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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To blame DH for ringworm and jock itch?

142 replies

Lello452 · 11/03/2024 19:23

For some time now DH has had the most god awful smelly and sweaty feet, he won't see a professional about it but in the absence of a diagnosis it's highly likely to be athlete's foot as he has all of the symptoms.

He washes them daily which does jot all and he hasn't committed to a proper treatment regime. He has used some powder he bought online inconsistently, a few times here and there. The problem persists. He has to keep his sock laundry seperate to everybody else's clothes.. it's that bad. I have insisted he wears crocs around the house as the smell of his socks when he's not wearing shoes is just too much.

He's very embarrassed about it he says, but only where professionals are concerned. He's happy for me and DC to deal with the smell which he's almost nose blind to now so he thinks we're exaggerating. I will say, this aside, he's a clean person who showers daily.

A couple of weeks ago I developed what I'm now fairly certain was sodding jock itch on the skin around my groin, inner thigh crease. I'll spare you further details.

Now, today, I received a call from my child's teacher who thinks he's developing ringworm.

Unfamiliar with ringworm, I had to look it up, low and behold it's the same thing that causes athlete's foot and jock itch.

AIBU to think his feet are the source. He doesn't think so, of course.

OP posts:
downbutnotouttake969 · 12/03/2024 08:30

If he is cable of holding down a job he could find somewhere to go. He is an adult not a child who you are responsible to house no matter how grotty and vile they can be.
Get rid, his accommodation is of no concern to you, he certainly has no concern for the health of you or his child!

Daffodilsandtuplips · 12/03/2024 09:38

He needs to actively treat this.
My dh got bad athlete foot from wearing work boots for 12 hours a day for 14 days straight every four weeks ( Oil rigger) He asked for a second pair of boots to change into halfway through his working day, this allowed them to dry out, changed his socks at the same time, soaked his feet in a solution of potassium permanganate * every day, put anti fungal powder in all of his boots and shoes and kept his towels away from the rest of the family. It took time but it worked.
*Not 100% sure if that is the name, so best to check, It’s Available from a pharmacy over the counter, it turned his nails purple for a time while he was using it but it was short lived.

babyproblems · 12/03/2024 10:03

Happy birthday op @Lello452 you deserve way better than someone who won’t treat medical issues at all and who gives you shit on your birthday!!! Hoping things improve for you & your kids. Best of luck xx

Starspangledrodeopony · 12/03/2024 10:04

Your husband is revolting and selfish.

Andthereyougo · 12/03/2024 10:23

He’s being lazy.
How difficult is it to wipe his feet over with a wipe, dry with tissue or kitchen paper then spray with Daktarin ? It’s essential he washes his hands ( or uses hand gel) afterwards
everything he uses such as towels, bath mats should be separate from others. And washed separately adding white vinegar to the wash.
If he’s touching his feet or socks then touching something or someone else without cleaning his hands it will spread.
Edit leaving bathroom floors wet will also help it to spread.

NonPlayerCharacter · 12/03/2024 10:33

Lello452 · 12/03/2024 07:32

Thank you for all of the advice it's very helpful. I'm going to put all of the bedding on a boil wash today. I've ordered three tubes of lamisil which will be delivered tomorrow and the detergent reccomended is in my weekly shop basket which I'll be finishing off today.

All of his shoes, are they beyond a boil wash? If I throw them all away I'll never hear the end of it. The sulking can go on for days and creates an awful atmosphere which has already began as predicted.

He hasn't even acknowledged my birthday this morning. He genuinely believes he is the one who has been wronged. I have never known a more pig headed man in my life.

That last bit is worrying, especially alongside the fact he doesn't care about the effect on you and your child. Is this whole thing a sign of something worse?

Allmarbleslost · 12/03/2024 10:44

Are you sure it's athletes foot? I don't understand how anyone could choose not to treat it - the itch would drive you insane!

faxnoink · 12/03/2024 10:45

Who cares if he makes you feel bad though and has a tantrum? Surely the relief of having him gone will be worth feeling bad for. You might just have to accept that to have a better quality of life without his stinking feet, you'll have to feel momentarily shit about kicking him out.

ancienticecream · 12/03/2024 11:16

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ZetuianRose · 12/03/2024 11:41

Happy birthday. Sorry you married such a selfish pig 😞

BobbyBiscuits · 12/03/2024 12:07

He is clearly very ashamed that what he thought was something he could ignore has ended up infecting his family. He clearly thought it was liveable with, but how mistaken can you be?
Definitely a podiatrist. Try not to be too annoyed with him (on the surface) as the shame might be driving him to be even more disruptive of the treatment.
I think if it's been there for years it does need a professional grade product. It must be hard, and it's bang out of order he didn't give you a nice birthday.
I'd be slathering on the daktarin on you and child and hoping he will finally get it sorted.

Lello452 · 12/03/2024 13:18

He did come and wish me a happy birthday after I last posted and he has given me my gifts and apologised. I was dreading today as I expected him to be silent and sulk, he has redeemed that part at least.

No, it's definitely not trolling. MN can verify. I've been here for years under various usernames.

As for whether I'm sure it's athlete's foot.. I'm 90% sure yes. That, possibly coupled with hyperhydrosis as his feet sweat a lot. Is there any other condition that would cause such a smell from the feet?

This is DS thigh today. It was alot lighter yesterday but he has been itching it a lot. Hopefully it will clear up quickly.

OP posts:
WearyAuldWumman · 12/03/2024 13:31

I don't know whether you'll want to say this to your DH, OP but....

I had to do everything for my late husband re preventing further occurrences of athlete's foot.

The difference is that my man was diabetic and had had a stroke which left him with hemiparesis. The poor soul tried his best, but he had to rely on me to dry between his toes, apply the cream, change his socks...

Your husband needs to grow up.

BobbyBiscuits · 12/03/2024 13:43

@Lello452 Dunno why anyone would say it was trolling? To ask about athlete's foot and other associcated fungal illness?
I'm glad it's getting better on your child. I hope yours is also improving?
My cat had ringworm and as he was daft/ a kitten he nearly scratched his own head off! He transferred it to my Mums leg, and she's diabetic. Luckily the cream got rid of it for both of them.
But your husband needs a GP and a podiatrist. The podiatrist, I'm not sure if they can actually prescribe strong meds that might be needed if it's quite 'ingrained' so to speak.

Theredfoxfliesatmidnight · 12/03/2024 13:49

Happy birthday OP 💐

CommentNow · 12/03/2024 13:50

You can rin around fixing his athletes foot but you cant make him less of a pig. This is your life with that man. It shouldn't be good enough for you or your DS who doesnt have a choice.

Thementalloadisreal · 12/03/2024 19:12

Set fire to his shoes. Birthday bonfire.

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