To feel inadequate seeing naked women in movies?

[Frankie47]

Whenever I see naked women in movies they always have amazing bodies and I massively spiral afterwards comparing my old, very flat chested body to theirs. Today I watched some of American Pie and when it got to the bit where ‘Nadia’ strips off and they’re watching her masturbate, I really felt awful about myself. Was very painful to feel so inadequate and know that i don’t have the body that she has so I will never have men desire me like that. I know it’s a fictional character obviously but the actress and her body do represent the ideal that I can’t match up to. How do others stop themselves feeling this?

No my best friend of over 50 year’s daughter who is like my second daughter. We are closer than family. He has confided in me as she talks to me about stuff she doesn’t want to talk to her mother about! He knows that so I knew he was going to propose before his future mil did (she’d have self combusted with excitement & let the cat out the bag). I was tasked with finding out her ring size / close enough for you? Maybe I do know!

Er, no.

Your perceived attractiveness has nothing to do with your value as a woman.

Mis typed - I’m dyslexic. It’s my friends daughter although she is my daughters oldest friend as they’ve known each other since birth

A BMI of more than 60

It says it all.

Why do you keep repeatedly posting about how close you are.

the bottom line is a bmi of 60 should have you deeply concerned if you cared bout her and deeply concerned about rhe relationship she’s in.

instead you’re on here glorifying and unwell woman like it’s some love story of the century,

Exactly

My friend was the same, her child is now a grown up with a bmi of well over 65 as she gorges on sweets and junk food now she’s an adult. She’s too big to work, can hardly move without sweating, is teetering on the edge of needing oxygen as she is breathless even at rest

and you say she is proud of her curves and very happy? With a partner who adores her and doesn’t care about her being so dangerously overweight? @Biggles27

I agree but it is what it is. When I tried speaking to her she sees no issue 🤷. Can’t force her to loose weight. She told me she loves her curves 🤷

The point however is she is happy - can’t work it out myself but not my circus! The relevance to this post is even at a massive size you can be in a relationship - not a critique of whether she should lose weight - I think that’s pretty obvious to everyone but her

Because I was accused of not knowing she was happy

No one said yoy can’t be in a relationship if you’re larger, in fact most said the opposite. The issue you face here is you glorified a woman who is killing hee self with food.

You are seriously saying that someone who can’t work; can barely leave the house in fact can “hardly move” and spends her life “gorging” on junk…. Is very happy and loves her curves? And her DH is not slightest bit bothered?

You don’t know she’s happy
not an accusation
a fact

There are men who have sexual fetishes for larger women.

"Chubby chasers" and "feeders".

Yes indeed.

So he wouldn’t be adoring the person
He would be adoring the fat, spectating them “gorging” themselves and revelling in fact that the are basically imprisoned on the sofa

Pahahaha yeah I wouldn’t be thrilled either tbf.

Yup. That’s why I said she should be concerned, not glorifying it, if the man doesn’t have a fat fetish then there is something very wrong with him if he’s not deeply worried about her weight.

We have been agreeing the entire time on this poster

Not the point of the thread, but it gives me the rage when the word curves is used to describe fat. They are two completely different things. I'm both overweight and curvy, big boobs and big bum, relatively small waist, a curve from the shoulders if looking at me from behind. My weight has fluctuated massively over the years, I've been obese and a healthy weight but I've still had a very curvy shape regardless. I can never describe myself as curvy anymore because it's completely misused. It also used to be a compliment if someone said I had nice curves but now it seems to describe rolls of tummy fat, double chins and wobbly thighs.

It's an awful, misogynistic film. It's really not worth losing sleep over it. The problem is the film, not you. The problem is, actually, Hollywood. If you ever watch European cinema, you'll see a much greater variety of what the female actors look like, much less obsession with beauty and films aren't all just aimed at the 'male gaze'. American culture is, IMO, the most objectifying culture (women-wise) on the planet. Yes, it absolutely isn't pleasant being a woman watching that kind of film, whether you look like 'Nadia' or not (as an Easter European, I also want to puke at all the EE women stereotypes) because either way you're faced with being judged like a cow at a farmer's market, and not a fully fledged human being.