Too embarrassed for hairdresser

[LEMtheoriginal]

My hair desperate needs cutting but im too embarrased to go to the hair dresser.

Can anyone give tips for cutting myself?

Ask your friends who is nice and friendly and not a giggly teenager. But don't worry, hairdressers have seen everything. Wash your hair the day before, so it's a nice as you can make it, then ask the hairdresser for their advice. Most love a project!

Why don't you look for a mobile hairdresser in your area?

Past that, look for a small, privately owned, little hairdressers, make an appt for their least busy time. Like a tues day morning,

Honestly they will love doing a transformation, and will not think negatively about you.

I get really bad psoriasis on my scalp so sometimes it is awful when I have to get my haircut. I found a lovely mobile hairdresser, who couldn't care less. That might be better for you, you could also warn him or her in advance you haven't been for a while. Ask for recommendations on your local FB page. Just think they have nits and all sorts to deal with., if you are worried about your teeth, suck a mint or use mouthwash.

I have my leg in a cast. My hairdresser very kindly came to my house and dyed my hair. I had to kneel on the floor in front of the bath tub to rinse my hair. Trust me, they've seen all sorts!

Maybe don't go to a fancy place if you are feeling apprehensive? A nice little neighbourhood place would be good.

LEM

I do get where you're coming from. I think getting a specific hairdresser who has reviews for being both sympathetic and good is important.

Unfortunately I don't have the experience of some posters here with hairdressers. Some wonderful of course - relish the challenge, professional etc.

Some have been careless (bad fringe nightmare), rude (judging, snipy comments for a few split ends), or downright callous and stupid (telling me the excema on my head was down to me 'not rinsing out conditioner properly' - yes, that definitely causes weeping sores annually on one part of my head!). Some of them frankly DO think having well cared for hair is the be all and end all, and bitchily judge those who don't.

Sorry you’ve had a bad experience. Could you start off at a local salon aimed at more mature clients? You shouldn’t have to but it might reassure you a bit.

No decent salon will care about your teeth or weight though and even if your hair is a disaster they’ll relish the chance to transform it.

I get what you mean. The right person makes a huge difference.

I’m not mad keen on having my hair done, my friend did it and I felt a bit vulnerable TBH, I have autism and sensory issues and normally cut it myself but now she’s done it a couple of times I’m used to it.

If I can go to the dentist then you can go to the hairdresser. I went for the first time in 11 years the other week, I’ve had free treatment due to maternity and it literally took me until my exemption certificate was 6 weeks from expiring to get the courage up to go. But I did and I feel amazing for it. My teeth are awful but he was lovely and just matter of fact about what needs doing, didn’t have a go at me or laugh or any of the things I was terrified of. I actually feel like when the work needed is done (not nearly as much as I feared) I will actually be happy to have regular check ups and finally look after myself.

You can do it. You deserve nice hair. Xx

I really feel for you OP. It's an awful way to feel about yourself, but having that haircut could be a great step towards better self care.
It sounds like your confidence has taken quite a knock and I know for me that a fresh haircut makes me feel so much better.

I'd recommend having a really nice soak in the bath and dress in your favourite clothes, nice perfume on etc so you feel as good as you can before the hairdresser arrives (if you choose mobile!).
A shower makes all the difference for me and a nice clean outfit. While I know I don't really look better I feel much better!

All the best OP!

Honestly OP as long as you’re clean with clean clothes and you have fresh, clean hair then you’ll be absolutely fine.

I would look for a local salon that does OAP discounts (not saying you are an OAP, or need OAP appointments!) If they deal with older clients on a regular basis it will ensure the music won’t be horrendously loud and they will be used to clients that need a little extra time so won’t rush you. You’re also more likely to get slightly older and more sensible stylists.

Or a local mobile hairdresser, you can normally find them advertising on the internet so can do some research about who you think would suit you best.

