Thread has disappeared. This is the one where I explain what I mean.

[weasleymum]

IMO

There is no BF mafia on MN.

There are people who are very strongly in favour of BF. They are right to be, it is better.

There are people who haven't BF and are upset and/or guilty. This is very sad.

But there is no mafia.

Bad post TM - it reads like you were rubbing salt in a wound. I meant when people come on threads banging on about the huge benefits of bf and the dangers of ff it rubs salt in a gaping wound.

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No, I'm evidently not explaining myself, will try again.

There are many mentions of a BF mafia, of attacks on FF-ers.

I've never seen this myself. So I've come to the conclusion that while there are random nutters, there isn't a mafia.

There are FF-ers here who are badly hurt by the experience of not BF. Of anyone is jumping on their feelings this is wrong wrong wrong, no matter how honest the intentions.

I'm not asking for links in order to start a fight, I'm asking for links to back up the assertions that there is a mafia. Until then I'll carry on believing in the "random nutter" theory.

I can't possibly search for links to something I've never seen and doubt the existence of! Where would I start?

TM that is awful .

OK, this thread caused a fair amount of upset I'd say. Mostly revolving around the misuse of the word "choice".

Let it go WM, let it go.

What harpsi said [lazy]

it is ime a matter of perspective.
bf "supporters" are generally looking at the bigger picture, in terms of encouraging women to bf, getting bf rates up, and often they support or have supported lots of women.
if people get upset, ime and imo it is generally because they are looking at matters from their own personal pov, and they are considering their own sensitivity and feelings.
this is natural but imo this is what leads to so much misunderstanding and hurt and upset.
why the f anyone thinks it is appropriate to be rude and judgmental about breastfeeding though is rather beyond me. as if bf don't have feelings. clearly.

Let it go WM, let it go.

What harpsi said [lazy]

I meant to post twice btw

Harpsi, I love you!

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Well, oops, as to what I hope to achieve with this thread:

I'd like MN to stop talking about a mafia until it's proven to exist, and instead think about why people like twinkle megan and harpsi both feel unhappy and got at, despite being on different points of the feeding spectrum.

ie, let's keep to the facts (including the facts about how we feel).

Maybe then we can have discussions on MN which can help people rather than hurt them.

Then I'd like this thread to cure avian flu, stop global warming and help England win the World Cup nect time round.

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Oops.

You want me to read through the entire feeding archives Well, that would keep me out of trouble for a while I agree.

Seriously, I can't search for something I don't believe in. I won't see it even if it jumps up and bites me in the nork. It's up to people who do believe in the BF mafia to support what they say by showing us the mafia.

They don't have to, of course - but then I'm not going to accept the existence of the mafia.

Am going to leave this in a minute, but first I must look at twinkle's link.

I was going to say I don't particularly feel got at, but tbh that isn't true.
tbh (my persepctive again) I have seem some pretty nasty comments on here attacking bf.
an example from tonight: let me substitute the relevant phrase.
"why anyone would want to (formula feed) is beyond me."
not nice, is it? if that had been the phrase then I guarantee the bf "mafia" would have jumped in and stomped all over that poster.
but it went uncommented upon by a whole bunch of folk who apparently feel very strongly that we shouldnm't judge other women on their feeding choices.
strange eh
qv I love you too

Really harpsi???

Have I martyred my norks then?

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HC - breastfeeders do have the moral highground on their side though don't they?

I wouldn't say I feel personally got at though Weasleymum. I've had a huge amount of support on here from very pro-breastfeeding women and I'm very pro-breastfeeding myself. Unfortunately I didn't find this wonderful resource in time. But I do know just how raw your feelings are when breastfeeding has gone horribly wrong and I just don't think some people quite appreciate that. Most of the time they are preaching to the converted in any case.

Well, if you are looking for some people meeting in bars, smoking cigars, wearing black suits, a machine gun on their hands and talking about "la cossa nostra" you are quite likely not to find any evidence whatsoever!

But agree that you need to find your own answers rather than upset people to get you the info you want to see. However, please be objective, there is no worse blind than that who doesn't want to see.

oh yeah don't worry though QV it was only about weirdy bfeeders
I am sorry you missed the original thread I did lots of exciting swearing on it

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Well, it hasn't gone nuclear yet. If it does, I'll ask for it to be pulled straight away.

I'm not asking for a fight here or even a discussion really. Just for examples.

I believe that the BF mafia talk is extremely destructive to MN, or I wouldn't bother mentioning it.

Oh, fgs, a bf ruck and me on a sabbatical.

I'd just like to say there's no bf mafia, there are women who'd be cunts however they fed their babies, who enjoy making other women feel bad.

And as for women who want to support other women to bf, increase bfing rates, etc, etc - wtf do they stand to gain out of it?

I'm trying to do just that on a committee at my local maternity hospital - voluntary, no expenses, taking time off work, or having to find childcare if meetings occur on precious days off.

And for what? To be slated as a member of some mafia or Nazi movement?! Christ, the last I heard, women who bf don't put horse heads in ffers beds nor gas their babies to death. Perspective needed, please.

(Hi Harpsi and TM and Oops)

Love and other indoor sports
Hunker xx

I have never felt that there is a BF mafia, apart from the whole of MN that is

Seriously, I wouldn't consult Mumsnet on this. It's my choice. If someone wants to extol the benefits of breastfeeding on here every day every minute then thats fine. I have stayed out of these arguments because I couldn't give a fuck. Maybe it's me, but an online forum, however lovely it is will never every make me feel guilty for this.

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