Was anyone else not ferried around as a child to various clubs?

[Imgonnaleaveyou58]

I have one sibling and we were driven to a trampolining club one evening a week by our parents, which we appreciated. These days kids seem to have eye-wateringly expensive hobbies on 4 or 5 evenings a week which they're driven all over the place for? It's important to partake in hobbies and sporting activities but I think the kids are spoilt tbh.

No kid needs to be taken to clubs every single night of the week, they're allowed to be bored/at home/entertain themselves sometimes and parents are allowed to spend money on themselves and do things for them.
I just think it's all gone mad.

I'm almost 40, but 'playing out in the street' isn't as much of a thing now (I understand the world has changed), in my parents' days in the 60s and 70s it'll have been even more likely.

I;m not going to lie, it does make me sort of bittersweet and sad to read threads like that. My parents thought anything that wasn't studying was stupid "why play instruments, you aren't going to be a musician are you?" and never spent a single penny on after school clubs or holidays for us. "When you have your own money, you can go wherever you want / do as much art/drama/music as you want". I know that that was their choice to make. But it's hard to be a beginner at all things creative/sporty when you're an adult and a lot of adults that do those things have been doing it since childhood/adolescence. There is a lot less available for working adults if you don't live in a big city.

I don't know how to feel when parents around me complain about the cost and time spent ferrying their kids around. Part of me is like "but you're allowing them to do something amazing" and part of me is like "... you know it's optional, right? My parents opted fully out..."

It's just a shame.

I understand that, I think parents can still be supportive and encouraging without having to drain their own bank account and sacrifice every single evening. Kids can do hobbies/learn things at home too, they don't need a taxi driver on demand.

Well I'm in my 50s and I went to Guides, Sunday school plus Thursday church youth group, various different iterations of swimming lessons, Duke of Edinburgh, and I had piano lessons at home. My sisters had a similar schedule with dance, band practice etc. We had very little money but most of those things didn't cost much, but they did involve being driven around. We still managed to spend a lot of time at home as well.
Oh and I had a job I had to be driven to!

I had brownies but that was literally at the end of our road but that was it.
I don't recall any of my school friends or nighbours going to any kind of club in primary school, at secondary there were a few that went to a swimming club , that was fairly close to the school afaik most kids took themselves there then home.

Both my parents worked so we were home alone until they got in from about 8/9 yrs old .

I can see both sides. I went to brownies and then guides as a child but desperately wanted to go to dance classes. My parents did find a cheaper movement type group for me to go to but I still remember being a bit sad I never got to do the tap or modern dance lessons at the dance school I wanted to go to (my parents simply couldn't afford it).
I can see why some parents therefore do encourage their children to do multiple activities as maybe they are giving them the opportunities they didn't get to do.
My own kids do scouts and karate and because of the age gap do these clubs together so we aren't constantly taking one to something. DS has never been that sporty so never wanted to go to football and while I offered DD the chance to go to dance she was too shy and didn't want to. Both have had music lessons but neither have really committed to it.
Oh seeing another post about learning things at home, we do all go to a craft group together and DD particularly goes on to reproduce what is made in class.

The schools had clubs on you could stay the hour for then walk/bus home a bit later. Agree it doesn't need to cost much and it's up to the parent, but people act like it's some sort of neglect if they're not out at judo one night, swimming the next, piano the following, football games every Saturday morning and so on.

I’m in my 60s. I was taken to a local children’s/youth club once a week, church or Sunday school most weeks. That was it.

I saw someone elsewhere post that they could've now paid off their mortgage with what they'd paid out for one particular club.

I find the ferried around part of this a bit odd. My son does lots of after school clubs for things like chess, coding and drama- are you counting those? It's just a later pick up at school so doesn't take much extra from us and the cost is reasonable. He asked to sign up for these. Then we do take him to swimming out of school (we insist) and cubs (again one we wanted him to do as both me and my husband were guides/ scouts in our own youth0. My husband is one of these people that is happiest when he's got things on that get him out the house and whereas I am a homebody I think my son might take after him.

We didn't have a car so no ferrying here, I went to one dance class a week that was a very short walk away. I hated it and stopped going as soon as I could.

I'm in my 40's and at various points did Brownies, swimming, gymnastics then trampolining, keyboard and language lessons plus other instruments in school time. Usually 2 evenings a week and often a Saturday morning.

My DD does activities 2 evenings a week. I like this balance for us - some activity time and some down time. Even on activity evenings she has an hour and a half when she gets home from school to chill and have tea before she goes out, so certainly not rushed about.

