Summer, summer, summer PESH: Get in your birthing pools, it's going to be a hot one

[LadyGoneGaga]

BESH BAYBEES

dontrythisathome, girl born March 25.
Cheggers, twinz girlz, born April.
FannyPriceless, boy, born June 8.
CurlyCasper, girl, born June 24.
CUNextTuesday, boy, born June 29.
AlpinePony, boy, born 1 July.
Carrots, boy, born July.
IggyPiggy, girl, born July.
Cosmosis, boy, born Sept 5.
Backinthebox, boy, born Sept 7.
Skatergrrrl, girl, born Sept 10.
VAG, boy, born Oct 2.
Silversky, boy, born Nov 1.
SomethingSuitablyWitty, girl born Nov 2.
okiecokie, girl, born Nov 12.
Honeymoo, boy, born Nov 11.
ReginaMonologue, boy, born Nov 13.
Maswera, boy, born Dec 24.
PollyPoo, girl, born Jan 5.
MrsFC, boy, born Jan 7.
ChoChoSan, girl, born 6 Feb.
Ginhag, boy born 11 Feb.
Muser, girl, born 15 Feb.
CluckyKate, boy, born 18 Feb.
Perfect Dromedary, boy, born 23rd February.
Casserole, girl born 19th March
Medee, girl, born 26th March.
Scorpette, boy, born 21st May.
Rocketleaf, girl, born 23rd May.

UPDIFFED

Laurielou, the unmarried hussy with the "surprise" diff, due 31 May (ish).
TwinkleToes, supergluing her fanjo shut, due 20 June.
Orchid, hoping for a zen like child, due 1st July.
Ginfox, loving the new mega-boobs, due 12th July.
LadyGoneGaga, No, it's not fucking twins, due 24 July.
Ivegotmrbitey, appears to have eaten posh spice, due 27th July.
Macaroonmum, eating for 7, due Aug 6th.
Owlbooty, suddenly weeble-shaped, due 7th August.
Ocarina, there's a what in there?! due late August.
Mountie, too shy to shine, due Autumn.
Truffkin, growing a padawan, due 17th November.

Sounds like baybee has turned to me, Macca if you're getting movements high up and to the right - most likely feet. When's your next mw appt?

My baybee has started getting hiccups a couple of times a day. Is very sweet

I don't think those blinds are particularly girly, Bites. Well, maybe a little bit but even baybee boys stuff is not particularly butch, now, is it? Think will look lovely.

Am itching to get into house so I can start such things. Currently from memory the room that will be the baybee's is painted pink. Should I adopt a wait and see policy in case baybee is a girl, repaint now in a neutral. Repaint anyway because too much pink makes my eyes itch? But lounge is also yellow which is also making my eyes itch. And our bedroom will have a pink wall - similar. Which to prioritise? Or prolly should just focus on actually unpacking and put up with dubious colour schemes??

Morning laydeez. Sorry for the radio silence. We have moved house and the bastard PND has caught up with me again. My fault for running out of the ADs and forgetting to order some more. grrr. Anyway, back on the happy pills so hopefully should start feeling more human soon, although it would help if I could find my tweezers and my nail clippers. My toenails are tapping on the floor and I have a monobrow, which doesn't help my mental state!

Anyway, just popping in to check on Loz. I hope she is happily snuffling her little angel. I reckon girl, 7lb 1oz. Anyone else?

And big congrats to Twinks too, sounds like a wonderful birth story.

Scorps I posted a little pressie for MrT last week - not heard from you, but hope you got it? If not, I will have to get on to the post office. Hope it was not lost though as I fort it was lush!

BB awake now so gotta run. Will check in for Bug news later. Bitchslaps and tequila for all.

Nice blinds, Bitey.

My close friend who was due at the same time as me (delivered on my due date) called her girl a very slightly different spelling of one of the names on my list. As it was, it didn't matter, as she was definitely what we named her.

Wish there was news from Lozzles but I know all too well what it's like to be zonked recovering in hossie and besides, there's a BAYBEE to snuffle and squee over and gaze at in wonder! Hope Family Loz is doing well XX Can't wait for details and pix.

Ooooh, am going to send TYF to check the mail, Pol! Thankyouthankyouthankyou!!! 'Cos we live in a flat, we have to walk round the block to an outside mailbox to get mail. I'm still not well enough to go and TYF keeps forgetting/not being arsed. EXCITEMENTS! So sorry the PND has flared up again - am sure it is just the stress of the move exacerbating things; would be nightmare enough without a couple of little ones, you poor thing. Come sit on my knee and we can clack our hideous witchy toenails together :)

LOVE those blinds, Bitey. I think they're just right, not girly nor nuffink.

Loving Will Scarlet TYF has the same surname as a couple of famous people with weird/awful first names, so any time people were nosy about future names, we just offered up one of those with a straight face. Or one of the 5 names that rhyme with my surname :)

I haz mastitis in my right nork. Never rains but it pours, etc., etc.

