TTC #2 and turning into a nut job! Part 2!

[BartBaby]

Still ttc. Still nutty. Come join us

So I've got my blood result and all is good but hcg shows me as not pg!! So I'm going back to gp tomorrow to organise my referral.

Despites knowing I wasn't pg, having the blood test results have give me a massive sadness (I've been sobbing since).

ninu congratulations.

I can definately identify with the emotional rollercoaster.

dildoos congratulations for the new job.

stone totally understandable. Even though we know we're not pregnant we can't help but hope. Just want it so much. I hope they can figure out what's going on as soon as poss.

dildoos I'm going for a new job too - hope your luck rubs off on me! Well done!!

(Sorry on phone so can't see who said it) but totally agree with not wanting to wear DH out!! Although my DH has been fantastic. This is out first month ttc since mmc and he asked me last night what the schedule was!!!

FFS what is wrong with me? I just cracked and tested again. Of course bfn. I took it apart again just for a thorough line check. Nutter. At least I now have no tests left in the house.

stone I hope you are ok. And totally get why you are sad. Big hugs xx

Stone my lovely have a good cry it will do you good, then when your tears are gone you can look to the positive of a referral. Hugs my lovely. X
Fed up - I can relate to your complete bonkersness! I have everything crossed for you!
Be- I hope your ok.
Thank you for all for the congrats I am excited xx

Be! Good luck for job yes maybe we will get 3 new jobs here too xx

Well done dildoos on the new job!
I'm as nutty as you do too fedup. I def think I'm out this month and have turned into a right moody cow!

sorry stone that it wasn't better news as you always hope. hope you get some answers.

I guess I'm just running out of things to try apart from the 'just relax' which we all know is impossible. Feeling very out of control and hopeless like one said.

Feeling bloated, fat with spotty bad skin so know af is coming to get me. I wish we felt and looked amazing at the time of af - surely it would make this a teeny bit easier?

Glad some DHs are on the ball with schedules and ttc efforts - I'm impressed!! Mine is pretty good too apart from getting wasted and coming home at 4 am on ov day

Have a good evening ladies I'm going for beer and comfort food just to make myself feel more bloated!!!

Fed up that's a smart move if you ask me, I will Ching Ching your beer with a black cherry bulmers! X

Oooooh I haven't tried black cherry one, sounds yum! I love the pear ones.

Morning ladies, how are you all?

So i got woken up in the early hours with bad cramps :(
Loaded my knickers with pads this morn as feel af is flying in.

I hope your wrong Fedupand those cramps are stretching pains (which I have loads of. .. very scary cos it feels just like AF is about to come).
I really hope you get your bfp soon

You're. . not your! I hate it when my phone makes a worse speller then I already am!

Noooooooo fed up, I hope it's not my lovely.

Thanks ninu
I had bad cramps with my second pregnancy (not til after bfp though) and know how scary they are so hope you are ok.

Am going to be on constant knicker watch today. Already want to be at work so I can check - how pathetic is that!! Almost there...

ninu ive had the cramps aswell. Pretty much all day yesterday, the day before, and this morning aswell. It is scary as it really does feel just like af. Ive been reassured that its normal though.

Hope its not af fedup

I had 2 wierd dreams last night. In the first i was due to give birth, dh was packing his bag to go away to work. Then i started getting pains and dropped to the floor and baby pretty much fell out and i just caught it. In the second i was at 4+2 weeks and started bleeding and lost it rollercoaster of emotions or what?!

Anyone else constantly having dreams about babies and poas??

I have everything crossword for you fedup

Thanks ladies. Struggling today but good to know you are there supporting me through the worst worst horrid parts of the cycle. Love you ladies even though I don't really know you!

One of my colleagues just rang me to tell me her sister has just miscarried. And now she understands what I went through... But I say, the aftermath / ttc again is so crushing. Going to try get myself out of this dooooom.

Hope you feel better Fedup and those cramps are a red herring. Gosh our bodies are cruel to us, why are most pregnancy symptoms the same as AF symptoms?

