To lock the jackass in (parking thread)

[BlueEyesWhiteDragon]

I live in a rural location which is very popular with walkers / bikers / horse riders etc. It's heaving today for some unknown reason as the weather is rubbish!

We have 2 driveways. One which was with the original cottage then a small bit of garden then a second which leads to the additional land we have. The second driveway the forestry commission have a ROW over as the track continues up into the forest. Next to that driveway is a footpath. Both driveways have gates at either end and both say private property/dogs running loose. (Diagram attached - not to scale!)

I have just had a straw delivery and so opened the second driveway gates to let the farmer in and trundled round the back to show him where to put them. He's unloaded and driven off and I've gone to lock the gates back up. Literally as he's driven off and I'm walking down a guy has pulled in the gates and parked up and 3 kids have jumped out and he started unloading their bikes.

I politely ask him to move as he's on private land and he says there are no signs he thought it was a parking spot. I say they are on the gate and it's clearly an enclosed piece of land that is not a parking space and he says he couldn't see them as the gates were open but he'll only be a few minutes. No problem, I say, I'll pop back and shut the gates in 5. Off I toddle.

I have returned and his car is still there and he has gone. He has left a note on the windscreen which says "had to park here no other spaces". I mean WTF?!

WIBU to shut the gates, padlock the fucker in, block the gates with my truck AND then disappear for at least 48 hours?

Yep, do it. You said you'd be back in 5 minutes, he didn't listen, serves him right.

I'd say geese over peacocks all the time. Our local school has peacocks and they are often not even on the school site during the day. They wander all over town all the time just swanning about 2 or 3 miles away. Granted they always make their way back to school but they are like prisoners on day release and sod off all the time!

I think they are scared of the dogs. They can't get onto driveway2 but it's possible they think they can. If I shout them in then its obvious I'm here and then I don't think id have the nerve to refuse to let him leave immediately. But if I don't its a standoff between him and the dogs and the dogs are currently winning!

Oh please when he knocks to ask you to open the gate say
I'll be round in 5 minutes with the key - 45 minutes later wonders over :)

I'd love to know what kind of upbringing creates a person that behaves like this. I'd also be interested to know how they get on in life generally - work, relationships etc. It's so antisocial that I assume they behave badly in other areas of their lives too.

OP, being serious, are you there on your own? I know he has the kids with him, but if he looks in anyway angry, I wouldn't go out to him on my own.

Dammit, I do usually read through but I missed this was 8 pages long!

Hee hee - yeah, just leave him to sweat until he rings the door. Put earphones in and pretend you were listening to loud music so couldn't hear the dogs.

Leave him where he is. Don’t rescue him. Not at least until he has the decency to apologise and ask you to let him out.

Well this is going to be interesting. I hope you make him wait and sweat for a considerable amount of time.

Yes, that!

‘I’ll be out in five’

Then go have a bath/watch an episode of your favourite show/have a late lunch/whatever you like, and saunter on out about an hour later.

He’d be a bit stupid to be angry with dogs protecting her. Is it raining?

So currently they are all just standing by my truck, and the dogs are in the garden looking at them like what are you doing? One of the kids tried to climb the gate but that made the dogs bark again so they retreated.

He sent his child over the gate??

And if he gets aggressive in any way then he can stew for even longer. Cannot stand people who take the piss like that, and teach their children to be just as entitled.

What a wanker. I bloody detest entitled sods!

You have to hold out, OP. Don't crumble now!

I've been told what I need is geese or peacocks as they apparently the most territorial little psychos and then noone would be able get near. Having been attacked by a goose as a child I can guarantee one flying at your face all wings and hisses is terrifying

You absolutely must get guard geese (not peacocks). Geese were used to guard distillery warehouses

www.bbc.co.uk/archive/guard-geese-at-whisky-distillery/zj8hqp3

@BlueEyesWhiteDragon

So currently they are all just standing by my truck, and the dogs are in the garden looking at them like what are you doing? One of the kids tried to climb the gate but that made the dogs bark again so they retreated.

This is MN OP. You realise it is totally normal to not answer the door to people

You need to add another sign to your gate in anticipation of the next prick who thinks your drive is fair game
"unauthorised parking £50 per hour"

Passes OP a lunchtime ... you can't drink and drive, you know!

He'll have to get an uber home and come back tomorrow, shall we say about 6am? 😂

Do not under any circumstances make the first move- if he wants to get out then he needs to come to you and ask. If he gets aggressive rather than apologetic then go inside, lock the door and call for back up (whether that's a neighbour, friend, brother, police etc)

Watching!!!

Waiting with bated breath! Don't back down to him, he thinks he's entitled!

Jesus, why doesn't he just put the kids in the car if they're scared
What a complete bozo
Sit and wait OP stay strong, wait for the prey to come to you

I'm so excited, I've never read a parking thread whilst it's ongoing!

Stand your ground, OP. You have done nothing wrong and this guy is a CF. He shouldn't have taken advantage of your kindness.

i dont think, realistically, you can leave him there for long. I would let him stew a little longer, then go call the dogs in.

Shameless placemark, please keep us updated!!