Too embarrassed for hairdresser

[LEMtheoriginal]

My hair desperate needs cutting but im too embarrased to go to the hair dresser.

Can anyone give tips for cutting myself?

Why are you embarrassed?

Why are you too embarrassed to go to a hairdresser?

What? Isnt that what hairdressersare paid to do - fix the hair of people who need haircuts?

Any decent hairdresser would love the transformation job.

Iirc, haven't you been quite ill, lately?

Overweight , bad hair, bad teeth. Just not really fair on hair dresser and i know they would be either cross that i wasted thier time or grossed out.

I understand anxiety, so as much as I will assure you that a professional hairdresser won't be grossed out, I get that you don't feel confident enough to go.
Can a friend or family member help at all? It is fairly hard to cut your own hair nicely...do you have straight hair/curly/thick/thin/coloured?
Or perhaps a mobile hairdresser would make you more comfortable rather than sitting in a salon?

Pickachew yes i have but im getting better. I kniw that seems all very drama llama but i feel humiliated. Also worried about it being messed up. A work colleague known for her bluntness said "well it can't get much worse" so thats how bad it is. She was trying to be kind i think.

Sorry you're feeling this way, but maybe the hairdresser might relish the challenge? When I was a cleaner I loved it when the clients houses were a right filthy tip, because then they would really notice the difference after I'd been. Nobody sweats the small stuff. I put money on it that nobody else would describe you in such a negative way.


A hairdresser wouldn’t think such things, it’s their job to give you a nice haircut and make you feel good about yourself.

They'll have seen it a thousand times before, unless your hair is actually crawling or something.
You're probably quite a typical customer

How odd, I felt this exact way 2 weeks ago but I went to the hairdresser and I feel much better about myself now. I'm still overweight (and I mean atleast 12 stone) and have shit teeth but my hair looks good!

Solent my hair is long and thin. Horrible bleach blonde ends and grey roots. I call it the scary mary look.

@LEMtheoriginal As others have said, hairdressers are paid to do cuts and will have seen it all so I wouldn't worry at all. Def worth having a nice cut if you can.

I'm in desperate need of a haircut myself. Unfortunately I've been on IV meds for about three years and they've made my psoriasis flare up on my scalp. I've lost so much hair, my scalp is weeping and bleeding almost everywhere and it hurts to brush it. I'm far too embarrassed to go to the hair dressers but because the end are so thin and damaged now, it breaks even more when I brush it. My mum has given me the number of her (mobile) hairdresser and I'm going to try and brave her doing my hair.

Having a hair cut will make you feel better OP - can you ask a hairdresser to come to you?

Well, in all honesty that sounds like a common issue and nothing a good hairdresser can't easily sort with no judgement at all. Outgrown colour and thin hair isn't gross. I would encourage you to get a trained professional (You could discuss your worries over the phone before hand, my stylist is fantastic with people who have anxiety issues) but if you must cut it yourself, there are video tutorials on YouTube. Good luckx

I just dont even know where to start. I haven't had it cut professiobslly for at least 4 years possibly longer. Do i go somewhere expensive or are they only going to be used to someone who is pretty or somewhere more mumsy and local?

I had a horrible experience at a hair dressers once where dp paid as a surprise they were young girls and very giggly . I felt they were laughing at me. I think i have been once since then and paid £££ just for a trim that no one even noticed i had . So you can see why i feel nervous.

Hairdresser that comes to you? Maybe ask on a local Facebook page for recommendations for someone who is understanding for people is a similar situation (I’m sure you’re not the only one). And if you’re too uncomfortable to make that post you could message one of the admins and ask them to anonymously post it for you, and if you’re not on Facebook do you have a friend or family member who is, that would do it for you?

Maybe little small changes will start to help you feel better about yourself.

Nobody- that does sound horrible for you. It isn't your fault though. Sadly mine is self neglect

Definitely ask for local recommendations and talk on the phone first -I think a mobile hairdresser would be perfect for you. No big salon, no other clients...You can relax.

Would you feel comfortable talking to a stylist on the phone first and explaining you feel a bit self conscious about your hair? Then how they reassure you might help you choose someone you trust and feel comfortable with.

I've a thread on here about my hair from the start of the year. I ended up hiding it because I found even doing the thread upsetting (not because of what anyone said!) my hair was matted solidly to my head and hadn't been washed or brushed properly in over five years despite being in hospital during that time, and I struggle with hygiene as well.

I had a horrendous experience where I was made fun of and put on Facebook locally where people mocked me. I am forever grateful to the person who got it taken down and the business closed soon after. When a child my parents would force me to have it all shaved off as I didn't deserve hair. So my hairdresser experiences were horrendous.

I totally get it.

In the end I got someone to wash and cut it for me. It took many months of emailing and phoning to find someone who I was comfy to meet with and who would literally just meet with me to discuss it and my needs to be 100% that they were happy to do it.

They were very very kind and I sent them a card to say Thankyou. They didn't understand how important their kindness was, still don't but they really helped me. I've not been back I'm too scared but they understand. They see me every now and then and have invited me for a cup of tea and chat.

So people do exist who can help and don't judge but it takes time and, strength to find them.

LEM please don't feel that everyone is laughing at you, those girls were probably just giggly anyway and self centred. Get a recommendation of someone who is gentle and go at a quiet time ( first thing is a quiet time) or mobile like suggested by pp. You're as good as anyone else. A new haircut will make you feel so good. When you're feeling so good with your new hair, try and get out and treat yourself to some nice toiletries and have a you day where you work even further on recognising that you are a strong, beautiful woman.

Perhaps make the hair appointment the starting point for self-improvement - to make yourself feel better?
A short, Pixie cut + subtle colour would solve both current issues.
Dental appointment + Hygienist.
Literally hundreds of ideas to lose weight. Can depend on finances. Join gym. Healthy eating. C25K. Trawl internet for ideas you'd be comfortable with.

I used to go to Supercuts , I cannot book appointments , it has to be when I'm in the right frame of mind and when my scalp behaves.

I have actually walked out when one hairdresser was an utter cow to my DD (she was an utter cow to her previous client so it was her not me)

But Supercuts tends to be noisy , music on.

We went (DD and I) to a local salon that I'd always thought was too trendy (I'm 52 , DD is 16 and wants the trendy ones)
It was lovely , not rushed , not disco level music , hairdresser asked what I wanted , what I did to my hair to gauge what would work for me .

Get yourself some deep conditioner to begin with, wrap your head in clingfilm when you're indoors. That'll improve things .

Then book your appointment.

Hi LEM, do some treatments at home.pop into boots,Superdrug
You are a customer hairdresser should treat you well,can you get a recommendation