I know what you mean about feeling out of control, my stress levels are through the roof at the moment due to work issues. If love to quit but we're trying to move so need my salary to get the mortgage approve. Not good for when you're TTC!

My DH is going to do some of his techniques on me hopefully - he's a Psychologist who works with cancer patients so has some stress reducing methods, I've been nagging him for weeks to enlighten me but life is just to hectic for a few hours together. Oh how I long for maternity leave!!!!

Big hugs fedup. As someone said before, what can't AF make you feel wonderful instead, so at least it's not all bad? I hope it comes and goes quickly.

I've heard that ladies who have had a miscarriage put a lot of pressure on themselves to be pregnant again by (what would have been) their due date. I don't feel that way yet but then I've still got 5 months to go. I don't know if you are feeling like this, but it could still happen.

Are you getting support from your DP? It's hard to explain to them how we feel sometimes (particularly the depth of our emotions) because its not the same, but he is completely on your side. Take care of yourself x

Oh gosh - this thread is a real roller coaster ride.

Stone I am so so sorry about your result. We can know, we can tell ourselves, we can be sensible - but deep down we always, always hope that we may be pregnant. I'm sure you did have a sob, I can completely identify.

I started bleeding on monday, temps had dropped so I wasn't surprised, but was in quite a lot of pain. Epu called me to go in my hcg was still 18 last week. Did a scan and saw what may have been ectopic as tube full of blood. Ovaries were polycystic, don't really know what that means - I don't have pcos or any pcos symptoms. Blood test on Monday came back as hcg 3 - really relieved as we want to start trying again, but with all of those cysts, don't know if it will be difficult. They said ibshould get a gyne referral in a month or two, so will prob do that. I obv love having a scanner up my fanny.... also I need to put on weight and eat some fruit and veg as I think my lifestyle is a bit shitty.

Ninu - CONGRATS!!! Yes, you bfp'ers give us hope. Have you had a nice strong line yet? This is great news, you must be really pleased.

Fedup, how is knicker watch going? Fingers massively crossed for you. Hoping you're up the duff!

Didloos, was it a good drink? I've planned on having a drink on the weekend - big thig for me. Need it after this
week.

Hoohah, could you pass on some tips - I know ill be going nuts as soon as I ovulate.

Yes geta this is certainly the TTC#2 roller coaster thread (with lots of nuttiness). Who would have thought no. 2 would be such a challenge for so many. It must be tougher because people assume your happy and things will happen cos you've already got one child. It's very good that your hcg levels are below 5 though... bring on SMEP (result is 2/2 in my case).

My test this morning was quite a bit stronger and came up within the 1st minute. I can tell it's getting stronger cos my nausea is too. I won't complain though.

Thanks 2be, nothing to report from knicker watch yet. Still cramping though.. It was me who said I wish we felt (and looked) wonderful at af time as this would make it easier as basically I look and feel like a spotty, bloated jacket potato. Yes, DH is supportive but not sure he will ever get what it's like to be the woman, counting days and noticing every twinge and experiencing all the hormonal fluxes. Think only girls get that. You are right though, my due date is approaching (sept) and never questioned before that I wouldn't be preggers by then. Now it's coming so quickly and I'm not. Oddly I think I may feel less stressed about it once it has passed if that makes sense?

It is a rollercoaster geta. Sorry for bringing my doom to this thread after the 3 exciting bfps. And hope you are ok with the bleeding and fanny investigating sticks. What made me laugh about those was that the sonographer goes 'it's just like a tampon'. Tampon??? It's like a cucumber!! Hope SMEP works for you... We have tried this for last two months but I have heard it does work and ninu is an example!

miss sorry you are stressed out too. I was with work but realised I needed to talk to them about it as life was so miserable, I had a shite work life balance which wasn't helping with getting over miscarriage and ttc. I've made some good changes and things are better in that dept. I would also be interested in what your DH says!! I long for mat leave too - big time!!!

Big hugs to all who need one

Nutter alert!! As I'm now 10 days late and guess af will not turn up this month do you think I'm losing my mind wanting to opk?

Stone, I would opk too as some people do just miss a period one month for no real reason so I would be POAS if I were you