I go to a local salon and have had different hairdressers each time and all have been nice. I hadn't washed my hair for ages before I went in and apologised and the hairdresser just shrugged it off. The time before that I hadn't brushed it but they didn't care. So much nicer than top named salons who think they're all above everyone. And the clients are all shapes and sizes, old, young, fat, thin, pretty, not so much, great hair, not so great. You'll feel so much better once you sit in the hd chair. Could you get someone to ring around for you and explain your situation so they could screen out places that sound like they're not for you?

Do not attempt to cut your own hair unless you are a hairdresser! you will end up looking so much worse, just DONT, visit your hairdresser please. She will not be criss, sad or angry with you.

What about a mobile hairdresser who will come to your home

I agree with the suggestion to get a hairdresser to come to you and tell her you've neglected yourself a bit lately so you need to start treating yourself. That will remove the need for any inclination to apologise.

I worked in a hairdressers about 30 years ago! just washing hair and putting out new towels and answering phones. I never cared what anybody weighed. I think there was one man with dandruff so bad the flakes were as big as pennies. That is the only thing I can remember that made me think 'whoah' and I was 16 and probably a harsh critic.

Hairdressers are trained to deal with all kinds of hair and customers. You could even mention when you book that youve not been well etc. Most hairdressers love people and want to make them comfortable and feel good. I hope you find a nice one xx

Mobile hairdresser for sure!

www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-40887208
Remember this story from a while ago.

I'd google local salons and look at reviews, see if they have a website with photos of the hairdressers so you can pick one you think looks less scary.

I have anexiety too I did a mobile hairdresser much less stressful. I’d ask on a local FB page for recommendations. I found an amazing woman who did mine she also had anexiety lol Be brave it’s easier once it’s done x

This time last year my very thick hair hadn’t been cut for 2 years. I finally bit the bullet and contacted a mobile hairdresser who kept popping up as recommended when people ask on Facebook groups. She was amazing. Took her 4 hours to cut it but she did it beautifully and now I see her every 6 weeks or so and it looks fab. Just do it!

Find somewhere friendly - you'll be able to tell straight away. Make an appointment and treat yourself. You'll be amazed how good you feel afterwards. It'll give you so much confidence, maybe enough to tell that bitch colleague to fuck off!

You deserve to feel better about yourself OP. I hope you find a lovely friendly mobile hairdresser who will enjoy bringing your hair to new life.

I think getting a haircut will be a great starting point to feeling better about yourself. I found a really great salon that I might not have been brave enough to try on account of it being very trendy. What sealed it for me was that when I went in for a price list 2 of the very young and trendy staff came and made a big fuss of my daughter who was about 3 at that time. When I was in the salon I also saw them doing the hair of a 90 year old lady who they had been to collect from her home. She was a regular there and was obviously made to feel very welcome as was I. Appearances can be deceptive - you have the right to exist and to occupy your space in life. If I was a hairdresser I would love the opportunity to transform someone and make them feel amazing about themselves. How fulfilling would that be?

I'd get someone to come to your house - if you are able (or ask a friend to help) why not colour it yourself beforehand, say a mid brown

As a hairdresser i can honestly say you dont need to worry, iv never looked at somebodies teeth or anything else thats not there hair ... i see every client in as a project. I have to do what they ask to do with there hair or recommend something i think would suit if they are not sure. after all you are paying them to do a job for you? ... at worst they may tell you that you need to get the chop more regular to keep up condition and recommend something for you to give you some umph

I would start with an old fashion high street/ village hair dressers if your nervous about young bitchy trainees (unfortunately alot of trendy places have them)

OR even better

look at your local mobile hair dressers? I go to peoples houses, and id say half of the reason people prefer to do it in the comfort of there own home is because they dont want to stair at a mirror for an hour straight, they dont like people looking at them or they're just very shy and nervy people!!

hope this helps

If an individual can give you an account of substance misuse and protest a Denial they don’t warrant an Airway, Breathing, Circulation, Disability, and Exposure assessment
As they are clearly breathing and receptive,are processing & responding

The assessment youre quoting is for critically ill or significant deterioration.

It isn’t routinely used to elicit a clinical history or drug misuse

Apologies posted this response on wrong thread