Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

she should used the shower before i come back

445 replies

RobynsMama · 30/06/2023 12:14

lighthearted, mostly 😂

i’m on holiday with some friends from work, first time we’ve ever been away together but we have done nights away.

I’m sharing a room with one person who doesn’t really like sunbathing or being by the pool. Fair enough we’re all quite chill and have been doing our own thing and then meeting up in the evening for dinner/drinks.

She goes back up to the room usually about 1pm to read and chill out whereas I’ll stay by the pool til it gets too chilly probably about half 6/7. We always make a plan for dinner in the group chat and the. I always put a message saying what time I expect to be back at the room because obviously will have to shower and get ready. Every day this week she’s been in the room for 6/7 hours alone and only gone in the shower when i’ve come back from the pool (it’s like she waits for me to get back then runs in there) and she takes forever meaning I have to then rush. I got fed up of this and asked when she was leaving after lunch if i could use the shower at 6 yesterday and she agreed, but when i got back to the room (at 6) she was in the shower! and took a good 45 minutes for i had to rush again.

aibu to think it’s a bit selfish if you’re in the room all day to wait to use the shower until the person you’re sharing with gets back from the pool, making them rush to get ready?

OP posts:
Original poster
RobynsMama · 30/06/2023 21:32

so i went with pp’s suggestion of coming of popping in earlier, i went up at 5.30, and i saw the door to the bathroom close as soon as i opened the room door!!! when i strolled back in at 6.10 the cheeky cow said“oh i thought you came back earlier” 😂😂😂 hahaha anyway i had a lovely shower at 6.15 and took my time getting ready. i think as someone said previously she might like having a freshly cleaned bathroom. idk. might come up for a 2pm shower tomorrow 😂

OP posts:
wutheringkites · 30/06/2023 21:35

Hahaha! Well played op!

What on earth is she doing though? So strange!

Emotionalsupportviper · 30/06/2023 21:36

Whyisitsohardtochooseaname · 30/06/2023 18:13

@Wexone I commend you for being so polite as you’re grilled on your hair washing habits. The arrogance of some posters genuinely thinking they know your hair better than you is really quite something!

I was thinking that.

I think a lot has to do with how porous different types of hair are.

Mine is very short, but it still takes some rinsing to get the conditioner out. When it was longer I used to be on for ages.

JudgeRudy · 30/06/2023 21:38

I think it's selfish (and odd) to take 45 mins to shower but I don't think it's selfish to take a shower when you return. You should each get a turn to take a shower (15mins bathroom use) at the 'premium' time.
It's ureasonable for you to suggest she takes a earlier shower everytime because it suits you.

ZickZack · 30/06/2023 21:39

Your update had made me think your friend is a bit weird. I can fathom why she keeps doing this even after you asked her? It's so inconsiderate and weird.

Emotionalsupportviper · 30/06/2023 21:39

IsThisReallyPC · 30/06/2023 18:43

No I don’t agree with a 45 minute shower . Tbh I got bored reading all the winging and didn’t get that far down the paragraph.
My mistake.
But I disagree with the rest.
Especially judging how others chose to spend their holiday. I wouldn’t lie on the beach, bench or bed all day. I would be exploring the area and travelling around. We all have different ideas on what makes us happy on holiday and no one has a right to sneer at how others enjoy themselves.

Show quote history

I don't care how she spends her holiday - that's her business - but hogging the shower for that length of time EVERY NIGHT is not on. Especially when it is totally unnecessary.

Pompom2367 · 30/06/2023 21:39

She sounds like a tough roommate op

Brandspankingnewandshiny · 30/06/2023 21:51

RobynsMama · 30/06/2023 21:32

so i went with pp’s suggestion of coming of popping in earlier, i went up at 5.30, and i saw the door to the bathroom close as soon as i opened the room door!!! when i strolled back in at 6.10 the cheeky cow said“oh i thought you came back earlier” 😂😂😂 hahaha anyway i had a lovely shower at 6.15 and took my time getting ready. i think as someone said previously she might like having a freshly cleaned bathroom. idk. might come up for a 2pm shower tomorrow 😂

How bizarre. Either she's a total weridp, or maybe she thinks you're dominating the timetable and she has to work around you. You know not to share with her next time! I'd arrange and agree with her shower times for the rest of the week or ask if she wants to alternate times.

GrumpyPanda · 30/06/2023 21:55

RobynsMama · 30/06/2023 12:57

i will definitely think twice about the next time

Show quote history

Why wait till next time? I'd ask the hotel about free rooms if I were you, and leave her to hog the shower all by her lonesome. Serves her right gor her antisocial behaviour. The games about timing aside, 45 min is ridiculous.

