Was anyone else not ferried around as a child to various clubs?

[Imgonnaleaveyou58]

I have one sibling and we were driven to a trampolining club one evening a week by our parents, which we appreciated. These days kids seem to have eye-wateringly expensive hobbies on 4 or 5 evenings a week which they're driven all over the place for? It's important to partake in hobbies and sporting activities but I think the kids are spoilt tbh.

No kid needs to be taken to clubs every single night of the week, they're allowed to be bored/at home/entertain themselves sometimes and parents are allowed to spend money on themselves and do things for them.
I just think it's all gone mad.

I think the difficulty is that if these were provided in school, there would be less of the ferrying around. I grew up in a country where participating in sports and other activities such as debating was all part of the school day and not all required the additional cost except for the uniform for some. We often had a longer school day finishing at 4/5pm. The sports was also very competitive going up to county level. These schools were not independent schools and were government schools. Perhaps the parents are doing it so that their children have these opportunities? I think my parents had it easier as they would come to competitions which were often at weekends or later on in the afternoon when they could or just collected at the end of the day. I believe independent schools are similar.

I wasn’t. We went to Brownies (60p a week) and a 5 minute walk away. And Sunday school. That was it. Partly because there was no money (my mum made damn sure she was unemployable and we were on benefits) and partly because I don’t think she could be arsed.

I spend most of my time and money ferrying my three children to activities. Think we might have one weekend free until Christmas.. I appreciate some people think we are mad, but they are happy, healthy and engaged teenagers who know about hard work and have passions. My eldest competes at an international level and their sport has offered them numerous opportunities and a university scholarship. If children are interested and want to pursue their passions and parents can suppprt that, why wouldn’t you?

We weren't ferried around, parents couldn't afford a car.
We only did activities if we found something ourselves and able to walk there. My brother loved horse riding, there was a stables near us and they were very happy for local children to go along, very easy going, and the children got a chance to ride, not lessons but taught basics.
I went ice skating thanks to a local girl who had lessons and encouraged me to go with her, no paid lesson. I hired the skates.
Other that that just Sunday School, apart from loving to sing we didn't really do much activity, ie crafts, but it was sociable, there was a very large number.

I think I would have loved to win a badge or two at something, it may have built my confidence, as a lot of my school reports at secondary school say I lacked self confidence. I think I may have liked a bit more adult input too, gently though as I was quite quiet and could hold back. I think I would have loved to do some D of E, had I been the right age. It came too late for me.
I am just wondering who these wonderful people are who run these clubs/activities. There was a dance school a few miles from us and that was her business/income. If children want to do them, its lovely there are more opportunities.

I am 48 and I did ballet from 6 to 10 every Wednesday. No swimming as we lived in the sticks and the nearest swimming pool was miles away. We did cross country skiing because we lived near mountains and there was snow back then. We had our own skis. Apart from that, nothing. We were playing outside all the time though. We had so much countryside to explore around us. Without adult supervision. My children do swimming, one used to do drums but has stopped as he's not into.it anymore. One does after school clubs like yoga and gymnastics but it'smore playing around tbh. I wished they did more but my kids are the reserved type and hate group activities. We always suggest and encourage but it's met with a flat "no". The youngest would like to do horse riding but it's so expensive that I think we can only stretch to one lesson a month. It's not always the parents 😅

I was so lucky my dad did most of the ferrying!
Basketball at least 2 times a week plus one match a week in season.
Hockey 2 times a week plus 2 matches a week during season.
Cricket once a week plus matches in season.
At various points tennis lessons, judo, squash and swimming. Fortunately my brother also did half the sports I did so we went together for those.
Also various evening pickups from school for rugby, cricket and hockey.
Honestly I didn't appreciate it at the time, although my dad did start playing the sports too so as to not get bored!

I have a fair few children and they all do one club a week- two of the girls through school.

I always say to them they can do more if they like but they all say no. Think they're happy at home.

I think it's got a bit ridiculous really. Children these days don't learn how to entertain themselves, and don't learn the street smarts we used to have as kids, because they aren't allowed to play out.

I was in the Girl's Brigade from about the age of 9, and used to go to Sunday school at the same church. I would walk there on my own or with the other kids in the street as my mum wouldn't take me as I had a younger sibling and she didn't drive, and not many people had cars anyway. When I was about 11 I starred going to a youth club, and again I just took myself there and met friends. I walked to school with friends from the age of 9, which was a mile away.

There was definitely no ferrying about! Everyone walked to school or local clubs, which would only be once or twice a week.

We structured our own time the rest of the week and played out with friends.

That's a weird conclusion to leap to. Even with a dance class a night (her choice) DD has ample time for climbing trees and mucking about with friends too.

I only know one family such as the OP describes and I’ve often suspected it’s driven by the parents wishes rather than the child’s. Most children I know have typically one hobby and maybe an after-school club which is either free or low cost with no additional transport costs as they’re already there. And at secondary school, they’re more interested in meeting up with friends in their free time.

We have children in activities that they attend several times a week, as well as games / competitions / camps where we have travel. They attend this much as they excel at what they do and have joined elite teams, including national level. We don’t mind the travel as they genuinely love what they do and, despite the usual teenager traits, they are grateful and are fully aware of what we give up regarding time and costs.

This also doesn’t stop them meeting up with friends out and about and they have taken full advantage of the free bus travel over summer.

