Stag do plans and suspect abbreviations

[WestlieJ]

DP is joint best man for a close friends Wedding in early summer and the stag is abroad next month. DP sorted the logistics of booking, chasing everyone for payment etc (there is 16 people going). The other best man has put together a ‘plan’ for the long weekend and sent to DP for his approval.

I’ve seen this because it’s saved to iCloud and we can jointly access that through the iPad we share to watch Netflix etc.

It’s all fairly standard stuff, but the final section is titled ‘expected costs’ and lists things such as a beer, meal in restaurant, etc, to help people budget. Within this section there are abbreviations, which I’ve taken to be ‘dodgy’ given they are not written in full and one is fairly obviously a strip club, although no idea on ‘MP’.

Ive got it in front of me as took a photo so have written out exactly:

SC - Ent: €10-20 / PD: €50-70
MP - €50 / HR +€30 / OWO + €40 / PM,SO +€50 / FS €100

I have already asked DP who said he scanned over the main itinerary and didn’t even realise that last section was on there and has no idea what it means. He also said he never has and never will step foot in a strip club.

Am I being naive to think DP was unaware? And does anyone know what the last part means?

Op completely burying her head in the sand it seems…

Or - given the OP, they’d refuse to believe it and say my one is one of the good ones! I can trust him! You mean women don’t understand. Or they’d just turn a blind eye. Is this powerlessness or refusing to use our power?

The price list suggests it is seriously planned as part of the event. I would say I wasn't going.

Yes, Word Soup is a good phrase.

Is he really implying that they are going to work out the costs like:

Day 1: 1x pizza €12 and 12 beers €36
Day 2: 1x Fry up €10 and 10 beers €30

Just so Dave doesn't have a spare €34 at the end of his holiday and have to pay a few pence on an exchange fee? Possibly after spaffing €€€ on Blow Jobs?

Insane.

Even more insane when most people spend on zero fee cards rather than cash. Although there are obvious benefits to cash if you're married and buying prostitutes.

Definitely tell the bride and all the hens.

I also find it disgusting that the organiser is mindful of the cost of living crisis so wants to make sure all the men get the most from their money, but isn't concerned about the welfare of the women he's lining up for them to shag.

The Groom isn't going to use the sex services according to the OP

Stop making excuses for this OP. If your husband had balls he'd be opting out of this. We are talking about women being exploited here.

If he goes - he's complicit. If you were comfortable with this you would not have posted on here

Apparently. But even so, I think she should know. All the stag parties significant others should be aware.

Well quite. Nothing quite as attractive as a thrifty punter.

But the cost of living is obviously nonsense he blurted out on the spot because men struggling with a cost of living crisis don't spend money flying to another country to buy beer and hookers.

They arent exactly planning a cultured experience that they can only get in Benid...oh wait, i'm wrong. They can only get that level of privacy by flying out of the country so their wives never find out what they are doing.

Thrifty and sly. What a winning combo.

OP

If you were the maid of honour of a hen party where you found out some of the other hens were going to pay to sexually exploit poor people, would you still go?

There is a difference between going away with some chums, knowing that one or two might misbehave, and arranging an event holiday that includes the price list for the events,

It apparently wasn't the Groom who organised the sex stuff. I'm just not sure why his wife to be needs to be told if he's not going to be cheating on her.

Of course the Groom and @WestlieJ's husband are poor, innocent victims in this disgusting planned exploitation of women. Arranged by one of the Groom's closest friends. They must be completely shocked that their friends are so disgusting.

Anyone who knowingly stays with a man using sex workers, is just as complicit as the perverted men.

Oh for goodness sake. Where did I say that they were innocent victims. Have you actually read any of my other posts. The wife to be probably knows nothing about any of this. Hth

Why are you so seemingly complicit in this vileness? Your husband and his friends are pigs who use vulnerable women as sport during a 'lads weekend'. Enjoy being in a relationship with a person who turns a blind eye to someone with a wife enjoying OWO.

JESUS CHRIST.

Grim. Imagine being “aware” of what’s going on on your stage do but thinking you’re so high and fucking mighty cause they sourced it ethically.

Yeah, impossible to imagine cause it’s bullshit. You know they’ve cooked up a response to show you OP. They are all for it and will go and do it regardless

Divorce your DH and send the pricelist to all the other partners, including the bride.

This is utterly disgusting. I am so glad I'm single!

ATM = ass to mouth (where someone receives anal and then the penis goes in their mouth after, mostly without protection)

• isn't that what Neil Gaiman was into? 🤮

Any man who wants that is definitely sadistic imo.

Exactly. I'm glad I only date women. Plenty of worries- but stag nights & sex buying are unlikely to be one of them, at least.

The more you post, the more I find you quite reprehensible for your uncaring and permissive attitude regarding the fact that you know these men will frequent a parlour where women are being made to do sex work!! The prices are so low, as others - including previous sex workers said: those women are not doing this out of their own free will. I’ll say it again and I don’t mind my post being flagged: you are part of the problem for your dismissive attitude to the way women are being abused by the very men you know and you know your hubby to hang around with. You should be ashamed of yourself for not speaking out. As for your husband being friends with them: WHAT A FUCKING PRINCE!!

She’s checked out. She doesn’t want to deal with this. Let her ride off into her own happy sunset being married to a man who will happily stand by watching his friends abuse vulnerable women. Slow claps all around 👏👏

This has turned into a bit of a pile on on poor OP. She's had a lot to take in in one day. Of course she's not going to go straight from finding this list to threatening divorce if he still goes on the stag.

Best wishes OP.

I'd suggest your next move might be following up on the thought that these prices are so low that the women are probably trafficked, by trying to find a good documentary about this issue and watching it together with DH. Now this has come up, you could both do with being better informed about the whole issue. And see where you want to take things from what you learn, and what you think of his reaction.

(I don't have one to suggest, I'm woefully poorly informed about the issue myself. Maybe someone else has.)

I wonder how many men cheat on stag dos? I don't know how reliable these surveys are,,but they suggest quite high numbers.

https://travmedia.com/showPRPreview/100020678

https://www.standard.co.uk/news/uk/a-third-of-men-cheat-while-on-a-stag-do-says-survey-7965921.html#:~:text=A%20third%20of%20men%20cheat%20while%20on,did%20the%20same%20while%20on%20a%20hen%2Ddo.

https://www.google.com/amp/s/metro.co.uk/2012/07/04/lads-on-tour-mentality-means-men-are-most-likely-to-cheat-on-stag-do-490429/amp/

https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&opi=89978449&url=www.dailystar.co.uk/travel/travel-news/millions-brits-micro-cheat-stag-33122037&ved=2ahUKEwjK98zA3rmTAxU8XUEAHT7zBq04ChAWegQIMBAB&usg=AOvVaw2FTQqKKZLC8ZXiH0IxRCIP

https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&opi=89978449&url=www.indy100.com/lifestyle/people-cheat-hen-stag-do&ved=2ahUKEwjrqe_d3rmTAxVncvEDHThXEig4ChAWegQILRAB&usg=AOvVaw2meTc66G1zIXCc6w_brgRS

https://www.yoursexualhealth.co.uk/the-shocking-truth-behind-british-hen-and-stag-do-culture/#:~:text=Over%2010%20million%20(10.5%20million,have%20or%20would%20do%20this.

He knew. I bought this innocent crap for years.