Did I do a one night stand wrong?! Getting ripped from my friends

[marrc]

My friends are currently laughing at my “failed” one night stand last night.

Very unlike me, but I met up with a guy yesterday at his place. I’ve come out of a LTR and definitely do not want a boyfriend, at all. I just wanted sex.

Anyway, he paid for me to get to his house for 3pm yesterday (friends thought the time was hilarious for some reason??), we talked for an hour or so and then had sex. After sex he said he’d like it if I stayed the night (I presume for further/morning sex). We watched a film, had sex and then spoke a bit longer. We got on well and had the same sense of humour so it wasn’t awkward or anything! Anyway, I left at around 11 this morning after staying the night (we didn’t have sex this morning, just cuddled).

friends feel I’ve done it wrong because:

1. I stayed the night? Apparently you should leave straight after the deed? (Not sure why this is weird - it’s nice to sleep next to someone and cuddle?)
2. We were laughing and talking (apparently this is “not boundaried”)
3. i arrived too early and should have gone around 10pm

Is there a rule book I’m missing out on?!? Was I a weirdo?? I thought I was being normal!

@Villssev

and??

you wouldn’t feel a touch embarrassed
A complete stranger paying for your taxi to visit him?

No one has said or even implied that long term relationships are better. The fact is most people have had one night stands and OPs doesn't sound like it was really exciting, it sounds mundane.

What’s to be jealous of?

No. It's not a particularly unusual situation in hook ups.

Sounds fine to me, but you must know this? My concern here, if anything, is why you're asking. And why you're telling your friends all the details. Could you be a bit vulnerable? Your friends don't seem the best.

Going for a shag at 3pm is inherently hilarious, sorry 🤣 But as for chatting and staying the night, how odd are they? Maybe they should just buy those little buzzy gadgets and never deal with a human again.

Although I think OP can do whatever she likes if both people are happy, it’s so weird to suggest her friends are jealous.

Surely most women can very easily have one night stands whenever they want, so I think jealousy is the wrong explanation for OPs friends behaviour.

I agree.

Ive done similar quite a few times, back for school run. Its my only child free time.

Seems a bit childish, at what time would it not be hilarious then?

More questions than the Spanish Inquisition from this one. For someone so horrified by this situation you sure do want all the sordid details. Wonder why that is … 👋

It sounds lovely to me - like two people who are nice, civilised humans, wanting a temporary connection but not in a way that dehumanises the other person.

Leaving straight after sex is very transactional and a bit sordid. Fine if that's what both parties want but it's nice to treat the other person as more than just a body to be used for convenience and remember they are a person too, with feelings. Nice to leave with a good memory.

Your 'friends' are arseholes!

The ‘rules’ just make it seem weird. Also like it’s supposed to prostitution or something.
Most women enjoy all the bits around sex like you described.
They’re being weird.

@Villssev

nope

i wouldn’t give a shit

🤷‍♀️

I feel like your ‘friends’ have had really bad one night stands.

you can totally tell all the women on here who have only ever had long term relationships and no one night stands or flings or whatever

pearl clutching r us

Your friends are idiots ! You had fun and feel fine about it . That’s all one night stands need to be .

Who hands over money for taxis anymore?

He probably booked and paid for it on an app

Re the paying for a taxi - a few years back I had a one night stand - I had met the guy before as a friend of a friend at a party - we'd been chatting via WhatsApp. One Friday evening he asked if I wanted to come over - I said I would but couldn't be arsed to get changed and get the metro. He offered to order an uber. I accepted. He paid for the uber. We had a good time. Never thought it was strange.

Even if it was it hardly warrants a shudder ha.

I’d feel like a prostitute. Absolutely awful.

Why would you you go to a total stranger's house like that? For all you know he could be a rapist or murderer.

Where you have never actually met before?

No, I'd be quite happy for someone to pay for me