AIBU to be angry about comments on my granddaughters' names?

[Ellenay]

So, I have 5 grandchildren, this weekend I’m looking after all of them, my daughter and her husband are away to a wedding in France and my son and his wife have booked a little spa weekend.

I popped in to see some of my friends with them as I don’t often have the children and my friends like seeing them.

One of my friends had some other friends I’ve not met before over but we joined them. After introducing the children and then being sent to the kitchen to get a lollipop, one of these friends said oh don’t all the girls have little showgirl names, I must have looked a bit shocked as someone else then jumped in and said oh she doesn’t mean p*rnstar just very moulin rouge.

I just said I thought their names were lovely and moved on but now I’m back home I’m furious, I’m furious I didn’t give her a piece of my mind.

AIBU to think this is an absurd thing to say about children’s names?!

They are all popular names and I don't really understand the showgirl reference. I've always assumed Ruby is named after the gemstone and it has been around for generations.

Actually now that I think about it - Roxy, Ruby and Lola were all in Eastenders.

Isn't that the reaction the parents wanted when they chose the names Roxy, Lola and Ruby? Or else you would have picked names like Orla, Erin and Freya that make less of a statement.

"Showgirl names" doesn't sound like a compliment... only you know how it was said of course but why comment on kids' names at all? Comments that are slights dressed up as jokes show the heart and mind of the commenter. When people show you who they are believe them... I'd give them a wide berth, personally.

Oh go get a sense of humour!
Why is it always the people who use unusual names who get the abdabs when anyone comments. If you are sensitive( shown by your defensiveness when asked what their names are) then call them proper names. Simple!

Well she only said it because they have that type of name! Don't call kids silly names if you can't cope with the fallout!

Absolutely. Couldn't agree more.

Oh dear.

My neighbour has had dogs with all three of those names.

Well considering the Lola in the Kinks song wasn't even female,yes!

Fine names for little girls but when you are 45 and doing a presentation to the board of directors?

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 this ole line gets thrown around all the time and in this day and age its frankly boring. What would you do if you were in a board room meeting and someone stood up to present and said "my name is Ruby" what would your reaction be? Because I wouldnt bat an eyelid.

Lola, Roxy and Ruby? I feel like I’ve just stepped into Eastenders ~20 years ago 😂

It was just a stupid snobby comment. A. Bit like saying someone is common. Rude person.

You could have said ' oh really, rather like yours back in the day '

Whatever the names are, its not a kind or appropriate thing to say to the grandmother of those children.

I think (maybe I’m wrong) but how you interpret “showgirl” depends on your age. I’m early 40s and I’d get pornstar vibes from it. But maybe if you’re older (assuming you and your friends are a couple decades older being a grandma of 5) a showgirl is seen as more innocent entertainment/positive. Correct me if I’m wrong, it’s just a theory. If I am wrong then yes I agree with you, I’d be pissed off if someone said that about my daughter’s name too. I can’t understand why anyone would say anything other than an obviously positive comment to a parent or grandparent about their kid’s name. It’s so obviously going to cause offence. Maybe your friend is just not very good socially. I’m not an overly sensitive person but if anyone says anything negative about my kids it hurts and my protective mum heckles get raised. It’s normal. Someone made a ginger joke about my 4 yo son’s hair the other day that I was meant to find funny. I wanted to punch him in the face.

Why are people on MN so horrible? Genuinely curious. The OP’s come on here upset about her friend commenting on the names, she’s looking for advice and reassurance. And you make this comment that you know is going to cause another woman who has done nothing to you, to feel more upset. Just why? Is your life really so shite that the only way you can find a scrap of joy is to make someone else feel rubbish? (But of course only on an anonymous internet forum cos you wouldn’t have the guts to do it IRL)

I think they’re great names OP. I was going to call my kid Roxy if he’d been a girl. They’re also (esp Lola and Ruby) pretty common names for girls nowadays so anyone associating them with showgirls rather than a popular name for girls in the 2010s/20s is just showing their age!

Jeez 😂

I don't get why you are annoyed or shocked, they are literally showgirl names. Also pet names because I know a fair amount of dogs and cats with these names 😂
One puppy is Lola after the showgirl song!

her name was Lola, she was a showgirl

Roxanne! You dont have to put on the red light!

goodbye Ruby Tuesday

nah, not snowgirl at all

the angwr should be with your daughter/son for saddling the poor little girls with such awful names

Gosh Sunday morning has really brought some very cruel people out.
Do you feel good saying children’s names are awful? Do you often bully children’s names like that?

You know there is always the option where if you have nothing helpful to add to the thread you just don’t comment.

I think it is the opposite. 'Showgirl' used to have more negative, sexualised connotations, but in recent times, those connotations are not there in the same way.

A lot of people on this thread have said they don't think that showgirl is a negative term. It just means a glamorous dancer/singer in showy/glitzy surroundings. The sexual meaning is not there like it had been in the past.

Even Taylor Swift describes herself as a showgirl. She is as modern and contemporary as you can get!

I really like their names.

Your friends comment was ill judged but sometimes it happens.
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