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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask you for your small petty wins

224 replies

OgdensGoneNutFlake · 03/12/2022 08:03

Reading another thread about house prices and I wondered AIBU to ask you for your small petty wins in life?

Not those big, long-con revenges that require loads of planning, just the small moments when the universe served up someone or something what they deserved?

I can't think of any that aren't quite outing at the moment but I'll have a think.

OP posts:
Original poster
OgdensGoneNutFlake · 03/12/2022 08:04

N.b this is just meant to be lighthearted.

OP posts:
cliffdiver · 03/12/2022 08:38

Driving along a road, I had right of way. Row of cars parked along the opposite direction, some gaps for the opposite cars to pull over to allow cars traveling in my direction to pass (no obstructions at all on my side)

Man in a van pulls out, expecting me to stop/reverse to let him through.

I didn't. We both sat in our vehicles not moving for several minutes. Eventually he reversed and called me a "Fucking that" as I drove past.

cliffdiver · 03/12/2022 08:39

*twat, not that.

I just smiled and waved.

Bog · 03/12/2022 08:55

My wife died in the summer. Her birth mother didn't care and just wanted details of how.
I was furious and told her what I thought of her along with evidence from wife's biological grandfather that her birth mother was a nasty piece of work.
Her 4th husband then threatened to come and beat me up. I reported him to his work with the screenshot of his message and conversation with birth mother.
They've both shut up now.

Bog · 03/12/2022 08:58

Oops posted too soon.
I told my wife's half sister what happened and no doubt she has told their mother.
What she doesn't know is that I didn't actually tell her the truth as I knew that would happen and I don't think they have any right to know how my wife died as they didn't care about her when she was alive.

Prescottdanni123 · 03/12/2022 09:12

I was in an entry level job. My line manager was a horrendous bully towards me, played mind games, didn't train me properly, destroyed my self confidence for years. I tried reporting to her to her boss but, as she was the type of person who made herself indispensable, he wouldn't do anything. I quit. One of the main things that she would do was repeatedly tell me that I wasn't suited to the job. She was clearly wrong because I found a different company and worked my way up to the point that I am now doing the same role as her. I saw her in town recently and she saw me too. She came over and made an exaggerated show of being all nice nice "Oh hi, how are you? What are up to nowadays" etc and I took great pleasure in telling her that she wrong about me, I am now on the same level as her and I'm great at my job, and I will never treat anyone the way she treated me. I turned and left, leaving her in the street doing goldfish impressions.

YorkshirePuddingsGreatestFan · 03/12/2022 09:16

Grew up in a Christian household and my parents still go to Church regularly. My brother decided it's not for him which is fair enough. However he goes on and on about being an atheist and how religion is a load of rubbish in front of my parents which upsets them but they're too polite to say anything.

So I always send him a Christmas card with a nativity scene on.

Champagneforeveryone · 03/12/2022 09:20

YorkshirePuddingsGreatestFan · 03/12/2022 09:16

Grew up in a Christian household and my parents still go to Church regularly. My brother decided it's not for him which is fair enough. However he goes on and on about being an atheist and how religion is a load of rubbish in front of my parents which upsets them but they're too polite to say anything.

So I always send him a Christmas card with a nativity scene on.

This is the level of pettiness I'm here for 😆

PortiasBiscuit · 03/12/2022 09:22

I used to put a little bit of glitter on DHs pillow if he’d annoyed me. Even after a morning shower there was still traces of it for work.

Nocaloriesinchocolate · 03/12/2022 09:24

This didn’t happen to me but I took great pleasure in it. NArrow country lane, about 2 miles long with many bends. At one point it was blocked at one end by cones and notices saying road closed. At the other end it was blocked by a solid concrete barrier at a roundabout.. I was driving past the concrete barrier end when I saw a white van reversing furiously (you could tell by the driving that the driver was furious) and having difficulty because of hedges. He had obviously decided that the road closed notice didn’t apply to him and negotiated the cones at the other end. Made my day
Signed, a horrible person

FancyFelix · 03/12/2022 09:26

PortiasBiscuit · 03/12/2022 09:22

I used to put a little bit of glitter on DHs pillow if he’d annoyed me. Even after a morning shower there was still traces of it for work.

GENIUS

NippyWoowoo · 03/12/2022 10:01

Had about £5/6 on an Oyster card. Had a really horrible morning with rushing around transport and when I got to the other end, it was gone. Must have dropped it. Furious with myself. Staff let me out.

I wasn't able to report the card as lost and apply for a new one because the balance was now in negative (due to penalty charge of a tap in but no tap out recorded). It was a rough time financially and really couldn't afford to lose even a few pounds.

Kept an eye on usage to see if someone had found it and pocketed it instead of returning it. Took a couple of weeks but eventually I saw that someone had and had made one more journey with it (for those of you not familiar with Oyster cards, you're allowed one journey once you go into negative before needing to top up again).

So I waited them out. Another few weeks go by and finally, they topped it up. Nothing much, about similar to what I'd had on it before I lost it. And BAM, never hit a 'report lost' so fast (thus rendering that card useless).

