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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think my new colleagues hate me?

108 replies

immersivereader · 17/11/2021 19:32

Recently started a new job, WFH 100% of the time.

I suggested that we all meet for lunch (team of 7) which my boss seemed on board with. He's organised the lunch for December 21st. Which to me seems a bit late really but anyway.

DH said that everyone will dislike me as all the team members love the whole WFH thing and won't want to trudge downtown.

Also, boss sent the email invite and wrote some words in Italian (Italian resto) and I replied to all, in Italian, saying looking forward to it, etc.

Am I an enthusiastic oddball?

OP posts:
Chr1stmasCarole · 17/11/2021 19:34

Suggesting a meal sounds fine, a nice idea.
Replying in Italian..... yeah show-offy I'd certainly be rolling my eyes at you.
Maybe just relax and give yourself time to get to know people though.

TheLightSideOfTheMoon · 17/11/2021 19:36

Meh, who cares?

You’re happy and appear confident. And you speak Italian.

I’d enjoy being you for a day.

ObnoxiousFeminist · 17/11/2021 19:37

@TheLightSideOfTheMoon

Meh, who cares?

You’re happy and appear confident. And you speak Italian.

I’d enjoy being you for a day.

This
Mum6776 · 17/11/2021 19:37

No they'll like going out, once they're there.

ArblemarchTFruitbat · 17/11/2021 19:37

I enjoy WFH but I'd be fine with going for a Christmas lunch - I would be unlikely to bother with an evening do, but during the day would be fine.

Italian phrases - your boss set the scene with the language - I don't think I'd think anything of this being carried on by someone in the replies.

Ultimately, your boss knows your team better than your DH and I'm sure he used his judgement when agreeing to the lunch idea.

WinifredTheWondrous · 17/11/2021 19:39

Ah don't worry. You can't please everyone. Some people will love going for lunch. Some won't, but they don't have to come.

Replying in Italian is a bit nerdy, but I love nerdy people! I'm sure you'll be able to laugh about it later if any of them end up being good friends.

Original poster
immersivereader · 17/11/2021 19:41

Maybe I can just work with you folks instead?!

GrinWine

OP posts:
Fullyloaded · 17/11/2021 19:42

Umm... resto as in restaurant? He wasn't speaking Italian in that case??

WinifredTheWondrous · 17/11/2021 19:42

I'd love that! Molto bene....erm...vino....come stai?

(If anyone who is Italian reads this, I am so sorry for my terrible Italian language skills)

SexyNeckbeard · 17/11/2021 19:43

I was with you until you replied to the email in Italian - that's a bit odd

amymel2016 · 17/11/2021 19:47

I would be fine with a Christmas lunch out but replying in Italian would seem a bit odd to me

Bigoldhag · 17/11/2021 19:51

How does your DH know that the team don’t like trudging out for lunch? He sounds like he is projecting.

You sound enthusiastic and I’d probably roll my eyes at the Italian lol, but not in a particularly serious way!

fourminutestosavetheworld · 17/11/2021 19:54

Well if they don't want to trudge into town they don't have to do they? It's not a court summons or on pain of death.

Personally I wouldn't hate you. I'd think you were lovely and confident and sociable. I wouldn't come to the event and I'd be worried that this new team member was going to plan such things regularly, but I'd see that as my problem not yours.

PAFMO · 17/11/2021 19:55

@Fullyloaded

Umm... resto as in restaurant? He wasn't speaking Italian in that case??
Exactly.
liliainterfrutices · 17/11/2021 20:02

@immersivereader

Recently started a new job, WFH 100% of the time.

I suggested that we all meet for lunch (team of 7) which my boss seemed on board with. He's organised the lunch for December 21st. Which to me seems a bit late really but anyway.

DH said that everyone will dislike me as all the team members love the whole WFH thing and won't want to trudge downtown.

Also, boss sent the email invite and wrote some words in Italian (Italian resto) and I replied to all, in Italian, saying looking forward to it, etc.

Am I an enthusiastic oddball?

I would love you for writing in Italian. I find it really upsetting that we are such a monoglot nation. And it sounds like a lovely event. You are an asset to the team.
Interrobanger · 17/11/2021 20:05

Does your DH usually piss all over your chips?

lomoloko · 17/11/2021 20:07

Your DH is the one who has invented this problem. Why would he do that, do you think?

PennyWus · 17/11/2021 20:09

You sound nice. Why on earth would they hate you?

MultiStorey · 17/11/2021 20:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Fahrted · 17/11/2021 20:10

How does your DH know that the other team members enjoy WFH? Is he just assuming? I'd loathe WFH and would be delighted if a colleague suggested going out.

I would be a bit eye-rolly at the Italian as I speak several languages but only use them when speaking or writing to native speakers of any particular language - and then, they quite often choose to use English. But I'd still want to go.

Lasair · 17/11/2021 20:11

Does your husband usually put you down?

littlebigtiger · 17/11/2021 20:12

Well, presumably they can decline, if it's not compulsory.

I work in a team of introverts (data), we had a very sweet new person join that tried to arrange some social things. Some people went, some people didn't.

Is it in work time?

ihavespoken · 17/11/2021 20:13

Your dh sounds like a right grump! I’m sure you will all have a great time

Katerinakaterinaki · 17/11/2021 20:13

@Fullyloaded

Umm... resto as in restaurant? He wasn't speaking Italian in that case??
She was just explaining why he said something in Italian, lol, not saying that he said "Italian resto" as an Italian phrase
AtrociousCircumstance · 17/11/2021 20:13

The issue here is your H eroding your peace of mind with his shitty little assumption whispered in your ear.