Locked Parking Thread 3(!!!))

[BlueEyesWhiteDragon]

You guys need to stop filling the thread when nothing is happening!!

In the meantime I had the most amazing nights sleep last night. Absolutely full of food and had an amazing day and frankly this morning I couldn't care if he's there for 6 months

Op, did you on FB to say it was all sorted?

@friendlycat

Good Lord this thread certainly encompasses a lot of different aspects ... Primarily CF Man

Excellent advertising for Toby Carveries (they are going to be so pleased with this free marketing)

Some splendid recipes for yorkshire puddings

Potential dating site for DB with willing candidates already swooning

Next year's Calendar - Full Monty meets Countryside Tractor Twist

Next year's box office Smash Movie

Full Monty- Sean Bean declined the lead role but could he make up for it in the role of DH?

[quote Mummylovesmonkeys]Love the idea of Laurence Fox as CF, but unfortunately......

[/quote] Ah, yes but he's an actor and so could channel all he hates about cyclist into the

Think it makes him perfect

Op we’re really sorry we’ve almost used half your new thread already. It’s not like your a farmer with a reasonable excuse not to constantly update mn.

Breaking cover - been following this from the off and am dumbfounded that CPF has STILL not got his car back.

What a tool.

But OP, you and DB are legends. Don’t blink. You got this.

He wanders through the forest looking for his car. He starts to feel the pangs of hunger. He hears voices and laughter. Beneath the trees where nobody sees, Teddy Bears are having their picnic
But the Teddy Bears refuse to share their marvellous things to eat and laugh him out of the glade, humiliated.

Hungrier and hungrier he wanders through the forest. He finds a cottage and smells Yorkshire puddings. He breaks into the cottage and is about to eat the largest Yorkshire when three angry bears return. He flees, tummy rumbling.

At last, barely able to walk he is so hungry, he came across an edible house and start to munch on it ---- unaware that a cauldron of boiling herbs awaits him inside.......

[quote Mummylovesmonkeys]Love the idea of Laurence Fox as CF, but unfortunately......

[/quote] No, that works because he would jump at the chance to portray CF as a total twat.

I cannot be the only American who has read all three threads and has been left in awe at how much the British can endure without shooting someone.

Cross post @LavenderAskew!

ShamelessCurtainTwitcher

That wouldn't be polite. We just shake our heads in bewilderment or seethe.

@ShamelessCurtainTwitcher

I cannot be the only American who has read all three threads and has been left in awe at how much the British can endure without shooting someone.

Congratulations. You have won the internet for today.

@ShamelessCurtainTwitcher

I cannot be the only American who has read all three threads and has been left in awe at how much the British can endure without shooting someone.

We're too polite ShamelessCurtainTwitcher

(plus we tend not to have guns)

@ShamelessCurtainTwitcher

I cannot be the only American who has read all three threads and has been left in awe at how much the British can endure without shooting someone.

Nah, we just quietly and unshowily boil with resentment forever.

We may escalate to a cutting remark if really pushed, mind you.

I hope thiese threads go into the classic collection!

Can I suggest Andrew Cotter's
Olive and Mabel for the OP dogs?

Am so getting into this. (Making very slow progress with painting the conservatory walls). How about a cameo role for Sean Bean in a flashback scene to the Forest Ranger in the OP’s tale about them deliberately felling a tree onto the roof of a car blocking the track. As I think she said it was about 20 years ago, there could also be a touching little scene showing his death thereby upholding his tradition of never living to the end of a film!

Richard Madden for DB!

@Mummylovesmonkeys some farmers do, specially if they hunt, never asked to borrow friends pigeon shooting firearms before, promise

@ShamelessCurtainTwitcher

I cannot be the only American who has read all three threads and has been left in awe at how much the British can endure without shooting someone.

OMG that made me howl.

I mean, quite - we don't go around shooting people but it isn't because we aren't rolling cauldrons of resentment. It's more the terrible worry of whatever will we SAY to the relatives?

Nothing more awkward than having to introduce yourself to a shocked family over a corpse - it makes shaking hands a bit of a reach, and if you invited them for tea and Custard Creams they'd have to walk around their deceased, still-bleeding loved one and then THEY'D have to apologise to YOU for treading blood into your carpet because of course it's terribly rude to ASK people to take their shoes off but also terribly rude for them not to OFFER to take their shoes off and you can see how it all would spiral and frankly it's just too ghastly to contemplate

OP please shoot him! Or at least sit outside your door on a rocking horse with a shotgun.

@ShamelessCurtainTwitcher

I cannot be the only American who has read all three threads and has been left in awe at how much the British can endure without shooting someone.

We only have OP's word that he hasn't been back, maybe DB got a bit twitchy

Op's gone quiet because she and her DB are outside patting down the topsoil in preparation for laying the new patio.

@ShamelessCurtainTwitcher

I cannot be the only American who has read all three threads and has been left in awe at how much the British can endure without shooting someone.

Hilariously true, sadly. People would have died back in some red states.

Doesn’t barn lime hide terrible smells?🧐

I think CF needs to be played by a wimpering, cowardly man child…Ian Beale? (I haven’t watched eastenders in years, but can’t imagine he’s changed much).