Wondering … would you stay with someone who is a brilliant parent but struggles with money?

[Broccolicelery]

Someone who is a brilliant parent to two year old but contributes nothing really in the way of finances.

Contributes nothing in finances? But do they clean, cook, do laundry, look after child? That's not nothing.
There are many men and to a lesser extent women who are ok with their partner not earning money but contribute in other ways: available hands on parent, looks after the home or garden, volunteers or studies, cares for elderly parents or disabled family members, looks after animals. Such partners usually don't have money worries though and/or traditional (or in case of a woman bread winner liberal) values.

Way more context needed. Why don't they contribute? Are they the primary carer for the DC and childcare is impractical for some reason (e.g. child with additional needs, expense, parenting style preference)? Is it likely they will contribute in the future, do they want to, are they able to, do they have significant barriers? Can the other partner cover all three (+) people's living expenses, are they happy doing so? Are we struggling for money? Is the child being brought up solely by me and this person, or are there other parent(s) involved, what's the story with them? Define "brilliant parent", is this an empty way of saying that the child loves them and you don't want to split up because it would be upsetting? Or are they actively taking the strain off the other parent and therefore providing value?

Depends. Are they a SAHP and do lots in regards to childcare, housework, etc? Or do they do nothing all day? Or do they work and just blow all their money on crap?

I agree more info is needed. Define 'brilliant' parent? What are the reasons for not earning? Is the family financially struggling as a result? Is the other parent resentful?

Dh and I both work to support our family, he wouldn't be happy with my being a sahm and I wouldn't with him being a sahd. Our family is financially better off with us both working although I am part time. Other families work differently and are perfectly happy with one parent being a sahp.

I’m being vague and I know it’s really annoying.

Parent A works FT and pays all bills, mortgage, etc. they earn around £75000.

Parent B works PT earns £24,000 and doesn’t contribute to mortgage and bills but does pay for nursery for days in work. Pays for grocery shop sometimes.

Do they do most of the housework? No need to be too vague.

Probably most but not all and probably not brilliantly.

This is pretty much my set up. Except I do contribute to mortgage and bills because why wouldn’t I?! They’re my mortgage and bills too!

£24k PT isn’t struggling with money! I’d say their earnings are fine.

Yes, I would - I am! So do the majority of men with wives who are SAHMs.

£24K part time is good! Are they they primary parent?

'struggles with money' usually means poor money management.

But your issue seems to be doesn't earn enough?
Even though they do most of the childcare?

Parent B should pay 1/3 of bills etc.

And 'doesn't pay towards bills but does pay nursery fees' is just a mindset thing.

The money spent on nursery fees could be directed to the mortgage, and the other parent could pay the nursery fees.

I’m being vague and I know it’s really annoying
It's not annoying, it's just bloody stupid expecting advice with no context.

That sounds fine to me. Parent A earns more so contributes more to household bills, parent B pays for nursery, does most of the housework and presumably does the childcare on their days off. Do parent A and parent B have equal "fun" money?

Sounds fair to me. As others have said paying nursery fees is contributing to bills.

Depends what Parent B is contributing to the home. If they are doing the lion's share at home offsetting the part time hours then they are contributing. Especially if the child is 2, my answer would differ slightly if they were in school.

The parent who works part time needs to a) be contributing proportionately to family finances and b) picking up proportionately more of the household chores.

I wouldn’t stay with a partner who was both insisting on working part time and also refusing to “make up” for their reduced contribution to family finances in chores and childcare.

Set up sounds fine. Parent A is more than able to cover all expenses and Parent B is contributing?? Why is that "contributes nothing really"? And why does all the childcre come out of their salary, surely the other parent also needs childcare.

Are you familiar with the concept of financial abuse and control?

Why aren't finances pooled?

Sounds reasonable to me.

Your OP is misleading. Working PT and paying nursery fees and grocery bill is not the same as "contributing nothing really in the way of finances" at all is it?

Where did OP say they "insisted" on working part time? Presumably they work part time due to childcare costs, and OP said parent B pays for the nursery.

Someone who is a brilliant parent to two year old but contributes nothing really in the way of finances.

works PT earns £24,000 and doesn’t contribute to mortgage and bills but does pay for nursery for days in work. Pays for grocery shop sometimes.*

So it’s not nothing then. 24k is a very good part time salary. Obviously they are on a lot less than their partner but I would expect that person to pay more than part time childcare and occasionally some food. I imagine 74k but paying all the bills properly has less money than the 24k part time worker who had the luxury of free time too. Obviously they are with the child but many people working long hours would prefer more time with their children.