March 2014 - Thread 6 - Spending more time with pornographers and less time with our heads in the toilets hurrah!

[rescoonetwothree]

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Thread 5

pain in the arse about needing a job is not being in a position to get picky. Sometimes I'm so bored in work I could cry. I generally take a breath and do some counting, then remind myself how lucky I've been just getting to where I am.

If your vocation is no longer open to you Pram I'd seriously suggest you look into temping. It pays well and opens a shit load of doors.

Pram I have not heard of anyone complain of that particular problem. I have got a couple of friends into babywearing but they tend to use it in certain situations for convenience, like when you need to go somewhere not buggy friendly or when baby is crying and you need to get on with something else. You're totally allowed to be a casual babywearer!! I find the babies are quite happy to be put down, but I just want to keep wearing them. If your not sure about babywearing but you wanted to give it a go, you could borrow a sling from a sling library and try before you buy, usually its no more than a couple of squids (some are free) plus a deposit returned to you on return of the sling.

Mummy I used a Moby (bright pink, not my sling!!) for the first time the other day, they are lovely and snuggly and very forgiving if you haven't used wraps before. They can be used for roughly the 1st 6months (longer if you have a small baby, if your not hooked by then, I guess its not your thang!

F&T

Lottie As previousley mentioned, its my job so I guess I have had time to think about it!! It is very early on and as long as your baby is warm, fed and safe they don't need a lot.

F&T

I am hoping it will help me practically. As I have 2 older children I can still have the baby close but my hands free to help them.

I was a casual babywearer with my boys and both were happy to be put down. DS1 was very chilled and was happy to sit propped up on the sofa looking around the room.

I think I'm going to buy something 'baby' once we've managed to get the move finished at weekend

Can't decide what though. Decisions decisions...

Mummy I have found babywearing excellent for the freeing of hands for doing other jobs. When baby gets bigger (as they can support themselves), I have found ring slings an excellent school run tool as you can stick them on your hip hands free... maybe I am getting a bit forward.

F&T

Can you remind me of all this in 5 months time ? :)

Lottie I have a spread sheet remind me in 5 months and I'll send it to you.

F&T

Thanks for the sling education. Um, this, though.. or when baby is crying and you need to get on with something else. Why can't you just put baby down and let him cry for a bit? I've even seen these hip chairs that a mother can wear on her hip so her bigger-than-a-newborn child can be carried around hands-free! Fucking ridiculous.

The term 'babywearer' gives me the creeps too. I don't want to wear my baby, thanks very much.

F&t that sounds fab.

Do slings pose a good option for big-titted ladies?

I ask because when I'm looking after my (soon to be) god son, I've kind of adapted to doing everything one handed when he's a bit restless. A sling would probably be a good alternative but wouldn't my boobs get in the way?

Pram you may be utterly underestimating how tough it is to leave your baby to cry not least because its annoying to hear :) also sling was always the easiest way to get DS to fall asleep - he was a bad sleeper, and if he got overtired then he would just scream for hours. Once I discovered slings, pop him in for 5 mins and he'd be snoring away, just take him out of the sling and into the cot.

Jol congrats on the good scan! Slings are fine with big boobs, but I'd suggest trying to go to a sling library so you can try a few on and see what is the most comfortable for you. My friend has enormous boobs, and she uses a Rose and Rebellion very comfortably.

Hot yay for scan, and for sleepy baby not wanting to move!

Pram - I never got on with a sling, and sometimes just put DD down, she was always happy in her bouncer or play gym which gave me time to do things like laundry or washing up, or grab a cuppa.

You'll figure out what work best for you

There's a sculls and roses design on that site! So excited!

Must start formulating a plan to get OH to think £80 is a bargain...

Jol resale value on them is around £60, so it'll only technically cost you £20 if that would work on him (that's how I justify the cost to DH and how I fund buying more - sell one, buy something else with the proceeds )

Rockchick, I know a crying baby can drive mum nuts but, equally, I've seen far too many threads where mum is stuck with a velcro baby because she never learned to let him cry. Some of these babies refuse point blank to sleep unless they're on the breast or on dad's chest etc etc. I've read of women - and marriages - being pushed to the brink by babies that will not be put down or self-sooth and I simply don't want to go there. It will be very, very tough but I fully intend to implement the Gina Ford routine. If it fails to work for me then at least I've tried.

Not sure that would fly...we're both much more prone to freecycle something like that unless we're struggling financially. I'm sure he'd know I'd either intend to keep it for next time or freecycle it and earn some good karma lol. However...I reckon as we have Christmas before the baby is due, I could see if a couple of family members fancied pooling their gift money for one. Everyone knows that this Christmas will be strictly for baby things anyway...

Who is this Gina Ford?!

Thread 7

I had a friend who swore by the Gina Ford method. Went through a stage with DD where was having problems getting her to settle, so friend lent me book.

Took one look and gave back when came across "Wake baby up at 6am..." Decided to stick with my own method as there was no way I was getting up at 6am every day! Plus also the friends I knew using that method used to be more stressed about "baby's routine" and meant they found it difficult to break out of routine such as staying out slightly longer than planned etc.

But each to their own!

You mean if the baby doesn't wake me up at 6, I have to do it voluntarily? Seriously? I get up at 5:30 for work but babies aren't in the same league! Surely the starting point should be to sleep whenever you possibly can??

I think Gina Ford's methods are too harsh. Also one size does not fit all. All babies are different and a routine that works for one will not work for another and the mother can become very stressed trying to shoe-horn their baby into a routine that doesn't suit them. It's not a choice between a harsh regime and Velcro baby. There's a lot in-between. My boys were in a nice routine that we worked put among ourselves where they were happy and content, picked up and held a lot but happy to be put down or passed around to others, and they both slept for two hours after lunch which was great for me to have that free time. Our routine evolved. It wasn't implemented or forced.