Martians 2014, thread 13. Who will win, team pink or team blue?

[LyraSilvertongue]

New thread, hoes!

Lyra, I think I ignored your FB invite by mistake and I can't find you again. Could you resend? Sorry!,

Lyra - ignore me. Found it. I am sooo shit with technology

Birth partner will be DH here. He's dreading it after the last one, but I am going to breathe (or maybe sneeze!) this baby out Can't imagine having anyone else there, particularly my mum. I love her to bits, but she drives me potty at the best of times.
As for pain relief, I'll see how things go. I had an epidural at 3cms with the DTs, as that'd what the hospital recommended, and I was happy to go with that (And glad of it when I needed forceps then ventouse - stubborn little buggers they were!)
With DD I did it on gas and air only. Not by choice, as there was no room on the delivery suite (I was being induced), and by the time I got down there and the anaesthetist got round to me he only got as far as siting the cannula into my hand when I needed to push, so that was that.
I'm going to try hypnobirthing this time round, but basically I'm open-minded about pain relief.

My DM was at DS' birth along with DP. She was great. I don't think it was emasculating at all. DP told me after that he felt helpless and having her there was great support. Bless him, he didn't know where to rub, or how hard, or what I was asking for. TBH, as it was no.1 neither did I. DM was great. She knew what was required, she's been there. DP was able to just be there and 'hold my hand'.
My teenage DC's are planning on being there this time! That'll be interesting!

Ouchie, headache! Sleep required but sooooo much to do! Maybe aftet lunch!!

Hows everyone doing? Anyone being scanned today? Have I already asked that somewhere else? !

lumpy hope stepfil can make some progress even if to feel a little more comfortable. A year ago my dp lost hisNan to a stroke but it wwas about 3weeks after it had happened where she had just deteriorated, she was in her 80's and I think she just wanted to give up bless her, but I can understand what a tough time you must all be having. How old is he if you don't mind me asking? Biggest hugz.

Congrats to all scanees yesterday if I havent already said it to you on fb!

Now what do I have for lunch.... .....

Saggy! How the devil are you? My DP sounds like yours. He is terrified about the labour and is grateful that my DM will be there in case he falls apart

Hello Saggy!!!
How are things with you and your pink bump?

Hi saggy, nice to see you!

I'm looking forward to the birth, I'm excited to meet our baby and not scared at all right now.

All my boy vibes have changed since our scan, after seeing the baby's little face I'm just so convinced this one is a girl.

Pink bump, christened Ryvita by her older sister, insane child is doing great. The anomaly scan was excellent. No further problems and her short femur/humerus/head measurements have hit 50th centile so she is exactly even all over!
I see my mother as a kind of unofficial doula. She did great as an advocate where DP bless him didn't have much clue.
Not tempted to leave team yellow then MummyPig?

No saggy I'm really excited to have a big surprise at the end. I'm glad your baby girl is doing so well.

Jolls! A girl! How lovely ( for you, not me; I will send a girl back). What does your fiance think? Are you chuffed?

Nice to hear you so happy after your scan, Foxy. Welcome, Bunny. I am afraid there is an initiation before you can join: you need to go and make a huge tray of fudge, photograph it and post it on your profile. Please indicate which lucky relative/friend/neighbour will be receiving such a heartwarming and thoughtful gift this Christmas.

Is anyone else thankful as fuck that bommie night is over? I live on a council estate and every benefit scrounger and his child-killing staffie were out in force with their seemingly home made bombs. Bastards.

I'm in my town library using t'internet and everyone stinks. Everyone. I am in town to get my recalcitrant thatch cut. Hurrah! I'm currently rocking the Cagney & Lacey look (the least attractive of the two who was married to Harv). Maybe, I've just ordered those Nettle Leaf boots from Clarks in slate grey. Double Hooray!!

