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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

These be our very C's & our U's 'N our T's proudly JSing their way to poetic BFPs in #49.Together we Shall take off our robes (to shag),put on our crowns (to copulate);we have/immortal longings in us!

999 replies

Augusthomotherium · 10/06/2015 19:57

Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)

  1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
  2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
  3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
  4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.
  5. Thou shalt not be offended by the word vagina.

JSing lingo


ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others. Also known as 'the witch', 'bitch witch' and 'that one with the red shiny convertible'

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit), or PIATLH (Tea light holder), PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in! PONF = Pee on Nigel Farage (Self explanatory, who wouldn't?)

ROC = Receptacle of Choice - what one chooses to use for the task of POAS. Optional decorations include photographs of controversial political leaders.

JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet or jizz in the eye. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.

Shagging like Something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession. Warning - this may happen to you if you start trying to POAS at 5dpo. PUT. THE. PISSY. STICK. DOWN. IT'S TOO EARLY!

Contraband (or Cuntraband) = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

SOTM = Shagger of the Month. Awarded with varying regularity to those viroids who go above and beyond EOD shagging in pursuit of that BFP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture. AKA Schroedingering!
TWPU - Two Week Piss Up!

Keeping your gingers = fingers crossed, yet another autocorrect development! Shortened to 'gx'

Doing A Lemon = Testing WAAAAAAAY to early!

Miroid - The male compadre of a viroid

Cat - Compulsory

Skittletits - Killer molten painful tits and nipples

Ghost jizz/goat jazz - When the amazing foof sucks up all the jizz - achieved when coming at the same time/nearly the same time.

The link to Part 47 is HERE

The current Grads Fred is HERE

The current Mumming Fred is HERE

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is HERE

The Fred about 'how wooode' our Fred is darlings can be found HERE and HERE

Stats sheet is HERE

The JustGiving page to donate in memory of TinyChat is HERE

We are the dark side of MN... Welcome!
OP posts:
Thread gallery
31
honeysucklejasmine · 22/06/2015 21:51

Gx Sock! You'll do great! Grin

justtheonethen · 22/06/2015 21:51

Old luck for interview sock!

CountryGal4 · 22/06/2015 21:54

What a fucking waste

sock you will rock the viva!

lildottie · 22/06/2015 22:09

good luck sock!

justtheonethen · 22/06/2015 22:09

Oh dear country Sad

CountryGal4 · 22/06/2015 22:11

Yep Sad

honeysucklejasmine · 22/06/2015 22:25

Gosh, what's going on with the miroids?? Angry

justtheonethen · 22/06/2015 22:29

Useless feckers

SockQueen · 22/06/2015 23:11

Quite literally...

WouldRatherHaveCake · 23/06/2015 00:24

sock Grin

ColdFeetWarmHeart · 23/06/2015 01:05

5hell not sure on cycle length really. I have no AF when on the pill. Last time I came off pill my cycles were roughly 60 days long (I have PCOS)

I am getting impatient my with ovaries - I am thinking of writing them a strongly worded letter, complete with diagrams on how the female cycle should work!!
Right, starting tomorrow I am following a strict diet. No wheat/gluten, no caffeine, low gi and low sugar........hopefully that will kick start something!! I think I might even be glad of period pain about now.......at least I'd know SOMETHING was working!!!

Good luck for tomorrow sock !!!!

CountryGal4 · 23/06/2015 07:22

I'm so annoyed this morning.

Anyone got any good news?

ThursdayLast · 23/06/2015 07:29

Oh no country what's up?

Good luck today sock!

I went out for a curry with friends last night and it was delicious! As I was driving home at 11pm there was still light in the sky - bit weird.
I think I'm still a bit ewcm-y but dunno if I can be arsed to shag today.

CountryGal4 · 23/06/2015 07:38

My body is being an idiot and can't seem to work out what it's doing but yesterday it chucked a heap of ewcm at me. Couldn't get what was required. But I can't be angry about it for fear of putting further pressure on. So I'm annoyed but can't be annoyed. What a healthy adult way to process/express emotions

ChatEnOeuf · 23/06/2015 08:53

Good luck Sock

Tinkfromlovejoy · 23/06/2015 08:55

6dpo and nauseous Hmm you would think after 6 years ttc I would be a bit more sensible about such things by now.

country eat cake, go for a run, or do whatever gets your endorphins going. What's done is done, dwelling on it will ruin your day. Flowers

Good luck sock

CountryGal4 · 23/06/2015 09:02

Thanks tink

ThursdayLast · 23/06/2015 09:14

very rational advice from tink country, perhaps amends can be made today?

Sensible? What's that tink? Smile

5hell · 23/06/2015 09:16

country i second tink's suggestion of exercise...sweat the frustration out of your system. there is also a supposedly smile-inducing picture of a squirrel doing the rounds today... Hmm

i'm alos full of nausea tink which didn't help my kerazy yesterday, i think i might have become more sens to progesterone.

cold you must have the patience of a saint to deal with 60 day cycles! dh went no grain for a while recently and if made a massive difference to how we both felt - much 'lighter' and refreshed, so gx your change makes you feel good too :)

nfmv - cd2, painful period thank goodness i didn't waste a bargain frer

5hell · 23/06/2015 10:08

pointless thread of the day?...

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat/2408460-Help-me-work-out-what-colour-my-eyes-are-with-picture

why?

lildottie · 23/06/2015 10:50

dear God! people are clearly bored!

ColdFeetWarmHeart · 23/06/2015 12:42

5hell I don't have much choice in the matter! I would love it if my cycles were more like 28-35 days (I got my hopes up and thought I might have a 35 day cycle as I had a bleed 35 days after stopping pill) but alas, I cannot snap my fingers and make it so!! Sad

I had avoided eating too much wheat etc last week, and just that made me feel much better. I binged a little on it on Sunday and yesterday, so need to reign myself in a little bit. Felt hungover yesterday - massive sugar headache. Had hot water with lemon this morning, and had my shake for breakfast. I feel skinnier already haha Grin

CarrotPuff · 23/06/2015 14:42

Sending all uncooperative miriods a kick up the balls and Wine and Cake to all the viriods who need it. Gluten free Cake for Cold!

Good luck with your exam Sock!

5hell yay for AF, I guess a BFP after a mc will always be somewhat frightening, but it looks like you do need a bit more time Flowers

Tonight I've dreamt I've had 3 BFPs. With very strong lines. Would be nice if it was a prophetic (?) dream, although this month is actually the one I wouldn't mind not being pg. Also I think I've iced much earlier this cycle, as I'm already sprouting spots while I'm "supposed" to only be about half way through the twot Hmm

justtheonethen · 23/06/2015 16:54

Opk still positive (I think) but bit of a rise in temp today. Any experts want to tell me if they think I've iced or can I not tell until after 3 days of high temps?

Throwing Wine and Cake out left right and centre.

How is everyone? I'm feeling lonely and dp has only been gone for one night Sad

These be our very C's & our U's 'N our T's proudly JSing their way to poetic BFPs in #49.Together we Shall take off our robes (to shag),put on our crowns (to copulate);we have/immortal longings in us!
These be our very C's & our U's 'N our T's proudly JSing their way to poetic BFPs in #49.Together we Shall take off our robes (to shag),put on our crowns (to copulate);we have/immortal longings in us!
Tinkfromlovejoy · 23/06/2015 16:59

I'm afraid you need to keep shagging just, lh spikes generally precede ovulation. You've probably got another 12-36 hours to go afaik. Get your cape on!

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