To increasingly feel like men are more of a hindrance than anything else

[Windiscrazytoday]

They are responsible for so many evils in the world in comparison to females
The females I know are just so much more capable and emotionally stable
I love Dh but often find myself helping him to regulate his emotions or balancing things on days out to keep the mood good for the Dc
My father, I adore, but my mother's life has not been easy with him in many aspects

Is this a peri/late 40's thing?

Feel like I'm seeing how things really are and it isn't great

My life is easier now im not with a hindrance. I couldn't go through that again so picked someone who would enhance my life not drag me down

no offence but are you sure you didn’t pick someone like your father ?. My husband is amazing and my life definitely would not be easier without out men in the world .

Or, feel free to not gatekeep on this one. OP literally asked if she's being unreasonable to feel this way. Some posters do feel she's being unreasonable, and it's not your place to tell them to get lost.

This. ^

Well said @ownedbymydogs

I have to agree with this as well.

I'm a woman and am definitely the needier of the two in my relationship. DH has more patience in almost every area of life and puts up with a lot from me, if I'm honest. That said, there are things I can do better than he can, and he's stuck around for 25 years, so we're doing alright. We balance over another out.

Certainly, some men are more trouble than they're worth, but the same can be said of some women, as well. I acknowledge that men are responsible for most violent crimes, but it's still unfair and unhelpful to tar all men with the same brush. There's a vast spectrum of evil apart from the type of violent crime that men are more likely to commit, and women are guilty of a lot of it, but that doesn't mean we should blame all women or say that women are more trouble than we're worth.

I just get sick of whataboutery. Disagree that 'not all men are like that' by all means, like the Not My Nigels always do...., But the 'I know far more WOMEN who are horrible/vile/bitter etc,' type comments is whataboutery that has no place on this thread IMO.

So what if you do know more horrible women (than horrible men?) The thread is not about them is it?!

.

This thread is a shining example of the superiority of women 🙄

Threads tend to evolve on chat forums.

It's a rare thread that doesn't have opinions and posts that don't stick absolutely rigidly to the topic.

The trouble is, @getthroughonemoreday , you are wrong. The ‘vast spectrum of evil’ you talk about is also mostly carried out by men, or women would be making up more than 4% of the prison population. And that’s just one metric.

But not my Nigel, obviously.

It’s only whataboutery if someone is using women’s behaviour to excuse or minimise men’s behaviour. Saying “I don’t agree that men are uniquely or disproportionately a hindrance, because that isn’t my experience” is simply answering the AIBU question.

You don’t get to ask whether a generalisation about men is unreasonable and then declare contrary experiences irrelevant because they involve women. If only agreement with the premise is allowed, there wasn’t much point putting it in AIBU.

And they congregate on mumsnet.

This!!

Perhaps some parents of boys have some explaining to do regarding their son's attitude and behaviour also..

My DH is generally great although as we get older I sometimes see the beginnings of a grumpy old man starting to evolve.

I'm late 40's and if something happened to DH I wouldn't want to go through it all again with someone else.

And on this site.

me too.

Maggie Thatcher destroyed the community I lived in and let a Government which caused damage which lasts until this day. Prominent female leaders in Pakistan, Bangladesh and India did absolutely no better than the men and their Governments were marked by significant corruption. I would love to be able to argue that women in government were more moral and achieved better outcomes than men, but with the possible exception of Jacinda Adern and Jenny Shipley in NZ I really do not think the argument holds.

The OP's title is about men being a hindrance and started talking about her DH.

If most threads on MN are to believed all MILs (females) are evil and a hindrance

How on earth is that a derail? The actual OP is all about comparing men to women, by pretty much saying that the former are shit whilst the latter are amazing, based on nothing more than their sex.

Even if OP hadn't made it clear, it's a very obvious paradigm that, when there are only two distinct varieties of something in the world, specifically pinpointing one of those varieties to opine how useless it is is clearly implying that the other is much better by default.

And on bikes

Oh don't get me wrong. My dc dad was a horrible alcoholic. But I was young and stupid.
I learned my lesson

I don’t disagree with you. But you have rather ignored what I said.

Yes these threads are so cringe worthy. I really hope no men I know ever see the misandry of this site.