Aaaah Autumn...BESH style. Join the MAD and may your loins be fruitful.

[Ariesgirl]

Aaaah Autumn...

Season of jizz and menkul WOOFLing,
Close bosom-friend of the maturing ovaries;
Conspiring with him how to SWI and bless
With baybees the hags that round the thatch eves drink gin run.

Join with us in making this MAD season very fruitful indeed.

Poll I started moaning and rocking whilst reading of your morning. I have massive sympathies.

I cannot comment on dresses. I used to wear wrap dresses, when I had a proper role in society. Now I just wear wellies, trackies and hoodies and anything else ending in -ies. I have already enlightened the deli this morning on how to tell me apart from a homeless person so I shan't do it again here but it is getting harder to tell.

Am greatly enjoying mental image of 12pt going about her everyday business dressed in a slit-to-clit number with extra ruffles

Leaving my lovingly-handmade-distilled-in-glass-jars-handblown-by-local-craftspeople-tied-with-raffia "Twirls Steeped In Vodka" for readysaltedpeanuts .

Oh yes, I think it would go down a treat with the people generally found in my workplace.

Fanks Cass, I do love that flaky chocolate vodka hit!!

Pol you are now my lesbian crush. All that kitchen based mayhem and you don't break a sweat.

I have cooked brownies. They fell apart when I took 'em out of the tin on account of being a bit too sticky. I will be serving them warmed up on top of ice cream, and claiming they were meant to be like that.

Extreme Droiding continues. I may suggest it as an Olympic sport.

Hello BESHtahs

about my AWOLness causing any worry. Warming my cockles to know people care, fanks very much. I heart you all.

I'm sulking big time due to my IUI not working. Pissed off I just don't seem to be able to win my baybee :(. In agony with droid pain that just won't go :(. Have been away trying to work out what we should do. I haz mostly been drinking, smoking and eating crap like whole bags of onion rings crisps in one go (Zita would NOT be happy). Next step IVF and I'm scared....about the actual process as well as if it doesn't work. I also cannot be bothered thinking about TTC as it is consuming me - so may be in the shadows for a while. (Ooh, halloween thread, cobwebby wombs and all that? Not that I'll be around ) Dilemma for ya...how do I forget about TTC whilst keeping in touch with you luvverly laydeez?

I'm sorry this is all about me. I've only skim read as it's been so long but believe some congratulations are due to Twinkle and there is fresh blood - Hello newbs, soz I'm not at my best.

hello luvverly lady.

Know what you mean about staying in touch but not wanting to obsess about TTC. Is shit.

So I shan't talk about how horribly sad and unfair it is.

Instead, I will try to grope you, and ask advice about my brownie-fail. Does demerara sugar put brownies at risk of falling apart, or am I just a shit baker?

Dear Cinco, how lovely to see you and how wretched this business is . Completely understand about wanting to put it all from your mind for now. Whenever you want to come back here we'll be with gin and Salty's brownies (which will not fall apart, for I decree it ). Or indeed you can stay here and talk about anything else that takes your fancy. Big loves scissor-kicks to you old bean.

Depends on your recipe my luvver, sounds as though it's a bit dry which is why it's crumbling, probably not the demerara although does have quite large granules which may not combine fully, perhaps cooked for too long? Did you leave it in the pan to cool for a bit before removing? When I do brownies I take out the oven when it still looks slightly under done, this ensures a lovely gooey hot brownie that when cools goes deliciously fudgy. Double yum.

No they aren't dry, more too gooey. They've sort of stuck back together and they're very chewy.....I didn;t let them cool for long actually, that may have been problemo....

Thanks Bangers

They sound lush meoldsalts, a chewy brownie is a gorgeous brownie in my book

Hello lovely tartyone. So sorry to hear you're going through such shit. If it helps at all - a tiny bit? - we here have been missing you and wondering how you are. I'm sure your classmates don't think you're a loony freak - I bet they're loads more weird than you. We'd love to see you any time you like. Snogs.

ooooh Tarty you can be our very own "expert" like on a horrible mid morning itv tv program or sumfink...

