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Original poster

Did I do a one night stand wrong?! Getting ripped from my friends

276 replies

marrc · 29/03/2023 14:21

My friends are currently laughing at my “failed” one night stand last night.

Very unlike me, but I met up with a guy yesterday at his place. I’ve come out of a LTR and definitely do not want a boyfriend, at all. I just wanted sex.

Anyway, he paid for me to get to his house for 3pm yesterday (friends thought the time was hilarious for some reason??), we talked for an hour or so and then had sex. After sex he said he’d like it if I stayed the night (I presume for further/morning sex). We watched a film, had sex and then spoke a bit longer. We got on well and had the same sense of humour so it wasn’t awkward or anything! Anyway, I left at around 11 this morning after staying the night (we didn’t have sex this morning, just cuddled).

friends feel I’ve done it wrong because:

  1. I stayed the night? Apparently you should leave straight after the deed? (Not sure why this is weird - it’s nice to sleep next to someone and cuddle?)
  2. We were laughing and talking (apparently this is “not boundaried”)
  3. i arrived too early and should have gone around 10pm

Is there a rule book I’m missing out on?!? Was I a weirdo?? I thought I was being normal!

OP posts:
TheObstinateHeadstrongGirl · 02/04/2023 01:42

Your friends are weirdos

nomoremerlot · 02/04/2023 06:59

didsburymanchester · 02/04/2023 01:40

@704703hey op hasn't come back to clarify the paid part. She put herself at risk of sexual assault, infection and pregnancy..., and for what?

Some good sex! What's the issue as none of that happened.

Lots of whataboutery from you.

704703hey · 02/04/2023 07:01

OP was just out of LTR and wanted no strings sex! She was quite clear what about what she wanted.

Villssev · 02/04/2023 07:02

@nomoremerlot

Does the OP ever say the sex was good? Isn’t that “whataboutery” from you?!

Villssev · 02/04/2023 07:03

Sex can’t have been that great.

They had sex once. Spent more time watching a film together

Villssev · 02/04/2023 07:07

I presume for further/morning sex)

which never happened.

So neither of you seemed particularly impressed by the your sexual experiences the previous afternoon.

It seems to me that the entire experience was a bit lacklustre. Mid afternoon someone who you have ever met pays for a taxi for you to come to his. Personally, I would like to pay for my own taxi rather than a complete stranger but 🤷‍♀️ who knows your financial situation.

anyway you rock up, speak for an hour, have sex and then… eat / TV / sleep / cuddle / leave.

Sounds more like you’ve been together for 12 years and don’t fancy each other in the least rather than an exciting liberating sexual experience

nomoremerlot · 02/04/2023 07:11

Villssev · 02/04/2023 07:02

@nomoremerlot

Does the OP ever say the sex was good? Isn’t that “whataboutery” from you?!

Well she said she had a good time, so what do you think...

Wound she have had a good time if the sex was shit?

Let me think.... 🤔

I fucking doubt it.

What a stupid comment by you.

nomoremerlot · 02/04/2023 07:13

Villssev · 02/04/2023 07:07

I presume for further/morning sex)

which never happened.

So neither of you seemed particularly impressed by the your sexual experiences the previous afternoon.

It seems to me that the entire experience was a bit lacklustre. Mid afternoon someone who you have ever met pays for a taxi for you to come to his. Personally, I would like to pay for my own taxi rather than a complete stranger but 🤷‍♀️ who knows your financial situation.

anyway you rock up, speak for an hour, have sex and then… eat / TV / sleep / cuddle / leave.

Sounds more like you’ve been together for 12 years and don’t fancy each other in the least rather than an exciting liberating sexual experience

You sound very jealous!

Devoutspoken · 02/04/2023 07:17

The paying for you to get there was a bit odd

Villssev · 02/04/2023 07:17

Oh good grief! 😂

Villssev · 02/04/2023 07:18

nomoremerlot · 02/04/2023 07:11

Well she said she had a good time, so what do you think...

Wound she have had a good time if the sex was shit?

Let me think.... 🤔

I fucking doubt it.

What a stupid comment by you.

Show quote history

Good film and food and a nice chat.

