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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Modern life doesn’t work

358 replies

DeluluTaylor · 21/01/2026 07:16

I say this reading thread after thread of people trying to work around nigh impossible situations.
I am sitting here with chronic IBS from stress, trying to get the kids out of the door, to a school which can’t meet their need, to go to a job where I’m firefighting as nothing is fit for purpose anymore. Finding care homes for younger and younger people. People who want to work but can’t as they have learning disabilities. Yet in the 20th century an estimated 40-70% of people with LD were employed.
I have 38p in my bank account and all my money goes on paying for a big house that we’re in from 6.30pm 7 the next morning, with a huge garden which none of us have time to do anything in. That I sit in on my own when the kids go to see their father in a bedsit at weekends. Yet there are families down the road with three kids and two parents in one room.

The whole thing is crazy. If you were going to arrive here from another planet and looked at late stage capitalism you would say why do you live like this? Getting in debt to spend two weeks abroad rather than making changes to make the other 50 weeks off the year more bearable.

OP posts:
Sunsetcelebration · 22/01/2026 12:50

MindYourUsage · 22/01/2026 12:44

YANBU. I wonder where it will end. You havent even touched upon the shitshow that AI will rain down upon us. It's going to get worse. Every generation says this of course, but I think this is different.

Maybe I'm wrong, but I dont regret not bringing children into this Shit Show. It's a relief every day that I don't have them.

Agree with this. The situation will hit everyone hard but none more so than those who put in minimal effort yet act entitled to a good lifestyle.

Earthly · 22/01/2026 13:14

LeticiaMorales · 21/01/2026 09:13

Reliant on the husband for money. No fiscal independence. Few rights, lower pension.
Wouldn't be for me.

No and it's 100% positive that women have a choice but now it's become a societal norm for both parents to be back in full time work before a child is a year old, often 6 months old.

This should be a choice not a given. This is where it's messed up.

1457bloom · 22/01/2026 18:52

Now both husband and wife are expected to sign up for a bigger mortgage, pushing up prices and meaning they both have to work.

OonaStubbs · 22/01/2026 20:50

Women really don't have any more choice than they ever did. Nowadays most women have to work. In the past some women were forced to stay at home to be housewives and raise children.

Kimura · 24/01/2026 05:10

soupyspoon · 22/01/2026 07:57

Talking to people is a job, Im talking about the death of someone at the end of the phone or email at businesses that you need to communicate with

Recently Ive used companies and not realised they dont have any method whatsoever of contacting them other than a chatbot which simply repeats what is already on the website. No way of getting through by email, phone, or to a live agent. Simply no way

'talking to people' is a job.

What you're referring to is customer support, an industry where all the agents you speak to are using a computer. So getting rid of computers wouldn't really help you there.

PrincessFairyWren · 24/01/2026 05:17

CoastalGrey · 21/01/2026 07:35

Couldn’t agree more. We pay other people to look after our kids so we can go out to work then buy stuff we don’t need with our wages because you’ve got to feel like there’s a point to working and in the moment nice things tick that box but long term none of it makes us happy.

I don't think most of us are buying things that we don't need. With the cost of living, most peoples money is going on essentials like housing costs and food.
The thing that i pay money for that I don't "need" is insurance which I don't want to test that theory.

1457bloom · 24/01/2026 08:13

If you think this is bad try late stage communism.

NoKidsSendDogs · 24/01/2026 18:47

OonaStubbs · 21/01/2026 08:16

Honestly I think the answer is to abolish computers. Worldwide. And go back to basics. It would make things so more simpler and more people would be employed doing tangible work.

What nonsense.

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