We are all jolly well going to get preggers this month in a nonchalant non-psycho way, and hang onto it, and there will be no brooking of any argument whatsoever!

[ScreamIfYouWantToGoFaster]

Welcome across Rat Smackers! Glad you found the place okay. This is THE MONTH when we get those deceitful pee sticks to own up to the BLINDINGLY OBVIOUS - we are all already preggers! After all; positive people get positive pee sticks!

I hope you all like what I've done with our new home

You'll note the updated title, courtesy of farfalla. Various healthy snacks have been set out on the coffee tables, to ensure our bumps are receiving the appropriate nutritional balance

Also, my personal favourite adjustment, you'll note the strategically positioned peephole, right here, providing us with a sneaky preview of the utopian delights awaiting us in the NO BROOKING vomitorium ante-natal thread.

So let's get to it preggos! Remember: see a rat - smack it!

End of March but DS came 3 weeks early - eeek!

Test! Test! Test! Test! Test!

Morning! Hope everyone's well! I had a dream that I got my BFP last night - two really clear lines on an internet cheapie!! Little babies Fedex and DHL are clearly trying to tell me something. Bad thing is I got monstrously drunk last night - now feeling like shite hugely guilty that I've ruined my babies. No matter how certain I am that I'm going to cut down during the 2ww, I never seem to be able to. My friends are such bad influences.

I expect that while I've been typing this post we've had 5 BFPs...

Oooh, I'm due 10 April too this cycle!

I think you can kind of swirl nutella into cupcake batter, Ninja .

I can't wait til I can join you! But I'm not going to start trying until a) my downstairs DIY projects are done and b) my BMI is in the healthy range, and since you are all obviously pregnant or will be shortly I'm sure you'll have moved on by then.

Oh, I meant to post this yesterday - Scream you said that if you haven't BFPd by 14 DPO, you're out of the game...I'm not sure that's right - lots of charts on Fertility Friend show negatives on 14 DPO and beyond and then end up showing a positive - so don't lose hope! As we always say, it's ain't over until the Fat Lad sings!

I love the new thread, and brilliant notion re all these snacks - the crumbs will be irresistible to rats, you sneaky things! I see you nonchalantly scattering cheesecake all over the floor and hiding a mallet behind your back! THIS is exactly why the Brookers of No Arguments get so many BFPs.

Hi CheerfulYank. I have to ask but is 'downstairs DIY project' some sort of euphemism?

Hope you are able to join soon and good luck in the meantime x

:o As soon as I reread what I'd posted I started giggling, Biscuits. No, no vajazzling or anything of that ilk! I just have a lot of projects to finish in the downstairs of my house- painting, refinishing the floors, a door to hang, etc. I know I won't want to do any of that while preg or with a baby, so I want to do that first.

Morning ladies! Seeing all the activity in here I thought for sure there would be a BFP! Good luck to everyone testing!!!

As for me, AF still hasn't arrived. That does mean that this has just crossed over into cd 29, which is the furthest I've ever gone, however the cramps are still in full force. Nonetheless I am BROOKING NO ARGUMENT from AF and her evil minions the false pee sticks! I'm very :) at the whole cd 29 thing, and looking forward to my pee stick victory on saturday! (No testing before saturday though!)

Good self restraint Scream fingers crossed AF has got the message and will be away for a while :) xx

I see I am lacking the required shed load of internet cheapie pee sticks . This will be needed to confirm my clearly imminently-showing pregnancy. I expect to be showing from 4 weeks AT THE LATEST bearing in mind this will be DC #2. (And I was, of course, whale-like with DD and had commiserations about the size of my bump from about 30 weeks on with all around assuming I must be dropping any second. Disheartening for a normally slim ish person to outgrow all their smaller maternity clothes way before the end...). And I am BROOKING NO ARGUMENT about getting knocked up this month despite still breastfeeding DD1. I'm willing those ovaries to spit out eggs like I can shell peas... (with even more determination than last month)

CheerfulYank you need to get up the duff ASAP, nothing like a bit of nesting to whip that downstairs of yours into shape, guaranteed . After years of persuasion of DH/ months of sitting on the market a bit of heavy pregnancy got our house sold and us moving within 6 weeks of viewing shiny new house/giving birth (hurrah for escaping our old house!!!). It's definite. Do it!

