AIBU to feel uneasy about a teacher commenting on my daughter's eyes?

[Kickinthenostalgia]

For context dd14 is in year 9, she’s very much all for her friends, always stuck in the middle, never starts arguments, she’s never in trouble, never had detention, most of the teachers love her, although she has a few boy best friends she’s not really into relationships just yet. Got a call today from the school, immediately my backs up because usually the only time they call me is when she’s in the medical room. No it’s a teacher singing DD’s praises, saying how she’s a pleasure to teach, etc etc. he mentioned he’s a new teacher at the school and as a father didn’t get feedback for his daughter who has just left so wanted to do it for his promising students.
so I was just talking to my mum about it, and she said to me is that the same teacher that told dd she had really nice eyes.
of course I’m like what you talking about, she never said anything. I laughed it off at first but the more I think about it, it’s a bit creepy. No? My mum defo wasn’t impressed and I’m surprised dd didn’t tell me considering she tells me everytime a teacher so much as shouts at her class. Obviously I don’t know the full story as she’s at school. I know I’ll need to keep an eye on this. I don’t know who it is, but just a bit surprised. I’m not being unreasonable to think this is slightly creepy right?

Some teachers make a point of making positive calls sometimes so that the well behaved students don’t feel overlooked. In some classes, it becomes a real motivator and nice reward, e.g. which student will get the positive call on a Friday. Some schools have a policy for it, e.g. one positive call a week.

Comment on the student’s eyes does not sound appropriate, however, unless there’s a context we don’t know about. Example - child is crying because someone has made a nasty comment about their eyes, and the teacher says innocuously to reassure ‘Oh, how unpleasant. That’s not ok, and you’ve got lovely eyes.’ I wouldn’t do it myself, but have definitely come across lots of well-meaning but perhaps in today’s context ill-advised examples like this.

It does sound odd and very unprofessional.

I do it twice a week and email a bunch of others. Maybe it's your kid that may be an issue, but it's very frequent to ring parents to tell them about their children achievements in most schools I have worked at.

That being said, it is a bit of a strange remark, I dont think it has to be something super creepy off the bat, but Id definitely monitor.

My school has an internal policy we need to ring or email parents of a number of kids. I have been doing that since I started teaching 20+ years ago. You dont even have to be an overenthusiastic young person to do this, it's genuinely a thing we are told to build up good relationships with parents.

Havent bothered to read the updates, have you?

We’re told to do 3 “praise phone calls” per week. It’s not that unusual.

What fresh hell is this? 3 'praise' phone calls a week, and 'flattery' emails and the like.

Things have changed since mine were at school. - early 2010s. None of this was ever a thing - ever.

One woman on my Facebook page (lives in my village) has a son in secondary school who is 12. Yesterday she posted a photograph of a short handwritten letter/note that a teacher had sent 'Well done to Jayden for listening really well in science, he has been a really good boy today. All the best ... Mr Keaton.' with a gold star sticker on it like you'd give to a 5 year old.

This is the third thing like this that Jayden has had this term. (So in 3 weeks.)
It's so fucking weird. I'm cringing every time I see it. This shit (commenting on their work,) was always kept for end of term reports. Not a weekly note to the parents for them to photograph and put on bastard Facebook!

Why is this happening? Don't teachers have enough shit to deal with, and work to do, without this fucking nonsense?!

Yes it's weird. As someone who works in a school. If I witnessed a male teacher saying a child had nice eyes I'd report it.

Plenty of teachers do that at my DC's school (phone to sing praises). I think it's lovely that it's not just negative interactions.

When did this start though? Mine left early 2010s and this was never a thing then - or before - at any school I have ever know of.

What a waste of teacher/teaching resources!

Things have changed since mine were at school. - early 2010s. None of this was ever a thing - ever.

and

When did this start though? Mine left early 2010s and this was never a thing then - or before - at any school I have ever know of.

I had dc at secondary between 2005 and 2019
It was definitely a thing then.

#Newsflash# Different school have different policies and different cultures.