Headgirl have I told you lately how fab you are? have I?

fivepies so sorry about teh crapness- ooh, look, have just received a telegram from La Zita (hallowed be her name) herself saying 'Urgent stop don't stop eating Onion rings stop you can eat what you bloody well like when the gloom takes you and do whatever you need to feel better stop much love (and fish slaps, for lo I am a follower of the Besh path too) zita stop. PS Can I haev your brownie receipe, stop
wow! that's amazing,who'd have thought she reads our litle thread (can you imagine if t'were true)
I don't think you have much to worry about on the ttc front here anyway, seems to have turned into a Genital and Urinary Medecine support group. UnBEshly hugs, hope droid pain goes soon, come and offload any time night or day.

I have noted in the past that not many people post much on the saturday night- is it because you all have lives? Am not really watching the x factor as I disagree with that stuff, but just wondered about the Zimbabwe immigration situation, so just dipped in. Why is Dali on?

I am also not watching ex factor Moley

yeah, and head I've got loads of size 18 clothes that are too small don't fit me, don't think you're so special [goes off to find head voodoo doll for pinning purposes, but can't find it because it is TOO SMALL]

saltayre (its a swimming pool in Lancaster, I think of it whenever I see your name) (no, it's a compliment) you wouldn't be able to explain to a dunce like me what the difference between letting three people in last week and then another one in the week, and just letting four in last week??

I bet she doesn't but has one of her minions do it to keep up to date with the goings on in the minds of 30ish TTCers :S

I am off to drown my sorrows in more drink have fun with some friends. The shackles are off! Have a fabulous evening darlinks

mole I have no 'external' saturday night life but my internal, wine enhanced one is ok.

Poll your dog anecdote just made me cry laughing. One of the funniest things I've read in aaaggges :O The ruined chuntney/jam was not at all funny though. I made all my mates biscuits last year which take a lot less preparation and effort than jam and such things.

sinnytart boh hiss at shiteness. Fancy a snog? Speaking of cakes, I had a lovely recipe for a choc cake/brownie mix which had prunes in it and was all chewy and nice.

Very pleased to find out LaR is crap - have been gazing at their site but now I know it's just a waste of money I can go and spend my pennies elswhere.

Aries that Monsoon dress is lovely for someone slim like you. Wha about this? I'm very partial to dresses of the simple, drapey kind but would wear something like that if I could.
headbee you are obviously a gorgeous size 14.

No Moley I wouldn't be able to explain that, as I am not watching it. However hypothetically speaking, that seems to not make any freaking sense....

could I please say that although I am not watching X factor, I do love Cher. Dear little thing.

Oh that's gorgeous Milano!

Am at missing Strictly. Apparently Widdecombe's salsa was legendary!

Am not watching it on delay as bedtime interfered slightly, so haven't only just watched her, liking the rap, but not sure she can actually sing? If I'm going to be lending the full weight of my support to anyone, which I'm not, it would have to be the Grimshaw boy, as he's a sandgrownian. Hopefully by his turn they'll have sorted out the technical hitch which is making it sound like no one can sing in tune, (I noticed when I flicked over from a BBC3 documentary about Very Important Stuff)

Oh shit, I broke the thread I broke the thread [shick] or even

8 flippin' pages since I last posted - I need more laudanum after that.

Soooo... HeadieB sorry to hear about your folks break in, hope they are ok and that you have kicked yoir selfish siblings into touch.

Am about your sis, rocket, hopefully she's just being all busy, who else have you told now?

Welcome to Monkeybusiness Here have some laudanum (but make sure you pass it back as I have an addiction to feed).

Huge congratulations to Twinkle

Well done on all the shagging Aria I am well jealous, haven't had a marathon like that for years!

Thanks to you all for all the lovely stuff you said about our current pause in ttcing. We will continue to discuss it and the decision is by no means set in stone. I think maybe we'll chat about it on a month by month basis and see where we're at. I can handle that thought much better - so we won't try this month but next is still a possibility.

ooh sorry I x-posted starrydigger you didn't break Fred, I'm sure everyone's just off watching the X factor or something. Mr Boo is making me watch 'Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom' on dvd. I wish he would bugger off out on a Saturday so I can watch crap in peace. Our upstairs tv has broken. Divorce may be imminent.