Owl, Jolls doesn't have any kids but she does have a snake

Bloody hell fire, Apprentice! You didn't know about MummyPig's surreal pregnancy/birth? That's 'cos you're not on faceache. How many times do I have to tell you, Cassie, Owl etc to join?? It's not for the fainthearted, mind; there are photos of knobs, turds, snakes, phallic cakes and husbands in absurd Batman underpants. It's all a little shock-horror for some of you delicate flowers.

Apprentice, surely whisky and weddings is guaranteed to evoke some skullduggery? At least he apologised. Weddings do very strange things to people, which is why I now turn down every single invitation. I can't stand all that pissed-up bonhomie and complete denial that the groom is a twat. I've usually slept with the majority of the ushers at weddings anyway so it can all get a little discomfitting.

Right-o, I've caught up now and so apologies, again, for cluster-posting. I am desperate for a shit and the library has no bogs. What the...? Off to the market toilets it is, then

He's just turned 69 abi he's not the fittest and to be fair was a stroke/mi waiting to happen but it doesn't make it any easier!!!

Hi saggy glad the scan was good. Welcome bunny

Seems my baby has decided to tear me to shreds from the inside. Owww! Maybe he's showing his appreciation for the toffee apple cake (Paul Hollywood recipe) that I've just eaten several slices of

I weighed myself two days ago for the first time in months and I've put on two flipping stone! I could cry! No wonder I feel so lumpy and heavy. I really hate it and first priority after the birth will be getting rid of the excess and back in my skinnies.

Cookie - I am now on fb!

Welcome bunny.

Can't remember what anyone else has said. Memory like a sieve at the moment. Very unlike me!

I am back from the hairdressers and I look like a lesbian. I am fucking furious.

I'm sure u don't Cookie - pic on fb please!

Head is mashed today so struggling to keep up with the thread - DS isn't well, I was up half the night with him, still got the dregs of a cold myself, and both me and DS are grumpy sods today!

Also DH isn't talking to MIL - she's always been a manipulative bitch but she's finally pushed him too far so he's deleted his Facebook account and is changing his phone number. I think its the best thing he can do, but also worry that he's backed himself into a corner and its not what he really wants to happen. I don't want to get involved as I'm worried I'd make things worse - I'd love to tell her exactly what I think of her but I'm not going to. Just worrying about him

TheChickOfRock, is this the MIL who manipulates your hubby into doing stuff for her (I'm thinking of when she had a house full of germs but still wanted him to strip her walls)? Don't worry on his behalf; he can always undo the actions he has just taken to blot her out. Some people really do need that kind of action taking to make them see they are unreasonable twats. Hopefully she'll moderate her selfish and manipulative behaviour. Here, have these: they're from the hanging basket outside my hairdressers.

Saggy, it is so nice to hear from you, especially the tone of your post which was lovely and buoyant

Lyra, do not worry about the weight gain! I know how slim you are naturally and with your coffee-coloured beauty you'll never look like a lardy heifer. Tell us about your weekend away!

I'm off over to facecrack to see what Cassie looks like.....

Sorry apprentice I thought you knew the story. Basically it was pretty traumatic and took me a while to come to terms with it but I think I've done a good job!

I'm sure you look great cookie!

My little (6'4") brother is coming to tea tonight, I will have to cook plenty to satisfy his appetite. I can see ds going the same way.

MummyPig, I've always dreamed of having one of those pregnancies where you have so few symptoms that you don't realise until later on rather than the kind where I even knew about a surprise pregnancy at three weeks due to symptoms but finding out when you go into labour doesn't really sound like the most desirable option. It must have been a massive shock to suddenly have a baby to look after with zero warning.

I would imagine it's a bit like finding a tenner down the couch when you're skint.

Sorry to jump onto your thread, but has anyone heard from maybe? I know she is a martian and did post on hear for a while. I'm keen to know how she is getting on.

Hello cookie - I can only keep up with your name changes because your posts have such a distinctive and sophisticated nature . Have you heard from maybe recently?

It's too late, cookie. The transition is complete. I'm officially a lard-arse

Motorcycle, haven't seen any posts from Maybe in a while now you mention it. I'll have a look to see if she's posted on FB recently.