India – loved it, but I came back feeling so violated.

[LondonLass40]

Just back from the Golden Triangle with my husband (43) and 12yr daughter. Stunning forts, incredible food ( lucky no Delhi belly 😀) amazing history is genuinely breathtaking.

But I’m struggling to process the darker side.

One afternoon in Delhi, my husband stayed at the hotel. I took my daughter to a busy market near cannaught place in broad daylight, crowded. A man walked past and grabbed my breast. Right in front of my daughter. He just kept walking. I froze. My poor girl kept asking why he touched Mummy.

Then there was the constant selfie nonsense when my husband was there and men lining up, putting their arms around me, getting too close while my husband stood there awkwardly not knowing what to do.

And the worst part was at the Red Fort queue. This guy kept pushing into me from behind – clearly not an accident. I turned around and shouted at him. He didn't run, didn't even look embarrassed , he just walked away ignoring me like I was invisible. I spoke to a security guard who just pretend to do something and did absolutely nothing.

I know these issues aren't isolated to India and this could happen in London too. But this was so blatant, so frequent, so relentless that I simply cannot ignore it. I've been to so many tourist destinations around the world and have never experienced harassment on this scale. It felt inescapable.

I don't know – does this only happen to Western women? I'm sure men like this do the same to Indian women too. How on earth do they deal with this every single day? I honestly don't think I'd go back.

Not at all. The nation named in the thread title is not a signatory to the refugee convention. Not everyone is. Lots of countries aren't.

India, detains, deports and protects their citizens.

Clearly they don't protect their female citizens very well though? Hence the thread.

They have enough of their own men causing issues. No need to bring more in.

This a bit sensationalist but definitely Japan's sexual nightlife culture has a very nasty side. Agree re the train groping bars which can be seen in the BBC chikan documentary
Otoh the breast milk bars are not a common thing. There is only one (thank goodness!). Sounds awful though- I very much doubt any of these women want to breastfeed random men. Horrible.

https://www.vice.com/en/article/everything-you-always-wanted-to-know-about-drinking-breastmilk-2/

https://www.tokyoreporter.com/japan-news/tabloid/lactating-ladies-nurse-customers-at-kabukicho-milk-bar/

Otoh the geisha comment is unfair. Geishas started out in 18th century as highly trained entertainers who danced, played instruments etc but did not sell sex, in contrast to oiran (courtesans) who did this but also sold sex. Geisha was one of the few ways a woman could become independent and they were respected for their artistic skills.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oiran

Over the years it did become blurred ad geisha typically had danna (patrons) who they slept with, and it was often very sexually exploitative in 19th & 20th centuries. But modern day geishas don't sell sex, just do the traditional art stuf It's worth noting it's not only countries like Japan which have had exploitative traditions like this. The kind of courtesan culture in 19th-20th century France had a lot in common with it, as did earlier systems in Italy, Spain etc.