzas are that good??

Happy anniversary Cold, enjoy the spa!

MyBlackCat · 13/06/2015 08:08

Wow you lot were chatty last night Smile I'm too scared to join Facebook group although now v tempted if it's about sharing cat photos!

I was out last night but drove Cos I am a saddo cos I want to do Parkrun this morning but it's pissing with rain, feel I have to go so that I can justify not drinking last night! It's going to be a wet one Wink

Fivemonkeysjumpingonthebed · 13/06/2015 08:21

Morning viroids. How you doing today Feathered?

WouldRatherHaveWine · 13/06/2015 08:52

Morning lovelies. I'll bite, how do I get on this Facebook group?

Swipe left for the next trending thread