Get thee to the doctor's Score you will need AB's before it turns nasty. Have no practical advice as have never had it but look on Kelly mom here

Sorry to hear the PND is back, Pol. Hopefully the happy pills will kick back in again soon. MiniG has been putting your birfing ball to good use by the way. His favourite game at the moment is to balance on it while we roll him around, laughing hysterically and occasionally tickling him.

Scorps definitely mastitis? I had a blocked duct a few times whcih made my boob feel like it was going to explode but lots of hot towels and hand massaging put in straight...oh and forcing myself to feed from that boob
If you feel like shit it's probably mastitis, if it's just the boob, it might not be

thanks for the sympathies all, sure I will feel good again soon. Was my own stupid fault - I ran out, forget to get more and thought 'oh well, I feel fine, so maybe I don't need them'. And then moved house! Dullard. I actually feel better for realising what was going on (had been snappy and impatient with Boo and TG and generally feeling kind of numb and joyless) and I've had a very productive morning shifting things around in the kitchen. Cos obvs it is much better to spend time re-arranging the stuff I've already unpacked, rather than unpack some more, or actually get my clothes from the floor into a wardrobe.

So sorry the health probs are not improving post birth Score. Surely you have had more than your fair share of shit now ffs? I hope TYF is taking good care of you and I'm sure the gorgeous MrT more than makes up for the shiteness, but even so - wishing you a super speedy recovery from here on.

Where IS loz. I can't concentrate on anything. I went outside to pick up dog poo (oh the glamour) and decided instead to move the garden furniture from the little courtyard at the back to the big grassy bit across the drive. I luff my new house. It is Hoooge old farmhouse. We could never afford to buy it, not even if we saved for 20 years, but because of its run-down state and the fact it is in the arse end of nowhere, the rent is dirt cheap. I now have a Rayburn and I am dying to get to grips with baking cakes in it but I have about 11 pairs of curtains to make before winter so I reckon I'd better concentrate on that first.

Glad the ball is getting some use GG. Boo used to perch on it and roll herself around, holding on the back of the sofa. Then the dog would try and eat it!

Gah, BB awake again. I think she is teething. The strange child seems to be cutting an eye tooth first. Ouchy.

No news of lozzer? she must be knee deep in snuffling and baby love by now :-)

pol sorry to hear the PND is back. Sounds like you have a lot on your plate at the mo. Hope things settle down and the rrrrugs do the biz.

ouchscorps hope it's just a blocked duct not full on mastitis as macca says. Suppose the one advantage of all this expressing is my boobs are getting massaged at every opportunity!!

lady hope the house shizz all goes smoothly from now on. Love your image of miniG on the ball (sounds a bit like TB when we first got ours :D)

Lovely blinds bitesize not girlie at all. Biteybach is a lucky baybee. Loving the tree/bird/owl obsession that seems rife in the deli.

Oh Pol, the pressie was there and it is truly AMAZE!!! I absolutely luff it and your card was so gorgeous too. I want to snog you even more than usual (which is already bloody loads). Makes me so angry you're suffering with PND because you bring so much happiness to everyone else Hope the ADs kick in vvv soon, my treasure xx

Cheers for the advice guys, I think it is a blocked duct not mastitis - I stoopidly didn't know there was degrees of badness and thought mastitis covered all blockage-type pains but have read up now and understand better. Can't see a Dr until Tuesday and have rung NCT BFing numbers both local and national and there's no-one to speak to for advice and same for La Leche, hmmmmph. Weird thing is, after feeding the R nipple-end will go white for a min and be agonising then go back to pink and be fine for a few mins then back again and keep doing this on and off for 10 mins; v odd!

I wanna know if my Mystic Meg prediction that Bug is a pink flava was correct!

PS Every single congrats card from TYF's side of the family has spelt my name wrong in it. Was it very wrong to snap in a hormonal meltdown 'why are your family educationally subnormal?'? I have become a total bitch since giving birth (as opposed to merely a frequent one, previously)!

So glad you like it Scropey! Can't wait to see pics of MrT wearing it... although I think I bought 6-12 months didn't I? Might be a while then. Aw fanku, you just mad me have leaky eyes, you are proper lush.

Lots of hot flannels and massage for you then Score. When you say the nip goes white after a feed, have you checked the shape of it? Is it a bit flatter on one side? I used to get that a lot with BB - she wouldn't open her mouth wide enough and even though it might have felt like a good latch, the HV told me if the nip was white/flat or misshapen, then it meant latch was bad.

I'm struggling to see how your name could be spelled any other way, Scorps. Warm bath, and boob massage, or get a comb and work at the duct that way.

Sorry i cross-posted with Polly earlier, sorry to hear the PND has struck back my love, hope the pills sort it out. Your new house sounds lovely though.

Bitey - those blinds are lush, and not too girly. The Foxcub's bedroom has an underwater theme - smiley fishes and whales and dolphins and shizzle - and so is mostly blue. But if it is a girl it wouldn't make a difference. Girly stuff is all teddies and love-hearts and butterflies

LadyG I would have to erase the pink before I did anything else - except maybe unpack the kettle. And it will be easier to decorate before you've unpacked.

