Do you wipe your bottom standing up or sitting down?

[justtheonequestion1]

Well, I thought this was an entirely uncontroversial topic, but my DH has discovered (through a conversation) that I stand up to wipe my bottom after going to to the loo.

Do you, for whatever reason, do the same? Or are you a sitter and you lean either forwards or to the side?

I feel as though there are multiple reasons to stand, perhaps you have mobility issues, a larger body, or it is simply your preference (like me).

Please tell me that at least some of you do this and I am not entirely abnormal!!

I always usually avoid contributing to these threads because of, you know, poo troll. But everyone who sits seems to be going in from behind. I reach in from the front. I do use a little stepstool though, have since dd1 started using the loo about 9 years ago and we gotnone for her. Perhaps having slighter higher up legs makes this easier?

Step stool for you feet, people! Much more comfortable toileting!

If you are standing to poo, how do you read Mumsnet or play Candy Crush whilst evacuating your bowels?

We don't stand to poo. We poo sitting down.

Then we stand to wipe

If you’re reaching from the front how do you manage to wipe from front to back?

You sitting lot are so wierd. Your hand will practically be in the bog. Of course you stand

Yes stand up because that’s What me mum taught me to do..

When you're putting your hand in your sullied arse crack, being in the vicinity of what's just come out of it doesn't seem that big a deal.

What's happening to all the shitty wet wipes? Please say you to dont flush them. You do though, don't you? There's usually a washbasin to hand. Just wash.

I use a bidet bottle with warm water whilst on the loo then stand to dry/do a final wipe with a little loo roll. I used to sit and wipe but too fat to manage it now.

How do people clean their toilets without putting their hands in the bowl?

Also, do you not wash your hands after you take a dump?

What!? 🤣

Just found a survey on Reddit about this, completed by 951 people. Interesting results male vs female:

male > https://imgur.com/gallery/men-sitting-standing-AbOVz

vs

female > https://imgur.com/gallery/women-sitting-standing-LnzNs

I sit and DH stands. I wondered what the hell he was doing when I accidentally walked in on him once. He stands facing the loo with a foot up on the loo seat. We have one toilet roll on the holder and one sitting on the back of the loo as I was sick of him keep taking it off the holder.

Does no one here have a bidet? They’re not just for washing your feet. 🤣🤣

I've got a wash dry toilet. It's fab.

You'll be horrified to learn that in some countries (Greece for example) you are not supposed to flush anything down the loo (apart from wee and poo of course), not even toilet paper. When we visit Greece we take scented nappy bags with us and fill one or two up with used toilet paper over a day then take them out with us when we go out to put in the communal rubbish collection areas. And this is not even rural areas, this is Athens.

As per the topic, I sit, never even crossed my mind to stand, does the wee not run down your legs or do you wipe your front first? What about during menstruation, do you stand for that too? Wouldn't that also just run down your legs? I was always told you should wipe front to back from behind so as not to cause UTIs or other infections, I find that a bit hard/awkward so I wipe bum from behind than wipe my front from in front after.

I balance on one bum cheek.

The idea of bum cheeks slapping together pre wipe wouldn't be for me.

I’m a stander, well it’s more of a skiing position as someone else said, I don’t know how I would properly wipe without my hand hitting the toilet bowl if I was sitting.

Ehhh… don’t you risk poo falling on the floor?? And if you’re turning around before wiping isn’t the poo smudging all over the place?

@justtheonequestion1 i love this thread

as a stander I’m not flexible to twist behind when sitting down. Do you not damage the toilet seat bending over to one side every time?

these wet wipes and nappy bags users need to stop. how many will you use in a lifetime having a poo

really concerned about the poster asking does poo not fall out when you stand up. You need to stop pooing before you go in with the tissue either way

Stand. Partner does same,but faces the toilet. Wet wipe user here too (but don't flush them).

How on earth have you got to be an adult without working out how to wipe your arse without smushing poo in between your cheeks?! Vile.

If it’s uncomfortable to wipe sitting down, I suggest you do Pilates or yoga to improve your flexibility.

Always stood

I totally agree and also do the skiing position 🤣. Wiping when sat down just seems like it wouldn't be as effective at getting completely clean?

I did mention this thread to DH and asked him the question and turns out he is also a stander and was just as bemused that some people wipe when still sat down.

Usually I have to just drag my arse along the carpet as no one other than me seems to be capable of putting new loo rolls in the toilets.

I did complain about it once but was presented by blank faces as if to say that toilet rolls just magically appear in toilets.