I received my new card with the balance on it. Yes I paid £5 for the new one but it was a Petty Payoff

I've always handed lost Oyster cards in, I hate that people are so dishonest.

Original poster
OgdensGoneNutFlake · 03/12/2022 19:27

Yes thanks for these, this is the kind of petty enjoyment I was hoping for, especially the Christmas card!

OP posts:
justcallmebozo · 03/12/2022 21:01

Very similar to you @cliffdiver
Driving round the lanes, narrow with passing places, and a FWD comes the other way.
I pulled to the side partly onto the verge, but it seems she didn't want to get her tyres muddy by doing the same so she waved at me to reverse.
So i just sat there, looked up and smiled now and again...................

Saracen · 04/12/2022 00:35

PortiasBiscuit · 03/12/2022 09:22

I used to put a little bit of glitter on DHs pillow if he’d annoyed me. Even after a morning shower there was still traces of it for work.

I was once cross with DH, so I encouraged our toddler to decorate daddy's hard hat with about a million unicorn and fairy and Peppa Pig stickers. Some were the really sticky stickers which only come off if you soak and scrub them. I returned the hard hat to his car, putting it upside down on the floor so he wouldn't notice the stickers until he got to work.

I spent all day imagining the other builders having a laugh at his expense.

Saracen · 04/12/2022 00:51

My heart used to sink when my bus to work or home from work was being driven by The Idiot. Bad tempered, impatient, and heavy on the brakes, he always made me feel carsick on the long rural route.

One day he was involved in an accident. I had a very good view from the top deck. He really gave the other driver what-for, then collected my contact details as witness. He was completely sure he was in the right.

I was delighted to receive the form in the post from the bus company asking for a statement about what I'd seen. I explained how the bus driver's road rage had been a key factor in the collision. (The bus driver had sounded his horn and screamed while accelerating toward a vehicle which had just cut him up. The alarmed elderly car driver slammed on the brakes and the two collided.) For good measure, I mentioned that the bus driver had form for it and described a few previous incidents in which he'd been lucky to avoid causing a crash.

fatsinglereadytomingle · 04/12/2022 00:54

Another driving one ...residential street with cars parked all along one side making it a single lane.

I had right of way but was young and in a real shitty car, taxi driver didn't want to wait so decided to try and bully me to reverse all the way back. I refused to move, think we sat for about 10/15 mins before he realised I really wasn't giving in and reversed 3 car lengths back into a space. He was so angry he went too fast, mounted the pavement and hit a lamppost which cracked his light cluster. I laughed a lot while driving passed

Ilovetocrochet · 04/12/2022 01:09

And another driving one! I was being flashed by the car behind to either go faster or pull over to let him get past. It was a windy road with a 30 speed limit and I was doing about 32 or 33. Finally he overtook me, getting very close to my car forcing me to mount the kerb and took off! I was very pleased to see him a few minutes later stopped by a police man next to a camera van!

dontbringthatbirdinhere · 04/12/2022 01:45

The head builder/developer on a 3 house site around the corner from me kept shouting at me about where I (perfectly legally) parked my car because it prevented him getting his large lorry deliveries in - he needed to file for a parking suspension but clearly couldn't be bothered or didn't want to pay.

One of his tiny, over priced house sales has fallen through as the market has crashed around us. I hope he gets much less than he wants for it.

YouPutTheScrewInTheTuna · 04/12/2022 02:07

Another driving one... really brings out the best in people doesn't it!
Some asshat tailgating and flashing lights behind me, I was driving speed limit.
Mr Very Important decided to drive around me and got flashed by a speed camera as overtook me (by going over the speed limit!) on the wrong side of the road. Just desserts!

SunshineAndFizz · 04/12/2022 02:27

YorkshirePuddingsGreatestFan · 03/12/2022 09:16

Grew up in a Christian household and my parents still go to Church regularly. My brother decided it's not for him which is fair enough. However he goes on and on about being an atheist and how religion is a load of rubbish in front of my parents which upsets them but they're too polite to say anything.

So I always send him a Christmas card with a nativity scene on.

Brilliant. Loving the level of pettiness here.

RockItLikeRocketFuel · 04/12/2022 02:33

Someone once cut me up in slow traffic and then claimed I'd gone into the back of them. There was contact but only enough to bend the bumper plastic, not actually break it, there was literally no visible damage to either car. CF tried to get me to pay them £150-odd by sending me a body repair shop flyer with a "quote" handwritten on it, so I decided to fuck them and their insurance premium over by claiming against them for a recent dent on my car that they didn't cause but was near enough to the contact area to be plausible in the circumstances.

PocketBattleship · 04/12/2022 02:50

SunshineAndFizz · 04/12/2022 02:27

Brilliant. Loving the level of pettiness here.

Show quote history

I doubt he even notices.

MammaWeasel · 04/12/2022 02:52

When my ex knobhead annoyed me I used to clean the bathroom taps with his toothbrush.

Saracen · 04/12/2022 12:50

I was hanging well back from the large slow-moving vehicle in front of me with the flashing amber lights as it did its job. The driver of the immaculate sports car behind me kept flashing me impatiently, then finally overtook and slid into the gap between me and... the gritter! 😂