Would you let a 12 year old and 5 year old go to the playground together?

[NotmyrealNC]

NC in case I get called a terrible parent!

Both are very sensible, playground is 5 minutes from our house and 12 year old has a phone. I'll be WFH.

Last day of the summer holidays and wondering if this is okay? My brothers and I were certainly off all over the place at these ages in the 90s!

No

Yes ! I would with mine.

Our school would never agree to that.
And no, too young for me but that’s just me

Totally fine.

I'd be concerned about a 12-year-old who wasn't capable of keeping an eye on their five-year-old sibling for an hour at a playground.

I would allow this for my children and the local park.

Of course a 12 year old is capable of keeping an eye on a 5 year old, the point is surely that they shouldn't be expected to be responsible for a younger sibling. It's not their job.

Wow. I have this exact age gap and they go out a lot together. My 9 year old will be walking to and from school by himself from Thursday.

No way

I wouldn’t make a 12 year old take a 5 year old to the park but if they were my children and I knew what they were like out and about etc I would let them go if they both wanted to

Yeah if the 12 year old is fine with it and they get on.

Wouldnt have until recently but have been sending my 9 and nearly 7 year old to the park just behind our house with my phone so they can call me on my work phone or call their dad.
Check in with them every few mins and usually just leave the phone connected so I can hear them chatting and playing.

With my 11 and 9 year old I would give them my phone and check in less.

Am at my 9 year olds football training at their own school grounds and just asked my 11 year old if she wanted to go to the park right near us that they play at all the time with the nearly 7 year old and she didnt fancy it as she was worried. Im concerned her anxiety about being alone is from us being overly anxious and restrictive as she is our first. The boys are more confident as we were more risk taking with them.

Yes.

Ah the 11 and 9 year old have gone to the park after all! I still think 11yo is more anxious than I would like and part is becauze we would never have let her out alone at thr age I am now letting my boys go

Same. If see kids that seems fine to me.

Odd. I would have said yes definitely, if they are siblings or otherwise get on well, especially if the 12yo is sensible (I have 17, 8, 5 yos)

IME a 5yo is old enough to follow basic instructions reliably and stay in the park esp if they know the park well, and they will be happy enough to just play. A 12yo is old enough to go on their own and can handle most situations a 5yo might get into at a familiar park.

I would probably not let a 12yo take a much younger child - certainly not under 4.

I would probably not let a child under about 10 take younger children to the park. I wouldn't let my 8yo for example. I wouldn't trust him to make reasonable decisions if something unexpected came up.

I usually stay off these threads because I've been in Germany for 13 years and my sense of UK norms in matters of child independence is skewed, but I feel like I would have found this OK even with my UK hat on. I am really surprised to see so many saying no!

Not allowed where I am (walking to school alone)

Yes I would. I was babysitting for local families with multiple children when I was 13 years old, bathing them, giving them tea, putting them to bed etc.
If the 12 year old is ok with it and it's just for a short period, I'm sure it would be fine.

Yes if the 12 year old is generally responsible. I have the same age gap and mine went to the park at the bottom of our road a few times at that age.

Trying to think how old DS1 and DS2 were when I sent them out to the park together. Maybe 14 and 4? 13 and 3? I have no idea TBH.

I would too but also grew up abroad. My sister used to take me out to play (to the playground or to buy an ice cream) when she was 9 and I was 3. I get that times were different 30+y ago but I'd be fine with 12 and 5.

I think sometimes we expect too little of 12/13yos but then let them leave home at 18 and it's too rapid a transition.

For example I know of families where they don't let their younger teens cook, but I routinely cooked my own hot lunch in the school holidays while my mum was at work, from y7 onwards, and nothing bad happened.

Only you know your kids and the surroundings.

On paper, yes I would, but only on the basis that the 12 year old was on board with being the responsible one and they knew their role was to play with the 5 year old, not wander off to see their mates and leave the younger one to their own devices.

If I felt the 12 year old was likely to get distracted then I definitely wouldn't.

I did this two summers ago so DS was 5 and older DC were 12, 13 and 14. They had phones and the playground is also a 5 min walk with no roads. DS fell and cut his leg really badly so I had to run to the end of the street to carry him home. I didn’t bother again.

I probably would. Dd and her cousin are 11 and 4 and I can easily see this being ok in a year..she already lften looks after him in smaller settings.

No, a 5 year old is far too young to go alone and 12 is far too young to be responsible for the 5 year old.

Yes of course