To miss my more youthful vulva

[OptimismvsRealism]

I did not expect this bit of ageing at all (esp as I don't have kids so nothing controversial has ever really happened down there)

But I miss it feeling moister and bouncier and just generally more resilient and upbeat

And I miss not needing to pee every half hour

And then when you do pee it feels like there's more to come

Feel quite bummed out (was going to do a front bum pun but decided too shudder) to contemplate the next four decades with a buzzkill down there

I can honestly say that I've never given mine a thought.

No one ever tells you but it's awful and so unexpected. I'm 52. Zero sex drive, which is a blessing really. Vaginal atrophy isn't fun. Thinning skin and severe itching is the work of the devil. Vagifem keeps the worst of it at bay.

Great getting older isn’t it! I’m sure blokes look at their dicks struggling to inflate too and wish for those younger days! Wish I had made more of it then!

I even hate the names of the medication. Almost all of it starts with VAG. It’s like we are incapable of understanding what we need to buy if it doesn’t contain the word VAG!

you don’t see that on the man’s side -Cockagra.

Well I kind of agree and you made me laugh but it's also a bit different. Not every woman will break a bone, whereas every woman will go through the menopause and I guess it helps younger women to know that not everyone suffers.

To be honest I assume the IT'S TOTALLY FINE HAHA posts are from trolly men

Not because I think it's awful for everyone but I don't think it's nothing for most people and even if it were for you you'd know enough women who found it hard to not be a dick about it

Sorry you can't dictate what people post, and I don't want younger women to think that all this is inevitable or normal past 50. I am not a man. Bit much to assume that everyone who disagrees with you is one.

I posted asking if you had checked for pre-diabetes. And I still think weeing every half hour isn't normal. That's not gloating. It's common sense.

It’s normal if you have untreated atrophy. It mimics a urine infection very well. Take it from me. I was weeing every 15 minutes. Estriol cream has saved my life.

It stresses me out how unempathetic so many people are. "Well I don't have this so it's WEIRD"

OK. If you only want everyone else to tell you that they suffer in exactly the same way, and getting older stinks, AIBU might be the wrong forum.

Disagreeing with you is not showing a lack of empathy.

I totally get it!
I've been using hrt and ovestin for years, it make a massive difference
With the cream, my lovely GP said not to bother with the applicator, just a pea sized amount on a finger works well and so much easier... use every night for 2 weeks then 3 x a week ongoing

It would really be worth getting checked out re poss diabetes, just in case.

I think pharmacists can do a quick test as a starting point
Good luck!

I don’t think it’s really disagreeing, is it? Presumably the women going ‘mine’s fine’ haven’t seen any changes in that area, so the question about ‘wanting my youthful vulva back’ wouldn’t apply to them because they still pretty much had theirs. Some people have answered sympathetically, saying they’ve had no issues but others have been quite dismissive and implied the OP is strange or fussing somehow, or suffering something through some fault of their own.

As an example, I’ve not had a single hot flush - not even a hint of one. If someone started an AIBU detailing how awful theirs were and were they being unreasonable to want the temperature control of a 25 yr old, then me shrugging my shoulders and saying “I’m fine” isn’t very helpful. Clearly the questioner would be aiming their question at women who were suffering with hot flushes too.

Yes, AIBU is a bear pit and I haven't read the whole thread, only the OP's posts and some others saying they are not looking forward to getting older. I tend to push back a bit against that narrative because it's so all pervasive on MN and indeed on all social media.

As a 39 year old, MN can be a really depressing read when it comes to ageing. Sometimes I have to stop reading it as it makes me panic.
With myself I have noticed I only have to look at a cake and I put on weight. Periods are much lighter and shorter and odd grey hair popping up. I am dreading menopause and peri which most people seem to start around my age.

To counterbalance the vaginal atrophy I’ve had no hot flushes, night sweats, aching joints, thinning hair, dry skin and other symptoms of menopause so apart from the bladder probs I’ve been ok. We are all different aren’t we.

@CobaltQueen You should remember that those of us who feel reasonably ok in meno or peri rarely post as it's often dismissed as "smug". There is a confirmation bias. People who have issues post on MN. Others stay quiet.

Same here, and the cream seems to be sorting the atrophy and bladder.

It sure does. It’s like a miracle. So glad I found it x

Mine has just arrived. Trying to decide whether to start immediately or wait til bedtime.

Haha God the decisions of adulthood eh.

@OptimismvsRealism Estriol cream? Start at bedtime x

I've been thrown into surgical menopause, only allowed a tiny mount of HRT but Ovestin has been a saviour (for those bits obviously). I wonder if I could bathe my entire body in Ovestin, it might work wonders.

I thought of doing that too 😁😆😅 I've seen it suggested as an anti aging face cream.....

I hate that word. Just call it a fanny!

I can’t stand the word fanny. 🤢

Well anything would be better than the v word. Vagina is marginally better