MrsTerryPratchett · 30/06/2023 22:15

RobynsMama · 30/06/2023 21:32

so i went with pp’s suggestion of coming of popping in earlier, i went up at 5.30, and i saw the door to the bathroom close as soon as i opened the room door!!! when i strolled back in at 6.10 the cheeky cow said“oh i thought you came back earlier” 😂😂😂 hahaha anyway i had a lovely shower at 6.15 and took my time getting ready. i think as someone said previously she might like having a freshly cleaned bathroom. idk. might come up for a 2pm shower tomorrow 😂

Bwahaha

So clearly is waiting and going in when you get back. What a weirdo. I wouldn't be able to help myself and I'd ask why.

ClareBlue · 30/06/2023 22:22

I think you are correct that she doesn't like following you in after bathroom has been used. Wet floors etc. I don't think this is actually that uncommon. There's def 2 in our family who like to be in first. Not to this extent, but def have a preference.

thenightsky · 30/06/2023 22:37

She must leap up like a ninja when that door beep thing goes off! Cheeky woman. Go in at 5.15 tomorrow Grin

HeckyPeck · 30/06/2023 22:46

RobynsMama · 30/06/2023 21:32

so i went with pp’s suggestion of coming of popping in earlier, i went up at 5.30, and i saw the door to the bathroom close as soon as i opened the room door!!! when i strolled back in at 6.10 the cheeky cow said“oh i thought you came back earlier” 😂😂😂 hahaha anyway i had a lovely shower at 6.15 and took my time getting ready. i think as someone said previously she might like having a freshly cleaned bathroom. idk. might come up for a 2pm shower tomorrow 😂

I love this update 🤣

MykonosMaiden · 30/06/2023 23:18

ClareBlue · 30/06/2023 22:22

I think you are correct that she doesn't like following you in after bathroom has been used. Wet floors etc. I don't think this is actually that uncommon. There's def 2 in our family who like to be in first. Not to this extent, but def have a preference.

That still doesn't make sense. She's in the room all day and so can shower earlier.
Say the OP wants to shower at 6, she showers at 5?
Easy
Going EXACTLY when OP returns is what's odd.
Also that she's gathered all her stuff ready to leap up at a minute's notice.

Surely2023IsTheYearForMyRainbowBaby · 30/06/2023 23:37

Growlybear83 · 30/06/2023 14:39

How can anyone possibly spend more than five minutes in the shower, or maybe ten if they have long thick hair to wash?

Fuck knows. A shower only takes me 9 mins and I have mega thick hair. I might stand under the hot water slightly longer in winter when it's cold outside and I'm trying to warm up but even then it's maybe only an extra 2-3 mins. I'd be literally bored shitless stood there any longer. My OH on the other hand can quite happily stand under a hot running shower and do sod all for an hour aside standing there. Oh and having a wash

SquishyGloopyBum · 30/06/2023 23:37

Well done!

Thing is, she's on to you now. We need a new game plan for tomorrow. She's clearly doing it on purpose. We need to thwart her again tomorrow....

SquishyGloopyBum · 30/06/2023 23:41

I mean tomorrow, you could mess with her by going to room hourly from say 2pm. You need an excuse why - need suncream/book etc. She won't have a clue why though and it means she can't pre-empt you with the shower.

MykonosMaiden · 30/06/2023 23:47

SquishyGloopyBum · 30/06/2023 23:41

I mean tomorrow, you could mess with her by going to room hourly from say 2pm. You need an excuse why - need suncream/book etc. She won't have a clue why though and it means she can't pre-empt you with the shower.

Love this!

MykonosMaiden · 30/06/2023 23:48

MykonosMaiden · 30/06/2023 23:47

Love this!

Show quote history

Also don't do it as a patter. make.if an hour, 45 mins, 75 mins... You get the idea.

AnObserverInThisDarkWorld · 30/06/2023 23:48

Mmm I'm thinking she's doing more than read in the room ;)
Little bit of personal time, interrupted by you so running to hide the evidence. And maybe even finish off hence 45 minutes 😉

MrsTerryPratchett · 30/06/2023 23:50

SquishyGloopyBum · 30/06/2023 23:41

I mean tomorrow, you could mess with her by going to room hourly from say 2pm. You need an excuse why - need suncream/book etc. She won't have a clue why though and it means she can't pre-empt you with the shower.

This.

If ever I need to fuck with anyone I will remember to ask MN. Terrifying!

MykonosMaiden · 30/06/2023 23:52

AnObserverInThisDarkWorld · 30/06/2023 23:48

Mmm I'm thinking she's doing more than read in the room ;)
Little bit of personal time, interrupted by you so running to hide the evidence. And maybe even finish off hence 45 minutes 😉

Again she kno s what time the OP is coming. She can just finished before then. Not hard

Batalax · 01/07/2023 07:48

So when she said “oh I thought you got back earlier” didn’t you say, “you raced to the bathroom again, so I went out again” to make the point and challenge her?

I think you need to be a bit more assertive.

hollyblueivy · 01/07/2023 07:55

She wants the nice clean shower and doesn't want to go in after you once it's been used.

tidalway · 01/07/2023 08:14

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.