Good luck to all those peeing on a stick as I write this, I can feel the BFP's looming

oh, and have finally had AF since DD's arrival. Therefore it is even more confirmed for me this month...

Dreamfeeder I was the same with DS - enormous, growing out of first lot of maternity clothes, people giving you that look if you say how long you've got left (from about 7 mths I just had to say 'oh, not long now').

Mind you he was 3 weeks early though - was your DS early? How old is she now?

Good news on AF being back so you can crack on with proving your current pg!

I got a BFP earlier this week so pretty excited but too nervous to go to a pg thread! It has taken us 19 mths to get this far so still struggling to get my head round it

What do we want?

POSITIVE PEE STICKS!

When do we want them?

NOW!

Sorry, don't know where that came from.

Massive congrats biscuitsandtea

I had a little cry in the car on the way home from buying a moses basket in mothercare after the sales lady was horrified at how long I had to go and said....oh....well you really are huge... are they sure everything's alright?!? YES IT BLOODY WAS!!!!

My DD refused to arrive and finally turned up after 52 hours.... or was it 57?? after my waters broke but I didn't go into labour- an induction and third degree tear we shall not go into later- making her 4 days late but she wouldn't have turned up then of her own choosing!!!

She is 10 months old now, but i have a serious condition called Paid Work Shy-ness which means all I want to do is stay at home with my LO and look after her myself. Therefore my best option is to get up the duff as soon as possible and have a small age gap and hopefully then not make enough money for 2 children in childcare to make going back to work worthwhile. See my genius?! Also persuaded grandparents to travel 100 mile round trip to look after said DD, 1 day of the 2 I have wangled for going back to work on (Boo! Hiss!) and DH will be off for the other. Job done. Except I promised impending pregnancy and not long-term ness for the grandparent arrangement.

Morning ratsmackers!! I saw this title and it made me go

Here, I have made some delicious breakfast muffins and Bucks Fizz for you all (tempting fate as we are all soooo preggers obviously).

I have decided that I cannot deny my control freak
determined nature so I need to Do Something to help me get updiffed (even more than I already am). No relaxing and it will happen round these parts!

So as well as this glorious thread I am seeing a reflexologist tonight, acupuncture next week and will be playing my hypnotherapy CD this week, gearing myself up to insane rat smacking this month.

Good to see some visitors from the vomitorium over, hope you all start to feel better soon!

Gah, there were 3 more pages I had not read before posting!

Welcome Dream.
Imps - dreams of BFPs - so clearly A SIGN!!
Maybe and Scream - have you tested yet, go on go on, we want a BFP early doors on this thread please!

Waving to everyone else.

P.S. Does anyone else check this thread as the first thing they do in the morning? I get in to the office, make a coffee and get on mumsnet, ignoring all urgent type emails that have arrived as i need to check in with the rat smackers :)

I can't believe I've missed so much already!

I am really serious this month, have bought lots of new cake making equipment, so even more crumbs for the rats.

I was also going to take my temp again this month because I missed it, but I keep waking up and messing it up. Not psycho though

I love cheesecake :) :) Sorry, that wasn't actually relevant.

See a rat, smack it!!

no, not me farfalla.

I am just having a wee check while my sample warms up, it's a bit cold to analyse right now. Honest.

I am battling a new mn addiction to this thread... I feel I may join the morning checkers. If DD gives me half a chance that is...

I check as soon as I put my temp into FF!

Oh my goodness, I go to bed for a mammoth sleep, and wake to much activity!

Hello Dream and cheerful Positive names such as these get positive pee sticks. Oh yes they do.

Farfalla Loving the action plan. Will all be entirely unnecessary of course

Date night sounds amazing Generic

Ooooh, and good luck Little