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AIBU?

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To increasingly feel like men are more of a hindrance than anything else

188 replies

Windiscrazytoday · 20/08/2026 16:43

They are responsible for so many evils in the world in comparison to females
The females I know are just so much more capable and emotionally stable
I love Dh but often find myself helping him to regulate his emotions or balancing things on days out to keep the mood good for the Dc
My father, I adore, but my mother's life has not been easy with him in many aspects

Is this a peri/late 40's thing?

Feel like I'm seeing how things really are and it isn't great

OP posts:
Anendlessseriesofunfortunateevents · 20/08/2026 16:47

I came across the term "man keeping" recently (like the whole palaver of keeping a house, but keeping a man). It summed up all the effort that goes into living with one and is why I will not live with a man again.

And that's if they're a rare decent sort.

Misogyny, rape, violence, paedophiles, war, conflict, pain and health inequality, salary inequality, etc .... the list goes on and on, and men have a lot to answer for.

PrizedPickledPopcorn · 20/08/2026 16:48

I certainly won’t be doing it twice.

WildGarlicSoup · 20/08/2026 16:48

I've had far more bad experiences with women than I have with men throughout my life (54 now).

Your husband sounds very immature and volatile. Probably not a good choice to have made.

Shatteredallthetimelately · 20/08/2026 16:58

I've had far more bad experiences with women than I have with men throughout my life (54 now).

I'd have to agree here.

These so many awful, bitter women out there.

Sartre · 20/08/2026 16:58

I hope none of you have sons or grandsons.

Lexibletheflexible · 20/08/2026 17:00

I think it depends the men you choose to have around you and why you chose them. My partner is anything but a hindrance to us and the rest of his family.

PrettyLittleRose · 20/08/2026 17:01

Shatteredallthetimelately · 20/08/2026 16:58

I've had far more bad experiences with women than I have with men throughout my life (54 now).

I'd have to agree here.

These so many awful, bitter women out there.

Why don't you and @WildGarlicSoup start a thread about all the BITTER awful women out there then. Do not derail this one.

@Windiscrazytoday YANBU. Very few men are actually decent human beings. All the worst and nastiest shit in the world is because of them.

UniquePinkSwan · 20/08/2026 17:02

Is this the weekly man hating thread?

termtimeChoice · 20/08/2026 17:03

Shatteredallthetimelately · 20/08/2026 16:58

I've had far more bad experiences with women than I have with men throughout my life (54 now).

I'd have to agree here.

These so many awful, bitter women out there.

Same. I’ve had dreadful experiences.

Urgentbiscuitrequired · 20/08/2026 17:04

Shit men are a hindrance. You've just only known shit men and only you can change that.

AceInSpace · 20/08/2026 17:04

Why don’t you leave your husband, then?
I do not understand poster who whine about men and then turns out they have a male partner!

Leave him, live at least few years as single, no dating - no nothing. And then see if your views change/stay the same…

XMissPlacedX · 20/08/2026 17:04

UniquePinkSwan · 20/08/2026 17:02

Is this the weekly man hating thread?

Yep, grab some popcorn and pull up a chair

yellowbaby · 20/08/2026 17:08

termtimeChoice · 20/08/2026 17:03

Same. I’ve had dreadful experiences.

This may have been your experience and there are lots of awful people around regardless of sex but men have constructed a whole structure that puts them in pole position to exploit and take advantage of women, girls and other men. That’s going to take a bit of beating.

Daygloboo · 20/08/2026 17:14

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risingup · 20/08/2026 17:17

YANBU I will never live with a man again because it honestly feels like having an additional part time job that you don't get paid for.

Thewalrusandthecarpenter · 20/08/2026 17:22

Yes, totally agree. My father was a remote man who didn’t want a relationship with anyone, including his children; I unwittingly recreated my parents’ relationship. My ex left when I was pregnant nearly 30 years ago and I haven’t lived with a man since then. Having said that, I do have plenty of lovely male friends so they’re definitely not all bad.

MightyGoldBear · 20/08/2026 17:25

I felt this way growing up with my dad and brother. I was somehow this unpaid slave because I have a vagina.
Then I realised I was just surrounded by misogynistic men.

I met my husband and realised oh no men can be absolutely wonderful. He is a fully grown adult who takes care of himself the children the house and me! Obviously we are team but he enriches my life he makes it easier. That's how it should be.

Weeellokthen · 20/08/2026 17:29

PrettyLittleRose · 20/08/2026 17:01

Why don't you and @WildGarlicSoup start a thread about all the BITTER awful women out there then. Do not derail this one.

@Windiscrazytoday YANBU. Very few men are actually decent human beings. All the worst and nastiest shit in the world is because of them.

"Very few men are decent human beings"😮
I am so sorry YOU have experienced shitty men in your life.
I choose only good men in mine

PrettyLittleRose · 20/08/2026 17:30

Weeellokthen · 20/08/2026 17:29

"Very few men are decent human beings"😮
I am so sorry YOU have experienced shitty men in your life.
I choose only good men in mine

Bless.

MummyOre · 20/08/2026 17:30

Lexibletheflexible · 20/08/2026 17:00

I think it depends the men you choose to have around you and why you chose them. My partner is anything but a hindrance to us and the rest of his family.

This 100%

WildGarlicSoup · 20/08/2026 17:32

PrettyLittleRose · 20/08/2026 17:01

Why don't you and @WildGarlicSoup start a thread about all the BITTER awful women out there then. Do not derail this one.

@Windiscrazytoday YANBU. Very few men are actually decent human beings. All the worst and nastiest shit in the world is because of them.

Do not tell me what to do. However, in doing so you have proven my point. Bossy madam.

EmailsaysOOO · 20/08/2026 17:34

These days this is a common thing for a thread in Mumsnet. In real life , I think most women don't suffer with this feeling.

sittingonabeach · 20/08/2026 17:37

Do any of you have sons?

canuckup · 20/08/2026 17:37

Completely agree

Like having a third child

PrizedPickledPopcorn · 20/08/2026 17:42

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Why’s that then?

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