If they decided that this wasn’t right for them then we would never force them, but I would never make them stop either when they’ve got amazing opportunities in front of them purely so I didn’t have to be taxi driver.

I was primary age in the 90s & did loads. Swimming lessons, ballet, music lessons, choir. There were lots of free/cheap clubs run by teachers after school - art, football, netball, cricket, recorders, choir.

Women rang things like ballet/tap in church halls for pin money and classes seemed to have more kids in which keeps costs down, & fewer mums worked long hours so were more available to help at brownies etc. Swimming lessons were only ever at the public leisure centre, which was local council run, and were cheap.

I remember most people doing lots (it was a state school in a lower middle class 70s new town), loads of people did brownies/cubs, gym, badgers, football. Music lessons at school were heavily subsidised by the county council so were quite affordable and the recorder group & choir were free.

My kids do very similar things to me but its vastly more expensive!

Im also in my 50s, went to sunday's school, Catholic youth group, swimming pool, guides etc. But was never driven there. Mainly as my parents didn't drive . Was expected to make my own way to places as did the vast majority of the other kids unless they lived really out in the dticks

I'm 62 but did lots of activities that my parents took me to

I am 46 and me and my sibling did lots of clubs as kids, dancing most nights, theatre group at least once a week, badminton, piano lessons after school, violin in school. Rarely had a free night and I loved it. .

My DC did lots too but it was always their choice. Most of their stuff was quite reasonable on a monthly basis, kit was sometimes expensive. Tennis was the worst, was hundreds a month just for a few hours each and the constant pressure for them to do more hours, at one point they said my youngest should be doing 12-16 hrs a week as he was good, I was like absolutely not, would have definitely been the cost of a mortgage, and he was a bit lazy so never would have worked hard enough at it. Some of the kids there only did half days at school and played tennis in the afternoons, must have cost a fortune.

Brownies start at 8 don't they

What sports do your children do? How much time does it take you? Is that not all you need to worry about?

Really??

I'd have definitely thought it performative, but then again I was a full time working single parent whose kids did do stuff. Although it wasn't regular ferrying arohbd

I did a few activities and hated all of them! This probably influences my very low clubs parenting style. No doubt my kids will say they didn’t do enough and so will do loads with their kids and the cycle will continue 😂

I wasn't taken to anything. My older sister did ballet and other dancing. We didn't have a lot of money and it was expensive and time consuming so I was just told I couldn't do anything like that. I was also reminded I'm not very good at most things so what was the point 😂
My younger sister was allowed to try a lot of different things but never stuck anything out.

I'm 38 and I do think there were less clubs then, I grew up in a not very affluent area which may have added to that. There's alot of pressure nowadays that your kids have these experiences and opportunities, what others do is more visible I guess.

I did do brownies and gymnastics, but mostly remember that as my dad frequently forgot to pick us up!

We did lots of activities and got ferried around but no abroad holidays and basics at home. I think it’s better than just being on iPads ???

good in winter UK.

I'm mid 40s now and I was out most nights growing up, some my choice, some my parents, some of which required ferrying, some of which didnt. None were very expensive though. Although running got more expensive as I got older as I trained and raced more frequently. Sometimes races could be a long way away but we had a camper van and as my parents were both teachers, sometimes we went friday after school and came back sunday so made a weekend of it. My youngest does scouts and sometimes goes to a local youthgroup both of which require a bit of ferrying but Im happy to do it. I also expect that he will sign up to as many afterschool clubs that he can, and as winter approaches that may require a little more ferrying (as if its too dark Id rather pick him up rather than him walk). None of these cost much (apart from when he goes to an international scout jamboree 😂 and even that wasnt a bad price compared to school residentials) My eldest is now 18 and just has monthly membership to the local bouldering centre so he can go as often as he likes. He's had it since he was 14 and I used to ferry him often 2 or 3 nights a week (I'd rather take him and pick him up at night at that age especially in the winter) even though its only about a 25 minute walk. He started walking last year. Both did swimming when they were younger, that was by far the most expensive 'hobby' and required ferrying but I insisted as its a life skill (I'm thankful neither of them particularly enjoyed it and wanted to stop as soon as they were allowed 😂). Im quite thankful neither of mine took an interest in any sport or hobby that cost too much, although my youngest did ask about a theatre group which wasn't cheap (thankfully it was the same night as scouts and that won)

I’m mid-40s and did a fair few activities throughout childhood. Brownies (then Guides), piano lessons, tap lessons, etc. My kids do a lot less (but that could be because they’re only 7 and 5 😆)

i didn’t do any clubs. I am nearly 50.. all my friends did clubs. I ran when I got in from school from around age 12. Just to get out and do something.

In comparison my 3 all at piano. 1 additional at Drums other additional at Singing lesson. gymnastics, swimming for 1 with tennis. Tennis takes over 5 days for 3
of them as they are heavily involved in this sport. Hockey 2 sessions a week for 2 of them. Honestly they have tried years of dancing and gymnastics for other two (didn’t stick) and also did ski lesson until level 6. Writing all this sounds mental, honestly they aren’t spoiled and v grateful for all their hobbies. I wish I had the same opportunities but I am not bitter in anyway about it. Different lifestyle and incomes.

I honestly enjoy all the clubs and sports, met lovely people. However I won’t dress it up, it’s exhausting some nights and the winter is tougher. By week 5 of the summer I am craving the routine again. Also to add we both have the flexibility to pick up from 4pm at school to facilitate this. My parents didn’t have that flexibility.