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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To blame DH for ringworm and jock itch?

142 replies

Lello452 · 11/03/2024 19:23

For some time now DH has had the most god awful smelly and sweaty feet, he won't see a professional about it but in the absence of a diagnosis it's highly likely to be athlete's foot as he has all of the symptoms.

He washes them daily which does jot all and he hasn't committed to a proper treatment regime. He has used some powder he bought online inconsistently, a few times here and there. The problem persists. He has to keep his sock laundry seperate to everybody else's clothes.. it's that bad. I have insisted he wears crocs around the house as the smell of his socks when he's not wearing shoes is just too much.

He's very embarrassed about it he says, but only where professionals are concerned. He's happy for me and DC to deal with the smell which he's almost nose blind to now so he thinks we're exaggerating. I will say, this aside, he's a clean person who showers daily.

A couple of weeks ago I developed what I'm now fairly certain was sodding jock itch on the skin around my groin, inner thigh crease. I'll spare you further details.

Now, today, I received a call from my child's teacher who thinks he's developing ringworm.

Unfamiliar with ringworm, I had to look it up, low and behold it's the same thing that causes athlete's foot and jock itch.

AIBU to think his feet are the source. He doesn't think so, of course.

OP posts:
Cnidarian · 11/03/2024 21:07

Oh Lord you would be so much happier without having to deal with this utter drain of a man. And yes, he should cut his bloody feet off if he can't be bothered to put some cream on them.

Faranth · 11/03/2024 21:08

This is the anti fungal laundry detergent op https://www.sainsburys.co.uk/gol-ui/product/halo-sports-laundry-liquid-1l-25-washes-

Jtdoyoveme · 11/03/2024 21:09

Lello452 · 11/03/2024 19:23

For some time now DH has had the most god awful smelly and sweaty feet, he won't see a professional about it but in the absence of a diagnosis it's highly likely to be athlete's foot as he has all of the symptoms.

He washes them daily which does jot all and he hasn't committed to a proper treatment regime. He has used some powder he bought online inconsistently, a few times here and there. The problem persists. He has to keep his sock laundry seperate to everybody else's clothes.. it's that bad. I have insisted he wears crocs around the house as the smell of his socks when he's not wearing shoes is just too much.

He's very embarrassed about it he says, but only where professionals are concerned. He's happy for me and DC to deal with the smell which he's almost nose blind to now so he thinks we're exaggerating. I will say, this aside, he's a clean person who showers daily.

A couple of weeks ago I developed what I'm now fairly certain was sodding jock itch on the skin around my groin, inner thigh crease. I'll spare you further details.

Now, today, I received a call from my child's teacher who thinks he's developing ringworm.

Unfamiliar with ringworm, I had to look it up, low and behold it's the same thing that causes athlete's foot and jock itch.

AIBU to think his feet are the source. He doesn't think so, of course.

I’m not saying it’s not connected HOWEVER I developed ringworm at 34 and was single for 5 years so wasn’t in contact with anyone other than my child (who has no issues) I wouldn’t blame him for things that can happen regardless

Olivebrancholivia · 11/03/2024 21:10

This reply has been deleted

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Are you actually okay? This is bizarre.

OP. Give him an ultimatum.treat it or get out. You can't live like this

rwalker · 11/03/2024 21:14

Doesn’t sound like athletes foot to have it that bad for that long the skin would be red raw and incredibly painful
applying barrier cream can make it worse sealing it in and not allowing feet to breathe

some people can’t wear synthetic socks

ether make it a hill to die on or work with him
as you say he’s nose blind to it so literally will not see it as problem

I’ve had athletes foot and jock itch not caught it from anyone it was a combination of me not showering straight after sport and not drying my feet properly

over time both me and the kids have had it at different times never be too hot in towels and wearing slippers we’ve never caught it off each other

BakedBeanAddict · 11/03/2024 21:16

Whilst all the experts are here, what are we using for jock itch? Preferably from Amazon

KestrelMoon · 11/03/2024 21:17

He has had it for so long, that I doubt the usual OTC stuff will work. He needs to see his GP and get prescription strength anti-fungals. Perhaps even oral tablets.

You will also need him to commit to throwing away any shoes he has worn barefoot. Throwing away all socks and replacing them. He will need to spray all his shoes with antifungal spray until two weeks after all symptoms disappear.

He sounds susceptible to it, so he will need a preventative like a medicated foot powder to ensure he is not reinfected.

He should spray down the shower/bath with bleach and rinse after each use as well, or it will transfer to you and kids. He needs to be religious about washing his hands immediately after touching his feet, socks, shoes.

SD1978 · 11/03/2024 21:18

Completely reasonable. He's known about this for ages, and now it's affecting you and your son. I'd be bloody furious.