Scorps I think you're still ok to be angry at your ILs for misspelling your name. Preggo hormones continue to be a valid excuse for several years months after the birth. Tis the law. Hope the boob pain settles asap.

Have just got home after 2 hours in Ikea, doing battle with other preggos and mums with toddlers. Only spent £90, and didn't end up with too much crap-I-don't-need-but-it-was-such-a-bargain-I-bought-it-anyway. Now enjoying cup of tea and endorphin-rush. Luffly.

Hope Lozza is ok.

I am going to paint a beach and seaside on the wall of Owlet's nursery :) I do like all this nursery planning. I need to find some seaside curtains I think and someone is going to make me a mobile with tiny yachts on it. Ginny I too boak at the girly pink stuff. Even if I was having a girl I would definitely still be painting seaside pictures.

Macca the doc today at my appt asked me where I felt the most kicks (right; up under ribs) and decided based on that plus some prodding that Owlet was head down - this does sound therefore like the MiniMac has shifted (hurrah!) so hopefully if he has he will stay put from now on and not faff about further. You must be awfully bored of staring at your floor tiles by now

Scorps Yow. That sounds most uncomfortable. I hope that you manage to get some help from somewhere; tis bloody useless that things like this are not allowed to happen on a Friday (and yet they always do) when nobody is around to assist. And YADNBU to think your inlaws are being fuckwits. Mine still fail to remember my name regularly but at least when they do remember it they spell it right.

Hope you are feeling better soon, lovely, definitely NOT the moment to run out of happy pills. Moving house is hard enough already esp. with two little 'uns.

You biatches. I haz made chocolate custard muffins. They are fucking ACE. And I made blueberry cake last week. To anyone who knows me this is nothing short of a terrifying personality shift. I like baking! Who knew??

I have a long-awaited hospital appointment on Monday. If they sort me out I'll hopefully manage to hang out here a bit more often (stop groaning at the back!) I may even actually move some of my half empty gin bottles domestic godess paraphernalia into the CRESH at some point. And write my 'NO I AM NOT PISSING MYSELF MY WATERS HAVE FUCKING BROKEN!!!!' birth story. Perhaps.

That was yo biatches. Twatting autocorrect.

Both work gin not to worry. hope the medics sort you reet out. We can swap leakage stories if you like. I should have bought shares in kotex is all I'm saying.

Gin are they muffins with chocolately custard? Or Chocolate muffins with regular custard? Either way they sound awesome. Gimme.

Ta rocket but it's actually nowt to do with me nethers. I must remember to keep my pants on when I go in. Can imagine taking all clothes off lower body and climbing on bed just from force of habit. 'what do mean, everyone that works in every hospital wants a good look at my minge!!'

foxy you sort of make a custard before mixing the in flour etc. So there is no actual custard but they are super moist and squishy and...oh fuck it I may have to eat another one.

Bloody hell they sound amazing! Is it the ribs need sorting gin? or did they sort themselves once the pressure was off. Tell me to eff off if being too nosey. I am sure a good look at your foof would be a pleasure and a privilege for any medic, they should count emselves lucky.

Nah. Ribs are still wrong, but not too bad at the mo. It's a head thing. Doc thinks it's a salivary gland stone. Have had 2 before, though that gland was removed so I dunno. Maybe. Get a lovely swollen jaw with a permanent 'punched in the face' feeling. Thought it was an abcess. It isn't. it really fucking hurts, though I am on v strong painkillers (have been for weeks)

Stupid fucking body. Anyway. At least I have the appt.

Sorry you are leaky! How you doing in general? Surviving? The little buggers try to break your spirit at the beginning... It gets easier :)

The leaking was prior to birth. 2 days of leaky waters. What they dont tell you is the clever womble keeps topping the stuff up as you leak. Suppose this is a good thing so you don't end up with a raisin baby but it's a bit disconcerting at the time, the sheer quantityof the stuff!!

I'm not so bad, been having a mare feeding the little minx (more than the usual problems as in she WONT take the boob) and was having a bad tine over it to begin with but have kind of got it under control now by setting up the equivalent of a dairy farm in our front room. Plus she has a bit of a 'heart condition' although I think it's likely to fix itself. Hossie dont seem worried about it if the mid July consuktant appointment is anything to go by.

Head things sounds bloody ouchy gin :-( not what you need with a newborn in tow. (or at any time really)

Ah yes, get you now. I am such a dippy twat. I was leaking for fucking days!! from my first day of mat leave. Hurrah. But no fucker believed me, despite shining floodlights up my foof etc. Took 3 hospital visits before someone said 'oh I think your waters have broken'.

No shit, Sherlock.

Sorry you having tough time with feeding. Even the 'normal' stuff can be bastard hard, so it must be really stressful for you. Glad they think the heart thing will be all fine, hope they can tell you it is sorted soon.

It's the 3 year old that's the challenge matey! Am just looking forward to getting it sorted, feeling like someone is drilling into my cheekbone makes me a tad grouchy