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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would this bother you?

110 replies

Busybeedle · 27/06/2022 22:38

I was shopping in Sainsbury’s and thought I’d take a quick look at the undies section. A man (in his 60’s maybe) was standing in front of the bras just staring at them. At first I thought he was with someone and just zoning out while she was looking at knickers but no, he seemed to be on his own.

I was opposite looking at the knickers myself for a little while so I noticed him just standing there, entranced by the array of bras. After I turned to carry on my shopping, I saw him dart out his hand and start awkwardly fondling a couple of the bras. Then he looked about shiftily and shuffled off.

I don’t normally notice or care about men in the wimmens section, I assume they’re either with someone or looking to buy something. But he just seemed ‘off’ somehow.

YABU: Who are you to question his motives/Wouldn’t bother me
YANBU: Seems a bit odd/Would bother me

OP posts:
BiFoldChampion · 27/06/2022 22:39

Dirty bastard

LondonQueen · 27/06/2022 22:40

Seems a little odd.

Original poster
Busybeedle · 27/06/2022 22:40

BiFoldChampion · 27/06/2022 22:39

Dirty bastard

😁

OP posts:
Furrybutts · 27/06/2022 22:40

It wouldn't bother me one bit as long as he didn't try and engage in conversation with me, but I can't say you are bu.

spotcheck · 27/06/2022 22:44

For heaven's sake - he could have been sent to buy one for his wife or mother.
Fuck, I've clocked some hours in front of the boys underwear section in my time- I guess I was a perv?

Original poster
Busybeedle · 27/06/2022 22:45

spotcheck · 27/06/2022 22:44

For heaven's sake - he could have been sent to buy one for his wife or mother.
Fuck, I've clocked some hours in front of the boys underwear section in my time- I guess I was a perv?

Fair enough, but did you fondle them shiftily then shuffle off without buying any?

I get your point though, he may have just been a bit nervous about judgemental harridans like myself!!

OP posts:
CherrySocks · 27/06/2022 22:47

His motives seem entirely clear.

XenoBitch · 27/06/2022 22:47

I have fondled bras before, then walked off. Am I a perv too?
Who exactly is he harming by perving at bras in a shop?

Original poster
Busybeedle · 27/06/2022 22:49

XenoBitch · 27/06/2022 22:47

I have fondled bras before, then walked off. Am I a perv too?
Who exactly is he harming by perving at bras in a shop?

Never insinuated he was harming anyone.

Just that he seemed a bit odd and furtive

OP posts:
Vionnet · 27/06/2022 22:49

Could be a cross dresser gauging size/fit. Depends if it was full on groping, or something less...weird.

Thesearmsofmine · 27/06/2022 22:49

Maybe he was looking/feeling for himself? But too embarrassed to buy.

Original poster
Busybeedle · 27/06/2022 22:51

Vionnet · 27/06/2022 22:49

Could be a cross dresser gauging size/fit. Depends if it was full on groping, or something less...weird.

He was very conventionally dressed in a stereotypically ‘masculine’ fashion.

But who knows what he had on underneath his cardigan…

OP posts:
Vionnet · 27/06/2022 22:54

He was very conventionally dressed in a stereotypically ‘masculine’ fashion

Grin sorry...I meant a private crossdresser, hence the possible furtiveness. If he'd been in a halter neck and skater skirt, I think you'd have mentioned it. Grin

Original poster
Busybeedle · 27/06/2022 22:56

Vionnet · 27/06/2022 22:54

He was very conventionally dressed in a stereotypically ‘masculine’ fashion

Grin sorry...I meant a private crossdresser, hence the possible furtiveness. If he'd been in a halter neck and skater skirt, I think you'd have mentioned it. Grin

😂
yes, somehow i think I’d have found it less odd iyswim

OP posts:
TildaRae · 27/06/2022 23:00

No this wouldn’t bother me. Why would it? I’ve also spent time looking at bras and feeling the material to gauge if they would fit as I hate trying stuff on in the shop.

HollowTalk · 27/06/2022 23:06

spotcheck · 27/06/2022 22:44

For heaven's sake - he could have been sent to buy one for his wife or mother.
Fuck, I've clocked some hours in front of the boys underwear section in my time- I guess I was a perv?

Do you really think his mother has sent him to buy her knickers for her? Really?

saleorbouy · 27/06/2022 23:16

Maybe he was studying the fastenings and how to undo them before he headed out on a date!😍

CafeCremeMerci · 27/06/2022 23:18

I know a 60yo man who would look 'shifty' 'fondling the fabric' who would then rush off without buying anything...I'm rather attached to the silly git actually! But not known for his shopping ability for anything, let alone nice undies. Pretty good once he's got me out of them though, so I keep him around!!

Wasn't him though, he hates Sainsbury!!

My neighbour is a bit older but he likes wearing them as 'ladies underwear is so much nicer', he'd have been checking out the fabric, can't have been him either though as he rarely leaves without buying something (then dashing off to show me!).

Maybe you watching him embarassed him so much he couldn't concentrate on his wank purchase

stepuporshutup · 27/06/2022 23:21

BiFoldChampion · 27/06/2022 22:39

Dirty bastard

🤣🤣🤣

TheWayoftheLeaf · 27/06/2022 23:22

Probably wanted to buy one as a gift (new lady, elderly mum etc) and was nervous and realised he didn't have a clue what to do. Half hearted attempt and then gave up...

lljkk · 27/06/2022 23:24

No it would't bother me. He can admire women's underwear if he likes, as long as his hands weren't down his pants just before he touched, I can't make myself mind.

ladydimitrescu · 27/06/2022 23:28

I'd assume he was buying for a partner, but then I don't just assume all men are wrong'uns.

DoncasterHombre · 27/06/2022 23:47

He was perhaps sent to the supermarket with a list by his wife and got absently caught out in a daze?

What was that Kim Carnes song?

Tin of tuna, box of tissues
Block of butter and some tofu
Rice and couscous, some kind of cake
And don't forget the bog-brush
He's at the shops to buy pies, but he's got Sainsbury's bra-bra eyes

Or maybe he was looking for something to grow tomatoes in?

DoncasterHombre · 27/06/2022 23:56

I'm sorry OP but I've just read your post again and all the talk of being "entranced by the array of bras", the "darting hand", "fondling", "shifty-ness" and . . . particularly . . . . "furtiveness" have made me think he was a dirty ol' bastard out for a grope of undies in Sainsbury's. YANBU (You Assessed Naughty Bra Urchin).

pimlicoanna · 28/06/2022 00:01

I'd assume he was tasked to buy one for his wife.