Fibble · 11/03/2024 21:18

BakedBeanAddict · 11/03/2024 21:16

Whilst all the experts are here, what are we using for jock itch? Preferably from Amazon

any of the athlete's foot creams like Canesten, Daktarin, Lamisil

BobbyBiscuits · 11/03/2024 21:23

Ringworm, yeah. Same thing. Daktarin cream works for that. I hope he accepts he needs it sorting. It's very catching.

Lello452 · 11/03/2024 21:25

Ihatethenewlook · 11/03/2024 21:06

Yes. I typed quickly and put bacterial when it’s fungal. It’s still classed as an std as it passed from skin to skin contact, whether it’s during sexual contact or not. And the grotty twat has actually managed to infect his wifes genitals. Weird that. I’m sure it was much more innocent contact how one or both of them have spread it to their child. Doesn’t change the fact he basically caught a potential sex fungus from his dad. Lovely

You're talking out of your arse. I haven't had sex with him in a very long time. It's strange that the first thing you think of is sex when there are numerous other ways of spreading it such as towels, laundry, linens. Or are you implying that somebody has done something to DS? Get your mind out of the gutter you complete weirdo.

OP posts:
KestrelMoon · 11/03/2024 21:25

It’s not a “sex fungus” they only say “like many STDs” as in it has similar vector of transmission when it infects the groin that it can be passed on by sex.

The fungus is yeast. You can get a yeast infection anywhere on your body, no sex is required, and gasp no skin on skin contact is needed either.

Remagirl · 11/03/2024 21:27

I couldn't live with this. It would be a case of sort it or move out.

Lello452 · 11/03/2024 21:34

I've added the detergent to my basket, thank you.

I have serious doubts about whether he will make an effort to commit to what's needed to be done to eliminate the problem. He'll likely use the cream if it lands on the doorstep and he thinks it'll shut me up but I can't see him throwing all of his shoes away.

He got a new pair a few weeks ago which would have been a good time to try to break the cycle but it didn't even occur to him. It's just disgusting isn't it 😔

OP posts:
BoobyDazzler · 11/03/2024 21:37

Ihatethenewlook · 11/03/2024 21:06

Yes. I typed quickly and put bacterial when it’s fungal. It’s still classed as an std as it passed from skin to skin contact, whether it’s during sexual contact or not. And the grotty twat has actually managed to infect his wifes genitals. Weird that. I’m sure it was much more innocent contact how one or both of them have spread it to their child. Doesn’t change the fact he basically caught a potential sex fungus from his dad. Lovely

It is NOT classed as an STD, although if anything that could be transmitted from one person to another by touch was classed as an STD perhaps there wouldn’t be such a ridiculous stigma attached to things like herpes.

I caught my ringworm from COWS ffs. I am definitely not in to cow sex (I just need to clarify that as your mind is clearly in the absolute gutter)

Lello452 · 11/03/2024 21:37

Remagirl · 11/03/2024 21:27

I couldn't live with this. It would be a case of sort it or move out.

That's what he's accusing me of saying.

I didn't. I simply said I want him to do something about it within a week. I didn't threaten to throw him out, as tempting as it was to say in the heat of the moment.

That's how childish he is. He would see himself made homeless by sheer unwillingness to address a problem, then blame it all on me for throwing him out. It's never his fault and he's never the cause of anything.

OP posts:
BoobyDazzler · 11/03/2024 21:38

I’d divorce him just for being a twat, tbh!

Lello452 · 11/03/2024 21:42

If it wasn't so frustrating it would be funny.

If you asked him at any other point what the problem is with his feet he'd tell you he thinks it's athlete's foot.

But now, because me and DS have caught this, he doesn't even have athlete's foot.

OP posts:
TwylaSands · 11/03/2024 21:44

Lello452 · 11/03/2024 21:02

Nope, neither.

I haven't had sex with him in for a very long time.

The smell does make me boke. It's horrible, then he moans and whinges when I tell him to cover his feet.

It's my birthday tomorrow and I expect tonight's argument to drag on in the form of silent treatment for days now.

this sounds like there are much bigger issues. Do you want to be married?

Lello452 · 11/03/2024 21:46

TwylaSands · 11/03/2024 21:44

this sounds like there are much bigger issues. Do you want to be married?

There are so many I don't even know where to start. This is just one symptom of the underlying issue, he has no respect for me at all.

OP posts:
Ophy83 · 11/03/2024 22:01

Can you get an antifungal shower gel and arrange for a mobile podiatrist to come round for an evening visit?

OhcantthInkofaname · 11/03/2024 22:04

No sex until it's sorted!

Lello452 · 11/03/2024 22:04

I didn't know mobile podiatrists were a thing, I'll look into that. Thank you.

OP posts:
Lello452 · 11/03/2024 22:05

OhcantthInkofaname · 11/03/2024 22:04

No sex until it's sorted!

There has been no sex for a long time and I don't see any on the horizon any time soon either 😂

OP posts:
BobLemon · 11/03/2024 22:05

What a tramp.

Minging fungus with a whiff of DARVO. He’s making my skin crawl.