1001 Fallopian Nights: The BESH-Harem Opens for 30s TTCs & their silk pyjamas. Sherbert on tap. Baklava made by doe-eyed boys freely available. Kelims provided for SWI. Hookahs optional but welcome.

[Headbanger]

Scented silken tent opens its flaps* for business. Nubile veiled houris available for deep tissue sandalwood massage for that pre-droidal unease. Starlit pit tended by gleam-eyed sheiks proffering rum-soaked dates on golden platters. Goatskin rugs laid beneath hanging brass lamps for the un-PC BESH to frolic in furs. Intriguingly tarnished lantern housing benevolent Zita-Genie buried beneath piles of embroidered cushions. Don your curl-toed slippers & coin-fringed skirt, and I'll see you in the corner with a young Omar Sharif and ice cubes made from Tanqueray laced with desert honey and no you can't talk to him he's mine...

So many scans. I start panicking every time I think of mine. And then have to apply self-violence for being so pathetic.

Good luck for tomorrow Dromtastic.

You're not being pathetic to be worried about the scan, it's entirely understandable. But I thought you'd appreciate the violence anyway.

Good luck to Camel and Gin for yours too. Does this batch mean Medee's got one coming up not long after?

I read some of the other threads you've all been being so clever and sensible and honest and everything else on, and it makes me so sad that some women seem to have such a low view of themselves that they think women should be treated so badly. You all said wondrous things

Oh, I see Jane wins a baybee but not Jenny? Harumph

As much as I benefit from this arrangement, Scorps, I have to say I noticed the same anomaly! I guess somehow I managed a more heartbreaking story . Yours was more on the witty side AND you provided the conclusion and the moral of the story. Basically, you provided the more complete literary experience and did not growl for sympathy like I did. But if I may:

"Jenny gets hideously drunk at a BESHly meet up after a couple of months and a lovely baybee pops into her tummy. While being surrounded by love and care of his lovely parents, he will grow up wondering why he has been cursed by a coven of nutty aunts."

He is only a he in this story because somehow in my mind he grows up to be an acclaimed feminist scholar. Not that you should take on board my nutty projections.

Bangers I am on a mission to reduce MN word count, and I am obviously miserably failing. I think starting tomorrow I may go into lurkage.

Jenny won't ever get hideously drunk, her body is a temple innit.

Btw I didn't even realise there were 2 separate names in the stories. I thought we were just bulk-ordering happy endings. Which, by the way, is a very good plan.

know how you are feeling sistah.

yes, Ocarina, mine is next Friday.

BESH candles lit for the scans. Good luck tomorrow Drom.

"BESHs get hideously drunk and conjure up babies for the ones who managed to stay sober."

RE: magicking up baybees or other BESHes - we don't like to talk about it but Casper and Iggy only got diffed when they went to the same conference (by chance) and sacrificed a goat to Satan in the disabled toilet. Trufax.

Just realised!!!!

When I met up with cho cam ead and beshie (who was already diffeded) the lovely eadfairy brought us home-made biscuits sprinkled with Your Ackshul Babydust (black-market obv.)

cho got a + THAT NIGHT and me n cam a month later. ead has POWERS!!!

You should all stroke her for luck :)

I remember that GingerDust, which is precisely why I am counting with BESH meet ups for the diffage .

But I did not think of stroking Edie! Come here luvver .

No point in me stroking anyone for luck - just got the ovaltine. Is only farking DPO 8. P'raps the needling isn't helping me at all

Mmmm, Babyfail 13 - defo unlucky for some.

Bah, Pette, bah. When do you usually get it, remind us? Is it usually around this time?

Blimey its taken me an hour to catch up! I am very :( and at the experiences many of you have had. I had a near miss myself when i was 14 but luckily the boy (my sister boyf) either bottled out or realised what he was doing was wrong. Still screwed me up good and proper for a while. I have decided not to go back and catch up with that thread as I think it would just be upsetting and counter productive.

Whoot! for PESHly scans and holidays. Candles lit over here but sure they will not be necessary. All will be well.

Stinks have booked appointment with needles lady next week so that should be interesting. Am i right in thinking I should drive right afterwards?

gah, should not

oh scorps bad news indeed :( how many needles sesses have you had?

No, since seeing Needles Lady it's been DPO 10/11. Feels like things are going backwards. Perhaps it's because I've become a manatee in a frock Oh, the irony of comfort-eating over babyfail fucking up my fertility!

Have had the 'magic 3' months of Needling. So-called because they say that most women having fertility acupuncture get diffed as soon as 3 months of needling have passed. I believe that's how Poo won her Christchild.

I need to see my Docs and get a ref for the Barren Clinic. And I bet I won't be one of the lucky ones who win an ironic insta-diff as soon as they're about to start AC, either

Nothing to say really Scorps. Come 'ere for a snuggle :(

Good luck to the scanees.

:( Scorps I know how frustrating it is. But there must be some leaway. You might be the special 4th month diff. Who wants to be average anyway.

This morning, George Harrison's Got my mind set on you, came on the radio just as we were about to get up (after failing to have early morning OV day secs as planned) and I thought how appropriate the lyrics were if i was singing it to my none un born child...

Cosmic finger flickage.

:( crap Scorps, it is so unfair. Frustrating and not fair. Pants.

ScoreMyPet come and snuggle in my buzwams. I promise they are ample. Do I dare ask are you sure this is it?

If you are sure, that is.

Scoraline sorry to read that. Have a hug and a chinese burn.

Ovaltine, vague droidy rumblings; am sure.

Lovely VAG! I feel like you're my guardian angel - everytime I have a babyfail you always swoop in to console Is v much appreciated :)