DH using his phone when driving FFS

[Yourestressedagain]

Ive said multiple times to my DH that he should not be using his phone when driving. Repeatedly I have said this. He says he’s just changing a song or whatever and I get really annoyed with him. I’ve said he could kill someone and he needs to pack it in.

Today he rang me very distressed saying he was “changing a song” on his phone on a dual carriageway and a man in the passenger seat of the car next to him was recording him and shaking his head.

I was mortified and said that it’s totally irresponsible and I’ve told him for years to stop it. I don’t even let our child get in the car with him on his own if I can help it.

he was crying and said he’ll be reported to the police. I’ve no sympathy but worried that the police with knock at our door?? What’s the likelihood of this? I’m annoyed that he’s continually broken the law, got caught and now put out family in a position where he could be arrested at our house.

he’s moping and not talking to me now. Aibu to have been so unsupportive of him?

My neighbours young child died when she was hiy by someone driving while using their phone. She was 12 years old. There are no excuses, ever.

What did he expect to happen? Ignore him. He caused the whole situation.

He's an idiot. Hopefully he'll receive six points and a Fine. He won't be arrested, surely the process is that he'll receive a NIP (I think that's what it's called).

I think it’s 6 points on your license and a fine

Well I hope this is the lesson he needed that luckily hasn’t involved the death of someone else.

tell him to stop sulking and grow up.

Nobody needs to touch their phone to skip to the next song. It's either a button on the steering wheel or the central control panel. Maybe he'll stop being a blithering idiot now. Don't tell him he won't get arrested - he won't be but he deserves to stew.

Yanbu. What's he's done isn't just idiotic it's highly dangerous and there's no excuse at all for his repeated reckless behaviour.

He needs to understand the fact that he’s now potentially been caught doesn’t make him the victim here. He’s upset because he’s facing the consequences of his own actions and ignoring you for his stupidity.

He might well be arrested and he deserves it. If he already has points on his license, he may well lose it. I wouldn't extend any sympathy to him at all.

Your DH is a selfish idiot and it’s the biggest ick ever that you’ve told him repeatedly to stop and he hasn’t. Actually, it’s the biggest ick he would even do this at all to begin with!!!

I was blue lighted to hospital and had over a year’s worth of physio after an idiot on his phone parked his transit van in the back of my car while I was stationary at a junction.

I wish the penalties for phone use were harsher. I hope your husband has a plan for how he’s going to continue working and contributing to family life when he loses his licence. Or goes to prison for killing someone.

It's awful.
I've caught my ex husband out using his phone in the car when he's been driving our DC.

Crying?

I'd be absolutely furious with him! I presume the police will trace him via his number plate and he'll get a fine and points on his licence.

He’s not talking to you? What do you mean, ‘unsupportive’, wtf does he expect you to do? You’ve been warning him for years!

Yanbu, of course.

£200 and 6 points, plus the embarrassment of court summons (or police at the door) is a very cheap penalty in comparison to the jail sentence he could have got if he crashed.

He FAFO’d and hopefully this is his lesson. YANBU!!! He needs to grow up

There are no excuses whatsoever. It's been illegal for a long time now, and if anyone isn't aware, then they live under a rock.
I fully support heavy penalties for this, in the hope that a tough lesson might drive it home (deliberate pun 👍)

I’m not sticking up for the driver in any way or making excuses, but I know several people who can’t change songs on their phone by touching a button on the steering wheel or central console. For example, my husband has to connect his phone to the car via a USB lead and can only change tracks by touching the phone.

Absolutely this, mine is the same.

I wouldn't do it on a motorway though. Just flick it over to the radio till it was safe to stuff around.

I doubt anything will happen to him, unfortunately.

How awful of him to keep doing this very dangerous thing, for no reason beyond selfishness.

Show the selfish man what people think of his behaviour. It is unforgivable to be a risk to the lives of others so blatently.

Sensible drivers are risking accidents anyway, without fiddling with phones.

One of the worst things I see on the school run are mothers who repeatedly have their phone in their hand texting as they are pulling out after dropping off.

It’s unreal because in an area where children are still crossing and traversing the space, they are flicking their eyes up and down while piloting a 2 tonne vehicle.

I tried to speak to someone once about it and you can predict what I got in return.

The worst part is, I don’t think 6 points is enough.

I would favour an immediate 1 month ban and the points endorsement. What you’d then get is people actually recognising driving is a privilege and not a right.

When driving accidents happen in this country, the fatalism presented by defendants is shocking. It is as if all the remorse that pours out is enough to mitigate the fact they drove carelessly and knowingly so while in charge of a heavy vehicle.

Your DH is very unreasonable. I would want to see a driving ban because I don’t think people pay attention otherwise. There are too many arrogant entitled driver in the UK who think their licence is a human right and they can do what they want after they’ve paid tax and insurance.

You are under no obligation to be supportive of illegal and immoral behaviour! What does he want you to do about it ffs?

Good! He deserves it! Sorry to sound harsh but it’s still the biggest killer on our roads and I wish the police would do more. Unfortunately as a professional driver I see individuals on the phone constantly!

I want my DH to be caught using his phone while driving, he changes songs, messes with the sat nav etc. I get really cross about it but he still does it. It would be a good lesson for him to get a fine/ban and I would have zero sympathy for him.

The video may not even make it to the police - or he could have been pretending to film him.

Either way, give that man a medal! He has just given your husband a real wake up call.

As for him moping and not talking to you, take it as a sign that he is preoccupied with his actions and potential consequences and ignore it.