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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

she should used the shower before i come back

445 replies

RobynsMama · 30/06/2023 12:14

lighthearted, mostly 😂

i’m on holiday with some friends from work, first time we’ve ever been away together but we have done nights away.

I’m sharing a room with one person who doesn’t really like sunbathing or being by the pool. Fair enough we’re all quite chill and have been doing our own thing and then meeting up in the evening for dinner/drinks.

She goes back up to the room usually about 1pm to read and chill out whereas I’ll stay by the pool til it gets too chilly probably about half 6/7. We always make a plan for dinner in the group chat and the. I always put a message saying what time I expect to be back at the room because obviously will have to shower and get ready. Every day this week she’s been in the room for 6/7 hours alone and only gone in the shower when i’ve come back from the pool (it’s like she waits for me to get back then runs in there) and she takes forever meaning I have to then rush. I got fed up of this and asked when she was leaving after lunch if i could use the shower at 6 yesterday and she agreed, but when i got back to the room (at 6) she was in the shower! and took a good 45 minutes for i had to rush again.

aibu to think it’s a bit selfish if you’re in the room all day to wait to use the shower until the person you’re sharing with gets back from the pool, making them rush to get ready?

OP posts:
MrsMikeDrop · 01/07/2023 08:48

thenightsky · 30/06/2023 22:37

She must leap up like a ninja when that door beep thing goes off! Cheeky woman. Go in at 5.15 tomorrow Grin

Agree and update us!!

Emotionalsupportviper · 01/07/2023 09:02

Yes - we need updates!

Try all of the methods suggested. Keep a chart and rate success of each.

Meanwhile, I'll put the kettle on and open the good biscuits.

RhiWrites · 01/07/2023 09:33

This is brilliant. Well done OP.

So two possibilities: either she doesn’t realise the time until you are getting back or she’s deliberately power playing this to make you wait on her.

I really want you to ask her what she’s up to but wait until the last day of the trip…

ReadingSoManyThreads · 01/07/2023 17:49

Batalax · 01/07/2023 07:48

So when she said “oh I thought you got back earlier” didn’t you say, “you raced to the bathroom again, so I went out again” to make the point and challenge her?

I think you need to be a bit more assertive.

Absolutely this. She needs to be dealt with by assertiveness.

Oh and NEVER share a room with her again.

I'd have lost my shit with her after the third day.

JMSA · 01/07/2023 17:51

She's so annoying!

ThatFraggle · 01/07/2023 17:59

It's 6pm. OP we need to know what happened today, and if you've talked about it.

Mrsgreen100 · 01/07/2023 18:03

Maybe read on the balcony at 4 for an hour 🤣

Fallenangelofthenorth · 01/07/2023 18:09

ThatFraggle · 01/07/2023 17:59

It's 6pm. OP we need to know what happened today, and if you've talked about it.

And Spain is 1 hour ahead and Greece 2, assuming it's one of these places

Derailing · 01/07/2023 18:12

I would have had to address this directly by now. Politely and with a smile. I couldn’t stay quiet and play games!

honeylulu · 01/07/2023 18:14

I'm even more convinced now that she wants (a) to have her shower as late/ close to dinner as possible but (b) to be able to use the clean bathroom before you. I think you'll have to stick with your 5.30 "return" to get her in there so it's yours by 6.15. If she calls your bluff and says "oh I know you're just going back to the pool" smile sweetly and head into the shower instead. She sounds like a colossal pain. Posters are saying talk to her but you have and she doesn't care that she's pissing you off, just that she's getting what she wants.

Svet19 · 01/07/2023 18:17

RobynsMama · 30/06/2023 21:32

so i went with pp’s suggestion of coming of popping in earlier, i went up at 5.30, and i saw the door to the bathroom close as soon as i opened the room door!!! when i strolled back in at 6.10 the cheeky cow said“oh i thought you came back earlier” 😂😂😂 hahaha anyway i had a lovely shower at 6.15 and took my time getting ready. i think as someone said previously she might like having a freshly cleaned bathroom. idk. might come up for a 2pm shower tomorrow 😂

What if you need to use the loo??

younfo · 01/07/2023 18:29

I don't think I could get through the holiday without asking her why.

Honestly I'd keep doing the 5.30 thing every night and when she says something again about thinking you got in earlier, tell her that you came up for a shower but it was occupied so you decided to go back to the pool.

I would also randomly come in at 2 or 3pm for a shower some days to see how she reacts.

Missingpop · 01/07/2023 18:34

She’s just being a selfish mare & as it’s only for a short period of time you’ve just got to suck it up !!

GenerallyGreenerGrass · 01/07/2023 18:37

.

Clafoutie · 01/07/2023 18:47

RobynsMama · 30/06/2023 12:24

it’s a full 45 minutes with the shower running, she’s got exfoliating gloves and all sorts. again fair enough, but i’m a ten minute at a push if i need to wash my hair and shave my legs. if she wanted a particular time slot i would work around her

What an incredible waste of water, and also, not good for her skin.

MsRosley · 01/07/2023 18:51

Clafoutie · 01/07/2023 18:47

What an incredible waste of water, and also, not good for her skin.

Show quote history

Yeah, she's pissing me off for being so self-indulgent, as well as so obtusely selfish.

ZeldaWillTellYourFortune · 01/07/2023 18:56

I'm rather pathetically invested in this thread; need an update! ;)

Fallenangelofthenorth · 01/07/2023 18:59

@ZeldaWillTellYourFortune me too! It could be 8 or 9pm now depending where OP is, which I'm assuming is somewhere Mediterranean as that's how I'm imagining the scenario.

ZeldaWillTellYourFortune · 01/07/2023 19:04

It's the bit about the roommate being alerted by the door mechanism and bolting for the bathroom that gets me. I mean, she's such a clod that she can't even greet OP, or allow her to use the loo, or anything. Just selfishly leaps up and locks herself into the bathroom.

What a complete weirdo. I'd not be holidaying again with her! Except maybe for laughs.

Fallenangelofthenorth · 01/07/2023 19:10

Yes, I don't think I like her at all. She's not even trying to disguise her selfishness!

Poodles23 · 01/07/2023 19:51

She’s doing it on purpose, don’t tell her when you’re coming back then arrive out of the blue and jump in the shower.

WheezeAJollyGoodFellow · 01/07/2023 19:56

Amazimg update. She is a class 1 CF!

Blondeshavemorefun · 01/07/2023 20:13

She has got serious issues !!!

Running to bathroom When she hears the door alarm

Wtf

If she wants to be the first person in the shower then say you go in at 530
And I will 615

Guessing you won't ever share a room with her again

Fairydust6 · 01/07/2023 20:14

This reply has been withdrawn

The OP has privacy concerns and so we've agreed to take this down.

KoolKitten · 01/07/2023 20:15

I’m so invested in this.. need an update!!