Villssev · 02/04/2023 07:18

I’d have a good time too with a good film, nice food and some chatting!

Catsmere · 02/04/2023 07:22

Sounds like your friends think a one night stand should be unfeeling and mechanical - physical lust only, no pleasure in each other’s company allowed. Your encounter sounds much more enjoyable!

nomoremerlot · 02/04/2023 07:22

@Villssev or a good shag? Why when the "main event" was sex, would the IP not be commenting on that?

Anyway I don't think OP was asking for a critique of wether you think the sex was up to par? She asked about her friends comments.

You're clearly not one for one night stands and for some reason want everyone else to feel the same, why do you think that is?

nomoremerlot · 02/04/2023 07:24

Villssev · 02/04/2023 07:18

I’d have a good time too with a good film, nice food and some chatting!

What about a good shag? If that's what you went for?

Why are you trying to DH Lange the thread and insist that OP and her ONS didn't enjoy the sex. It's really very very odd!

Were you brought up with the "good girls don't enjoy sex mantra"?

mildlydispeptic · 02/04/2023 07:50

Your friends sound weird, OP. And for heaven's sake, why would you care about their judgment about this kind of thing? They sound deeply immature. Sounds to me like you chose this bloke well and got what you needed out of it.

Villssev · 02/04/2023 08:44

nomoremerlot · 02/04/2023 07:22

@Villssev or a good shag? Why when the "main event" was sex, would the IP not be commenting on that?

Anyway I don't think OP was asking for a critique of wether you think the sex was up to par? She asked about her friends comments.

You're clearly not one for one night stands and for some reason want everyone else to feel the same, why do you think that is?

As I say… it can’t have been that good if they spent best part of 24 hours together, had sex an hour after meeting but then didn’t fancy repeating it again. Instead preferring a film and a cuddle

Villssev · 02/04/2023 08:46

I don’t want everyone else to feel the same 😐

my point was that it all sounded a touch lacklustre to me 🤷‍♀️

Villssev · 02/04/2023 08:47

And given the OP has no intention of seeing him again, I think she’d probably agree!

704703hey · 02/04/2023 08:47

Villssev · 02/04/2023 08:44

As I say… it can’t have been that good if they spent best part of 24 hours together, had sex an hour after meeting but then didn’t fancy repeating it again. Instead preferring a film and a cuddle

Show quote history

I think they had sex twice, once before and once after the film, just not in the morning

Villssev · 02/04/2023 08:52

Ah. My mistake

nomoremerlot · 02/04/2023 09:52

Villssev · 02/04/2023 08:46

I don’t want everyone else to feel the same 😐

my point was that it all sounded a touch lacklustre to me 🤷‍♀️

Twice a night sex .... lacklustre Grin

nomoremerlot · 02/04/2023 09:52

Villssev · 02/04/2023 08:52

Ah. My mistake

GrinGrinGrin

So you taking vac all the nonsense you posted?

Counselore · 02/04/2023 15:53

marrc · 29/03/2023 14:21

My friends are currently laughing at my “failed” one night stand last night.

Very unlike me, but I met up with a guy yesterday at his place. I’ve come out of a LTR and definitely do not want a boyfriend, at all. I just wanted sex.

Anyway, he paid for me to get to his house for 3pm yesterday (friends thought the time was hilarious for some reason??), we talked for an hour or so and then had sex. After sex he said he’d like it if I stayed the night (I presume for further/morning sex). We watched a film, had sex and then spoke a bit longer. We got on well and had the same sense of humour so it wasn’t awkward or anything! Anyway, I left at around 11 this morning after staying the night (we didn’t have sex this morning, just cuddled).

friends feel I’ve done it wrong because:

  1. I stayed the night? Apparently you should leave straight after the deed? (Not sure why this is weird - it’s nice to sleep next to someone and cuddle?)
  2. We were laughing and talking (apparently this is “not boundaried”)
  3. i arrived too early and should have gone around 10pm

Is there a rule book I’m missing out on?!? Was I a weirdo?? I thought I was being normal!

I love that someone thinks a one night stand should have boundaries about how much you share.. 🤣

Stewball01 · 18/04/2023 10:29

Of you're happy I'm happy.

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