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These be our very C's & our U's 'N our T's proudly JSing their way to poetic BFPs in #49.Together we Shall take off our robes (to shag),put on our crowns (to copulate);we have/immortal longings in us!

999 replies

Augusthomotherium · 10/06/2015 19:57

Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)

  1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
  2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
  3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
  4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.
  5. Thou shalt not be offended by the word vagina.

JSing lingo


ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others. Also known as 'the witch', 'bitch witch' and 'that one with the red shiny convertible'

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit), or PIATLH (Tea light holder), PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in! PONF = Pee on Nigel Farage (Self explanatory, who wouldn't?)

ROC = Receptacle of Choice - what one chooses to use for the task of POAS. Optional decorations include photographs of controversial political leaders.

JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet or jizz in the eye. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.

Shagging like Something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession. Warning - this may happen to you if you start trying to POAS at 5dpo. PUT. THE. PISSY. STICK. DOWN. IT'S TOO EARLY!

Contraband (or Cuntraband) = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

SOTM = Shagger of the Month. Awarded with varying regularity to those viroids who go above and beyond EOD shagging in pursuit of that BFP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture. AKA Schroedingering!
TWPU - Two Week Piss Up!

Keeping your gingers = fingers crossed, yet another autocorrect development! Shortened to 'gx'

Doing A Lemon = Testing WAAAAAAAY to early!

Miroid - The male compadre of a viroid

Cat - Compulsory

Skittletits - Killer molten painful tits and nipples

Ghost jizz/goat jazz - When the amazing foof sucks up all the jizz - achieved when coming at the same time/nearly the same time.

The link to Part 47 is HERE

The current Grads Fred is HERE

The current Mumming Fred is HERE

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is HERE

The Fred about 'how wooode' our Fred is darlings can be found HERE and HERE

Stats sheet is HERE

The JustGiving page to donate in memory of TinyChat is HERE

We are the dark side of MN... Welcome!
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Thread gallery
31
justtheonethen · 19/06/2015 18:48

You're right, I think a shag orgasm might sort me out!

CountryGal4 · 19/06/2015 18:52

Just trying to be a cheerleader tell me off if it feels like pressure. I basically had to force myself. O has perked me up a bit. Have two you need them! Yep I think I'm all about the double surge.

justtheonethen · 19/06/2015 20:14

No you're great, I need a cheerleader. I'm so grumpy at the moment!

CountryGal4 · 19/06/2015 20:20

Then i prescribe two o ' s and a chocolate cupcake chased with a glass of gin

justtheonethen · 19/06/2015 20:24

Thanks doctor. I'll get working on that!

5hell · 19/06/2015 20:34

ok so who's had the sexy new haircut (FB)?

ThursdayLast · 19/06/2015 21:27

How is everyone this evening?

I'm delighted because I listed 5 things on eBay this eve and I've sold 4 of them already Grin

WouldRatherHaveCake · 19/06/2015 21:28

That's amazing! Jealous

ThursdayLast · 19/06/2015 21:31

I know!

But hang on...CAKE???

WouldRatherHaveCake · 19/06/2015 21:53

Go very one needs cake

honeysucklejasmine · 19/06/2015 21:56

I think it's Sky with the fab new hair.

SockQueen · 19/06/2015 21:58

I was supposed to be revising, but one of my old consultants took me out for drinks to celebrate passing my end of year review. Lovely to catch up, but am a bit too fuzzy-headed to work now.

justtheonethen · 19/06/2015 22:07

Tis sky with the luscious new locks. Making me want to get a "proper" cut. My hair just exists, it's not anything. I'm considering a long fearne cotton esque bob. Thoughts? From those that have seen my face or just those with an opinion on fearnes old hair!

SkyWasMadeOfAmethyst · 19/06/2015 22:10

It is me with the blonde ambition. Currently pulling a Bridget Jones eating chips and chocolate buttercream by the spoonful and contemplating the white wine in the fridge door... Feeling a bit sorry for myself as DP hates the makeover and it is so new I'm not really confident in it yet. Though my Facebook has basically exploded. Why can't he just pretend it looks irresistible?! Men!!!

Singing Happy Birthday in my best Marilyn Monroe voice to fluffy

ThursdayLast · 19/06/2015 22:15

He will sky, change makes them go all ShockShockShock
In my case it's because when I thought I was telling my DH my plans, he wasn't fricking listening

justtheonethen · 19/06/2015 22:16

Ooh thursday I love that! I do an eBay sell in the summer hols. usually buy more than I sell

sock that does sound more fun! Don't feel guilty, you might as well have another drink and work tomorrow.

Feeling happier now be side of aforementioned cocktail but not feeling the jsing today/this cycle. I almost feel like if I don't try I can't be disappointed iyswim? I know that's stupid and obvs I will get my cape on. I think I'm jus scared I won't ice before dp goes. I'll be fine if I do. We have shaggec EOD up til tues but not since then. I just need to give myself a stern talking to.

What's everyone else up to? I'm sitting in the garden on my new bargain teak table and chairs (£15) by my bargain chiminea (£10) by the light of my new aldi lantern (£7.99). Such a cheapskate!

These be our very C's & our U's 'N our T's proudly JSing their way to poetic BFPs in #49.Together we Shall take off our robes (to shag),put on our crowns (to copulate);we have/immortal longings in us!
ThursdayLast · 19/06/2015 22:17

just I love Fearne cottons long bob - I've tried it myself, but a couple of inches shorter suits me best.

How can I get in the FB group? I have mega FOMO now Grin

justtheonethen · 19/06/2015 22:17

Photo obv from earlier, I'm not in sunnier exotic climes!

justtheonethen · 19/06/2015 22:19

Pm lil or jelly I think. Or can anyone add? I'll try if you send me your email

ThursdayLast · 19/06/2015 22:21

I was wondering why it was so light where you were!
I live well west and it's not that light here still Grin

I'll try now, thanks!

justtheonethen · 19/06/2015 22:21

sky I know what you mean, I'm the same with anything new when I'm not totally confident in it yet. I don't see how he can't love it.

SkyWasMadeOfAmethyst · 19/06/2015 22:23

just that would look great on you! Do it do it!

SkyWasMadeOfAmethyst · 19/06/2015 22:28

He seems quite sure he will never love it.HmmConfusedAngry

justtheonethen · 19/06/2015 22:28

Thinking it might require quite a lot of work to look that low maintenance though? Bear in mind that I am crap at any kind of hair styling!

justtheonethen · 19/06/2015 22:31

Basically want this

These be our very C's & our U's 'N our T's proudly JSing their way to poetic BFPs in #49.Together we Shall take off our robes (to shag),put on our crowns (to copulate);we have/immortal longings in us!