Why do men...

[VsgKitt]

I was stood in a toilet que recently with some lairy idiots sat besides.
The men were talking loudly and occupying 2 tables which the que was in the middle of.

I'm fat. I know this. I was ironically days away from bariatric surgery.

It was the day, I wasn't dressed up, no make up. Just minding my own business.

One said loudly to the table behind me 'if this is the level of women out here in XYZ we should have just stayed at home'

They laughed and another said 'two fat ladies, 88'

I didn't even look at them. I didn't give them the satisfaction. I just ignored them and same when I came out.

I don't understand it. I really don't. Yes I'm fat. I'm 36. I'm not going to be attractive at all to these 20 odd year olds. I don't aim to be. I'm just minding my own business.

I couldn't ever imagine singling out a stranger with the sole intention of causing them pain emotionally.

I find it so strange.

I'd have boxed them. I wish I could give you a hug. They're cunts

Well done for holding your head high, dicks being dicks

@MsTSwift

It really is not the case that “women are just as bad”. Don’t know what your agenda is but that is flat out wrong. The abuse from men to women is endemic.

Exactly, there is truly something wrong if @Peanutsandchilli can't see this. Women don't go up to other women or other men and try and abuse and insult them in public. They just don't. To say they do is blatant lying. And there is a POWER imbalance with men vs women that isn't at play with the reverse. Women don't wolf whistle other women and men, they don't grope them on, or spike their drinks. I question the (MRA/Meninist) agenda of anyone denying FACTS AND REALITY.

@converseandjeans

They're being knobs - don't let them get to you.

Difficult though. Especially if it happens repeatedly.

I remember being referred to as ‘that’ by someone my friend knew. It’s hard to shake that sort of thing off.

I call it small dick energy .

@IceLace100

I don't know why people keep comparing men and women here.

Also a lot of "not all men" which grinds my gears.

A "not all men" comment is a perfectly valid response to an "all men" comment.

A "not all men" comment is a perfectly valid response to an "all men" comment.

No one has said that. They have said, "it's always men". Because most of the time it is.

The pretzel twisting to try to pretend street harassment is 50/50 is hilarious. Groups of workmen are are likely to be groups of workwomen whistling at men going past and shouting, "how many of them to the pinned" and "cheer up love"? Bollocks. A few drunk women in groups I'll give you. But the constant shite in the street on an average Tuesday, stone cold sober, that's always men.

Read the thread title.

@MrsTerryPratchett

A "not all men" comment is a perfectly valid response to an "all men" comment.

No one has said that. They have said, "it's always men". Because most of the time it is.

The pretzel twisting to try to pretend street harassment is 50/50 is hilarious. Groups of workmen are are likely to be groups of workwomen whistling at men going past and shouting, "how many of them to the pinned" and "cheer up love"? Bollocks. A few drunk women in groups I'll give you. But the constant shite in the street on an average Tuesday, stone cold sober, that's always men.

This!! It’s not even comparable!

@AICM

Read the thread title.

It says ‘men’, not EVERY SINGLE MAN 🤷‍♀️

God, it’s weird and worrying that some posters seem just to have landed on Planet Earth and not noticed that men are massively, massively over-represented in the ‘being a total dick in public’ stakes! Presumably these posters will also dispute that men commit the overwhelming majority of crime?!

Yes it says men. With no further qualification.

If it said far too many men I would have agreed.

Men commit the overwhelming majority of crime.

@AICM

Yes it says men. With no further qualification.

If it said far too many men I would have agreed.

🙄 Why play word games? You know full well what OP meant. You understand the dynamics between men and women. You get that men are the problem here. Your nit-picking just comes across as awkwardness at best, or trying to undermine the women who are naming the problem at worst.

You're handing men a get out of jail free card if you use an 'all men' comment. It invites a NAMALT comment for which there is no defence.

It's also insulting to my dad, brothers and nephews.

Has anyone actually said ‘all men’?

@AICM A "not all men" comment is a perfectly valid response to an "all men" comment.

No, it really is not. It really, honestly is not. If something is basically all men, then that truth doesn't need someone doing the NAMALT to save men's feelings and pander to the men on here. A truth doesn't need someone to NAMALT it.

Women can no doubt be equally as nasty as men but as a group they do not demand men's attention or impose themselves upon men in public spaces in the same way that men do to women.

[quote SamiReed1]**@AICM* A "not all men" comment is a perfectly valid response to an "all men" comment.*

No, it really is not. It really, honestly is not. If something is basically all men, then that truth doesn't need someone doing the NAMALT to save men's feelings and pander to the men on here. A truth doesn't need someone to NAMALT it.[/quote]
Yes it really is.

@Peanutsandchilli

Men don't. Utter cunts do. There'll be women who judge overweight men in exactly the same way.

I'm sorry this happened to you, but it's not a man thing.

Don’t be silly. The world is not full of groups of women shouting ‘Two fat bastards!’ at a queue of tired male travellers minding their own business at an airport loo, because women generally don’t suffer from the delusion that men exist to be decorative for the female gaze.

No one said all men. ‘Men’ clearly means ‘men as a class of people’. Which is accurate here. It is a societal problem that is caused by the class ‘men’.

Why some women are so quick to defend men’s poor feelings in scenarios like this is beyond me. Your dad/brother/nephews don’t care.

‘Not all men’ isn’t a valid response when nobody has said all men

@Shakespeare79

No one said all men. ‘Men’ clearly means ‘men as a class of people’. Which is accurate here. It is a societal problem that is caused by the class ‘men’.

Why some women are so quick to defend men’s poor feelings in scenarios like this is beyond me. Your dad/brother/nephews don’t care.

Indeed.

Good luck recovering from the surgery, OP.

We are women, unique and varied, not walking Tinder photos. I think an awful lot of men would like the option of swiping random women off into the sky, to be exploded in a hail of electronic tinkles and explosion sparkles, for the sin of not being fuckable in their eyes. The fact we would never even consider fucking them never seems to come up, strangely enough
^ this is brilliant and fucking tragic. It rings true for so many of these troglodytes.

I don't know about all men but the vast majority of us have it in us. When younger, when drunk, and especially when trying to impress the group by pushing boundaries. I'm sure I've been a complete arse at some points in my life. hopefully not to the degree in the op but can I say hand on heart I've never been that insensitive? I don't know. Even supposedly good men can be shit at times. Anyway to the op sorry for those guys being knobs, you definitely didn't deserve it, and good luck in the future.

That's so fucking rude.
I'd have told someone to hold my earrings and bag..