Poncetastic Christmas 2021

[VivaJen]

Welcome to the 2021 Poncetastic thread. With a nod to Fellatio (wherever she is), at the stroke of midnight, let the poncing commence.

OK, first of all, I know it's still September by we need to start this thread now because as you all know, having a truly Poncetastic Christmas involves precision planning, strategy, bravery, heroics, and frequently martyrdom.

So, if you, like me, actually want to make the next twelve weeks of your life a misery by hand-crafting your cards, finding a huge bucket for Nigella's turkey in brine, pickling pears, shrivelling oranges in a low oven for those rustic au naturel decorations, dragging half a holly bush back from the woods, and just generally being a smug annoying jobs worth ponce, join me on this thread.

Feel free to post photos of previous tree-trimming, cake icing or table centrepiece triumphs, discuss this year's bauble colour themes, debate the merits of Delia versus Gordon, road-test a selection of canapés and cocktails, (all in the line of duty) and link to lovely inspirational photos/craft ideas for a truly Poncetastic Christmas.

Warning: If your idea of a good Christmas involves Pizza, ITV, gravy granules or anything with 'Aunt Bessie’s' on the packet, this is not the thread for you".

Checking in...🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄

Looks like quite a few people are doing the Creole cake this year. We’ll be doing that too, for the first time.

I start out every year with huge poncing aspirations (in terms of the quality and quantity of what I’ll make/bake/create) but it really doesn’t matter to me whether or not I get around to it all, or even any of it, because the reading, thinking, planning and anticipation is just as important to me and fills me with so much pleasure. I also gain a lot of joy from all of you and the wonderful things you make. This thread is my happy place! Really looking forward to the Christmas Chronicles read-along too.

Happy poncing everyone! 🥂

I am going to properly join this year, after many years of lurking. I have already made damson cheese, and this weekend it's the turn of the mincemeat (delia recipe with some of the currants swapped for cranberries and cherry brandy instead of brandy - hope it's OK!)

Other than that I plan to make:

1. Wreath always with things from our garden. The garden is a disaster all year, but is amazing for wreath making - right down to the moss from the lawn! I make two, one for the door and one as an Advent wreath. @Thisisbatshit I like this youtube tutorial - but I never use holly myself, even with gardening gloves it is very prickly!

1. Anna del Conte's chocolate and nut Italian Christmas cake. I would make a fruit cake, but only me and MIL will eat it. Won't be able to make this until nearer the time though.

1. A garland for the stairs, again foraged from the garden. The trouble is that we have horizontal banisters which seems to make it difficult to attach. Two years ago I made a garland to go around our doorway as you come into our house out of birch twigs, juniper and baubles. I am not sure if something similar will be flexible enough to go around the bannisters though.

1. Embroidered Christmas napkins with everyone's initials. I am not a good embroiderer, so we will see how that goes!

1. Stained glass window biscuits after a great thread on them a couple of years ago I want to perfect my technique!

1. Gingerbread House. We usually buy the lidl kit, but I am tempted to make my own this year. I am just worried it will make a nice activity with the children a little stressful! Maybe we will need two!

1. Orange pomanders. We always dry oranges, but I bought an unexpectedly large bag of cloves earlier in the year and am tempted to make proper studded oranges. Possibly also sew some little bags to house the (many) cloves to hang in wardrobes to keep clothes smelling nice.

1. Hand lettered Christmas cards for nearest and dearest. DD is now old enough (and interested enough) to make some of these too.

I will be looking out for more suggestions on this thread, though, and will be joining the Christmas Chronicles read along thread.

I don’t know whether to order more tree lights or not. I bought some new ones last year after always complaining we never have enough. In a brainwave moment I ordered a string of 1000 so we definitely had enough for the 7ft tree. They amply covered the tree and went all the way around the rest of the room hanging from the picture hooks, it was like living in a grotto 🤣

@SevenSwansASwimming

I don’t know whether to order more tree lights or not. I bought some new ones last year after always complaining we never have enough. In a brainwave moment I ordered a string of 1000 so we definitely had enough for the 7ft tree. They amply covered the tree and went all the way around the rest of the room hanging from the picture hooks, it was like living in a grotto 🤣

🤣🤣 I can just picture that!!

@VivaJen thank you for the thread!💐

Oh hello you lovely people. I'm so glad to be joining you again (I was on the 2020 thread under a different name.) I have dreams of grand poncing but am not a brilliant baker or super crafty but I love reading your posts and will definitely be joining in the Nigel read along thread, they're just wholesome and lovely and heartwarming.

DDs and I made our first ever Christmas cake last weekend. Currently debating how often to feed it and whether we made it too early.... I'm leaning towards feeding it every two weeks but fear that it'll be so boozy by Christmas I'll have drunk children!

Attached photo of cake before it got wrapped up and put away in a cupboard.

Hello Fellow Poncetastic-ers!

I'm very much looking forward to a much more relaxed and stylish Christmas this year. We moved house just after Christmas and so it wasn't my best poncetastic effort.

I've crocheted 10 snowflakes today and I need to do 2 more before DD's bed time, and then do another 6 tomorrow for a garland.