We're lucky we live in a cul-de-sac and one of her school friends lives on the same street so they do play outside together a fair bit. Just as I did as a child.

I do agree activities every night would be a bit much but I don't know any Primary school kids that do more than 3 and that usually includes one weekend one.

My mum told me when I was 12 that any extracurricular activities I signed up for would be accessed by public transport! It was London so possible, with a well lit route from the bus stop.

I'm 47 and was driven around to clubs by my dad as a child. We weren't in poverty or anything, but lived in a tiny house, had a proper old banger car and didn't go on holidays abroad

I’m 54 (brother older) and my mum or dad took me and my brother to Judo lessons once a week (30 mile round trip) and me and my brother also did BMX competitions (when it was popular the first time round) and we were taken to endless competitions all over the country. To be fair, we were actually very good at that and were paid to do it in the end.

I am 56 and never went to any clubs. I was desperate to be a majorette and to play the flute.

I did brownies and then Guides. I don't think that was any different to my friends, a couple of them did have piano lessons but that was considered unusual. My dad worked long hours and my mum did drive but only journeys she thought absolutely essential as she hated it.

My mum basically chose our hobby for us - piano. I am grateful to have learnt and still play to a high standard now (and enjoy it), but I do feel wistful for all the things I asked to try and wasn’t allowed. Recognise the ‘when you have your own money’ line from a pp above. We didn’t even learn to swim (learnt as an adult). I’ve tried to let my dc try out lots of things - it hasn’t always been practical and they definitely haven’t always stuck with it, but I’m glad they’ve been able to try.

edit - typo

I wasn’t ever taken to any extra curriculars. I went to breakfast club and after school club and my dad took me swimming at the outdoor pool in the summer if he finished early sometimes.

I find the idea of small kids attending so many clubs and activities quite depressing.

My parents never took me to any clubs at all. We were on a low income and they couldn't have afforded it, and also did wfh in the afternoons and evenings so couldn't have spent the time to do it. I think I missed out on a lot by not having interests outside of school and thr chance to develop skills in music, dance and other activities I would have loved to do. As an adult I have taken some hobbies up and really noticed a difference in people who had done a bit as kids compared to someone like me who only started as an adult.

My dcs do a lot of activities, one every day. We can afford it easily and some of them are straight after school on their school site, so I don't ferry them around, just collect them an hour later. They are much better swimmers than I ever was (I only ever had school swimming lessons), and having an amazing ear for music thanks to early kodaly musicianship, and confidence that comes from drama and excellent coordination and team skills from netball, amongst other things. It's hard work sometimes making the effort to take them but I'm pleased they have those opportunities, and it doesn't stop me also spending lots of money on myself too.

I left school with the sixth form of 1984.

I really don't remember there even being the plethora of after school clubs that there are now. I went to Brownies and then to Girl Guides for a while, both of which I hated and was glad to leave in the end. I think my parents felt that I ought to be doing something. They weren't really that pushy about it but did encourage it, so I felt I should go.

I wasn't sporty so didn't even look for sports clubs. I wouldn't have been interested.

I'm 40, I did ice skating, piano, horse riding, swimming, brownies etc. I had something on pretty much every day. Some of those things turned out to be my biggest passions, I coached skating through uni and still absolutely love it today. I'm eternally grateful to my parents for all those opportunities and give my kids the same.

I don't think it's necessary but I also don't think it's spoilt, and it's certainly not a new thing. Plenty of kids at school were just as busy as me 30 years ago.

I'm in my 60s. I walked by myself to and from piano lessons once a week and my mother took my siblings and me swimming once a week. Sometimes I went swimming with friends, from the age of 9. I walked there myself. I don't object to the range of activities children do these days - how lucky they are to have the opportunities! - but I do lament the way everyone is driven everywhere or shepherded everywhere these days. I feel I was much more fortunate living in a culture where we walked places by ourselves.

I am 53, when I was growing up my mum did not drive, she passed her test when I was about 16. Dad drove, we had a car, and he used the car to go to work. He was often out in the evenings too in the car as he was heavily involved in various charities and sporting committees.

My sister and I both did Brownies and Guides in the local church hall - we walked there. My sister did athletics and walked to that too. For a while we both did swimming and got the bus.

Oh and other thing! (Sorry, it's got me started now!!!) Did anyone else whose parents refused any clubs or extra-curriculars simultaneously talk about how "clever" your friends were for being able to play instruments or draw beautifully or just for seeming to know a lot about the world? My parents still don't see the connection between a wide skillset and world view and actually... doing stuff.