To expect MoH to refund hen accommodation after we were refused access?

[Hennightmare]

I attended a hen party at the weekend - Friday to Sunday, staying close to a seaside resort in a private accommodation. I paid my share in advance - nearly £300.

Upon arrival, we were greeted by the owner who refused entry on the basis that hen parties (and same sex groups/stags) are not allowed and this is stated in the booking terms and conditions and elsewhere on the website. Despite reasoning, the owner was not backing down, and said there’d been an incident with a same sex group two weekends ago which required costly repairs.

MoH said she was aware of other hens who had stayed and this is how she found the place on instagram. She was told no refund would be given as there wouldn’t be time to let it again for the weekend.

We managed to find budget hotel rooms in the area but this scuppered the plans which were in place for the house - games etc.

I have looked myself and it is prominent on the website about the rules around hen parties etc. It is clear there has been inconsistent approaches in the past though.

Should the MoH cover us for her mistake? I am out of pocket after the hotel booking.

YABU - suck it up, it happened
YANBU - her mistake, she should offer to cover it

Hen parties as a rule are trashy and nightmarish and considering the owners had problems not too long ago, I think your view is extremely snobby.

Wow. That is wild that you think buying yourself lunch and a dress is the making the best of a bad situation. You are being completely duplicitous.

It’s a small amount in the context of the cost of the weekend and ‘lost’ £300 for the initial accommodation.

I think you need to prepare yourself for when MOH 'outs' you, that she paid you your share on the proviso you don't tell the others, there is going to be a lot of bad feeling going forward into this wedding, especially now she is keeping the refund for herself, that damage has already been done, and from what you have said she will not hesitate to throw you under the bus to deflect attention away from herself when the time comes, it is probably part of why she has done it.

I really don't understand why you would not speak up about the £300 refund? That should absolutely be shared back out, as well as your payment IMO, but if you want to be complicit in ripping people off, for the sake of £150 that's up to you I suppose.

Of course you won't be seeing 300 because you've had 130 you're not owed 300!

The time to sort this would have been when the new accommodation had to be paid for. MOH should have paid for all of that at the time to rectify her mistake. Now, morally, she should refund everyone £130.

I kinda felt a bit sorry for you when this thread started OP but now, nah...you're just as bad as the MoH.

I think this is the one time I'd like the Daily Mail to pick up a MN thread so you and your duplicitous behaviour get exposed to the other hens...

Enjoy spending the £130...

Well you're screwed now OP.

The bride thinks you're a dick because you threw her under the bus with MOH.
The MOH thinks you're a dick because you got all pissy about small change in the context of the overall costs.
And the rest of the group are going to be incandescent when they find out that you accepted hush money. How do you think they won't find out? Everyone is going to be gossiping at the wedding. This thread has been trending for days. It's all going to come out.

All you had to do was,.message moh back

"I never agreed to keep quiet and I think it's in appallingly bad taste that you suggested it. If you think a refund is justified to me then it needs to be given to everyone. You have the 300 back to share between two of them. I suggest you pay the other five people back as soon as you can."

The difference here is that MoH had a specific email confirming that owners’ discretion had now changed to no hens because of the recent damage to the property caused by the last occupants. That email was clearly sent because he wanted to assure himself that the booking wasn’t for a hen. At that point it wasn’t reasonable of MoH to assume she could still get under the radar. And when she didn’t respond to that email, instead of keysafe entry the owner turned up. MoH had all the warning signs that he was onto her, and she chose to ignore them.

Yeah more and more far fetched

OP you outlined the email you sent to MoH without the knowledge of the rest of the group. You made it clear you knew what she had done via the bride and said you suggested a refund. Did you make it clear that you were asking for that refund on behalf of the rest of the group ? Because the outcome was that you alone got a refund in return for your silence, and you accepted it. You indicated upthread that you weren’t comfortable with that - what changed your mind ? Because if this comes out, that email exchange will hang you out to dry as being complicit.

The overall impression is that MoH and the bride are out to protect themselves and don’t give a monkeys about the people out of pocket. By the time the wedding rolls around people will have had time to stew on their resentment and when alcohol is poured on it at the reception/evening do, l’d bet the farm that something will be said and it will all come out. There has already been one instance of a hen trying to get an explanation from the owner and you now also know that an email has been sent to MoH, but she’s only shared the bits that don’t incriminate her.

When the shit hits the fan l hope £130 was worth it, because MoH and the bride won’t hesitate to drop you in it.

Did she share out the £300 before she left the group? Or is she still off to a spa with other people's money?

I was so with you until you decided to keep the £130 bribe to keep quiet.
It's not to late to let all the hens know about it and tell the MoH to refund the £300 to the hens too!!
£430 between 8 of you is £53.75 each, nowhere near what you all lost but you're better to stick with the hens rather than the MoH and B2B.
How dare the MoH think it's ok to have a spa day with the hens money! Shocking behaviour!! She needs calling out and you can do that!
I so hope you do the right thing.

Only one objection was received so she is going ahead as planned. She said she’ll share details once booked incase anyone wants to join them.

And you're ok with that? You don't care that others have lost money?

I’ve lost money, we all have. Sometimes in life you have to draw a line under matters.

Well I’m sure you can go along with them and spend the bribe she’s given you in the spa.

Sometimes threads on here remind me how kind and thoughtful people can be, and other times they remind me how selfish and deceitful many people can be when there’s something in it for them.

I’m off to find some chats that show the nice side of people rather than you and MoH showing the nasty side. I hope you’re ashamed of yourselves. I’d love to be a fly on the wall when this all comes out.

Convenient that you, the one who knows all the details and got more money back than anyone else, gets to decide how and when to draw a line under it. MoH is a CF but you’re just as bad now.

I actually hope the other girls find out somehow that they’ve been shafted out of a refund and forced to donate to a spa weekend while OP knows the truth and gets extra dress shopping money

But you have received a large amount back, nearly half of the amount everyone originally paid. Why do you feel that is ok? You're only drawing a line under it be cause you have the money.
You've showed yourself to be quite awful I hope the others take the MoH to small claims. Then it will all come out about you being sent money.

Ewwwwwwwwwww you’re a horror.

Imagine shitting on 7 women for £130.

Hope your dress rips on the day and I hope someone finds out and makes an absolute holy show of you. Scummy behaviour.

If she left how is she going to share the spa details.

weird

What a rat! Hope your 'friends' find this thread and ID you.

Wasn't this pretty much exactly the MOH attitude that you were previously objecting to?