Looking forward to @Dillidilly's readalong thread, and to really getting into the spirit this year

I’m a poncetastic observer with aspirations of some day partaking.

Just posted this on the other thread

Can I join? never taken part in these threads before. But have stalked for a while.

I have my Nigel Slater Christmas Chronicles on order.

Does it matter that whilst I do love crafting I'm not that good at it. Although I do love Christmas and very good at it IMO

PAPERWHITE NARCISSI FOR CHRISTMAS

I ordered my bulbs from Sarah Raven they should be delivered soon. I grow mine on pebbles in hurricane lamps. Generally start them on November 11th .
When the shoots are 3inches high carefully tip water out and replace with watered down gin or vodka SEE HEREThis stunts the greenery so it’s less floppy but leaves the flowers intact .
I’ve been doing them for about 30 years now and only ever had one failure and that was due to cheap bulbs I think.

MARMALADE GIN.

This is fab on Christmas morning topped up with Prosecco ( be warned it’s sneaky )

SEE HERE

@StormyCornishSeas it doesn't matter at all! Definitely join, this is the loveliest thread and I also can't wait for the CC read along

A bit more cross stitch done tonight as planned.

@NoWordForFluffy I need your holly bush neighbour's address

It's enormous too. They really wouldn't miss a few sprigs!

@Verbena87 these are the ones in the photo but if you trawl Etsy you can find lots of different versions.

Can anyone advise on floral wire gauges for wreath making. I’m planning on making some fairly delicate rosemary wreaths so definitely not too thick. I need to buy it online so I can’t just buy it by feel.

I’m also planning to make some gingerbread house decorations from cinnamon salt dough and I want to add white details so they look iced. Do you think puffy paint would be best? Or any better ideas?

@Candlesonthetable your fruit cake dilemma - have you thought about making a small one (or two)?

I use this recipe and it gives you the amount of mixture and cooking time for small tin (right down to baked bean tins) - you might be able to use the volumes and times for your recipe? (I can recommend the recipe as well though)

www.thepinkwhisk.co.uk/2012/10/christmas-cake-baking-time.html

[quote NigelSlatersXmasTaters]@StormyCornishSeas it doesn't matter at all! Definitely join, this is the loveliest thread and I also can't wait for the CC read along

A bit more cross stitch done tonight as planned.

@NoWordForFluffy I need your holly bush neighbour's address [/quote]
😊😊 thank you! I'm starting to feel festive just reading this thread

Thanks for the paperwhites info @Trumpton, I’ve never grown them but have ordered some bulbs online. I don’t drink though so will have to try to snuffle some gin out of my parents drinks cabinet.

I managed to find Mary’s stuffing recipe I usually make out of her Christmas book online, I highly recommend it

I'm loving the look of the Marmalade Gin

Can someone explain what the readalong thread is please?

I’ve managed to finish knitting some adorable Christmas baby booties for a friends little one which always makes me feel festive. I also sell them in sizes up to 12 months, if anyone is interested just drop me a DM.

Oooo @VivaJen, that list is a thing of beauty! Thank you for sharing.

I love a bit of Christmas poncing. I’m slowly getting back to pre-children levels of poncing now youngest is 18 months and husband is more on board.

Presents are mostly wrapped in brown paper and I’ve let the three year go wild with snowflake stamps. They look pretty messy but once tied with string and a little “garnish” it wasn’t too bad. I made some labels using my scanned handwriting so I don’t have to keep writing the same thing over and over too

Next up is mincemeat, biscuit doughs for the freezer and a good food buttered rum Christmas cake.

I also bought myself a tiny cross stitch card but I’m not sure when I’ll do that especially given I haven’t embroidered since I was about 18!

Hello, ambitious but rubbish poncer here!
My mother (top craft quilting queen that she is) has kindly said that she will teach me to quilt some Christmas pillow cases for my sofa so fingers crossed on them. Im also hoping to make some sort of evergreen hanging decoration for above my table. I have no idea how, I just have some vague notions about a hula hoop, greenery from the garden and some robbed off DH fishing line…

@thelegohooverer

My dd bought me a big roll of paper covered florists wire after we did a wreath workshop and it’s fabulous.
I have linked to a natural colour but it comes in lots of colours.
WIRE

@TommyShelby

I made a “chandelier “ from a large willow wreath and remote control battery candles a few years ago.

But I also liked a bicycle inner tube wrapped in string I saw. I took a photo of that one but I have so many willow wreaths I never did it.

Photos didn’t post!

has it really been a whole year since last our heartrates soared and excitement made us giddy? I'm in.

WARNING: If I may - and sorry for bringing the thread down - if you have cats, please be very careful with paperwhite bulbs. My kitty (never the brightest, poor wee dear) must have got at the bulk skin, and was very, very ill. Falling over, glazed eyes, multiple - what looked like strokes. Spent a few days in the cat hospital, and has not quite recovered. Still has no sense of balance, falls over/off of things, and trembles. Vet said this is as good as it will get.

Anyway, back to prepping for Christmas. I'm reading along and my creative juices are getting far ahead of my ability. I am keen, however!