Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed by '2 weeks premature'

290 replies

FlockOfTwats · 05/02/2014 02:05

Fuck it. I know i'm being unreasonable. I know i'm being pedantic to the level of being a complete arsehole.

But it REALLY annoys me when people describe their baby as 2 weeks PREMATURE when they are born at 38 weeks.

37 - 42 weeks is full term.
YOUR BABY WAS NOT FUCKING PREMATURE.

Go ahead. Tell me i'm being unreasonable. I know i deserve it and need slapping down off my soapbox.

OP posts:
RoseRedder · 05/02/2014 02:08

yeah your being cuntdick

Original poster
FlockOfTwats · 05/02/2014 02:09

Can i steal cuntdick if i stop being one?

OP posts:
RoseRedder · 05/02/2014 02:09

my ds was earlier i think by about a week but that was early not premature

CouthyMow · 05/02/2014 02:13

15 years ago, anything before 40 weeks was seen as 'preemie'. So those that had their first DC then or before would probably STILL class anything before their due date as 'premature', because usually it is hard to change your mindset away from what you were told / taught / read with your first DC.

With DS3's pg, I was Confused at first that you weren't classed as premature unless you were born before 37 weeks, and you weren't meant to wean until 6 months.

Jury's still out on that one - out of my sample of 4 DC 's, the only one weaned at 6 months (weaning advice was far earlier with older 3 DC's, large gap to DC4) is the only one with life threatening food allergies...

Probably coincidental, but I often wonder...

Original poster
FlockOfTwats · 05/02/2014 02:14

That's how i say it Redder.

My first two were 34 weeks. They were 6 weeks premature.

My third was 37 weeks. He was 3 weeks early. Not premature.

OP posts:
olidusUrsus · 05/02/2014 02:15

Nope, YANBU. At all. Gets right on my tits. A lot of people don't seem to realise the short and longterm implications of having a premature baby though.

Original poster
FlockOfTwats · 05/02/2014 02:16

Couthy - These are people my age and younger (I am 23). I don't think i've ever spoken to anyone older than me about it. I don't know any older people who have had babies before their due date, except my friends mum who had my friend at 28 weeks.

OP posts:
Original poster
FlockOfTwats · 05/02/2014 02:20

Perhaps more reasonable, Another preemie related annoyance. 'I know how you feel, my DC was 10 days premature'.

The night i was discharged without my baby who was in neonatal. Who i'd spent the last 5 days watching tubes being put in and out of him and lines shoved into him, lumbar punctures.

I would not say i know how a mum of say a 28 weeker feels. Why do people say these things?

OP posts:
CouthyMow · 05/02/2014 02:25

I have no clue. My DD was born at 34+5, and was in SCBU. I was lucky, I can't imagine how much harder it would be to have a baby in NICU, and I wouldn't begin to try!

olidusUrsus · 05/02/2014 02:26

People are stupid. They try to be comforting but it just ends up hurting your feelings because people who haven't delivered premature babies just don't have the experience to empathise with. It's like when a premature newborn is in NICU and someone pipes up "don't worry, my brother's friend's dog knew someone who had a premature baby and now he's 6 foot 6 and plays national rugby".

SchroSawMargeryDaw · 05/02/2014 02:48

My DS1 was 2 weeks early and my DS2 was 5 weeks premature. I always thought that because 37 weeks is considered term, he would be classed as 2 weeks premature but everyone that I spoke to in the hospital was adamant that before 40 weeks is classed as premature and therefore, he was 5 weeks preemie.

It might be that people use this phrase due to misinformation rather than ignorance.

Andypipkin · 05/02/2014 02:57

Yes, 2 weeks premature is not accurate, but as 37 weeks is classed as term why do you class your 37 weeker as early?

SchroSawMargeryDaw · 05/02/2014 03:02

Who, me? My first was a 38 weeker (induction) I would only class him as early as he obviously wasn't ready to come yet and even at that it's only because HVs constantly talked about him being "early".

I just don't understand how my 35 weeker can be classed as 5 weeks premature when term is 37 weeks and 37 weeks is not classed as premature at all...

Original poster
FlockOfTwats · 05/02/2014 03:43

Andy Early and premature are two different things. Early is 'earlier than expect'. In this case 'expected date of delivery'. Premature is 'too early'.

Saying 2 weeks early does not bother me. It's the word premature that bothers me.

couthy My eldest didn't go to SCBU at all and i'm with you, I'd have never have claimed to have known how hard it was.

My Second was in NICU for 5 days, HDU for 4 days and then SCBU until he came home. I used to sit and cry for the mums with the micro preemies. I can't imagine how they felt.

Schro Lol, early doesn't bother me as i said. Early is correct. (I told you i was being pedantic to the level of being an arse). I have always wondered that the same though. This is my thinking, I hope this makes sense. I haven't worked out where you fit in inductions.

I think it is because when a baby is born between 37 and 42 that is it's term.

When a baby is born prematurely, They correct the age based on the average term, Because they don't know at what gestation it would have been born at had whatever caused it to be born prematurely not happened, So they work off the average gestation, which is 40 weeks.

OP posts:
Devilforasideboard · 05/02/2014 03:46

DS was born at 36 weeks but it feels weird saying premature as he was so healthy so I just say he was early. I think there's sometimes a tendency for some people to want to over-dramatise these things while those who actually had genuine problems downplay them. It's almost like they want to be part of what they see as a special 'club'.

Original poster
FlockOfTwats · 05/02/2014 03:51

devil I get where you're coming from, Even though my first two were both born at bang on 34 weeks, It seems weird to think of them both as preemies me because my eldest wasn't like my second.

Eldest was born, checked over, she was breathing normally and we were put onto a not post natal ward for observation to make sure she was keeping her temperature regulated and we were allowed to go home when she started putting weight on at 5 days.

I think it set me up for a shock with my second actually. I wasn't nearly as worried when my water broke at 33+6 the second time. I assumed he would be the same i think. It was such a shock when they took him away.

OP posts:
Original poster
FlockOfTwats · 05/02/2014 03:51

Onto a normal post natal ward that should say

OP posts:
tracypenisbeaker · 05/02/2014 03:58

So my baby came at 42 weeks, does that mean he wasnt 2 weeks overdue? i.e past his due date? Genuine question, btw.

Andypipkin · 05/02/2014 04:02

As all women have different cycles maybe 37 weeks wasn't early after all? I never went beyond 37 weeks either.... Thankfully because they were enormous! Shock

Bodicea · 05/02/2014 04:08

My baby was two weeks early, ( poss three as due date was already out in my opinion), I don't use the word premature. But it is just a word at the end of the day. Perhaps people like to use it as sounds more dramatic.
However can understand your annoyance as you had a tough time of it.

Bodicea · 05/02/2014 04:11

Tracey yes he was two weeks overdue assuming due date was correct.

Original poster
FlockOfTwats · 05/02/2014 04:20

tracy - Overdue is just used to describe being over your expected due date really. Technically anything between 37 and 42 weeks is 'on time' ie full term. over 42 weeks is post-term.

Andy Well, yeah 37 weeks isn't really 'an early baby' its 'earlier than expected' because you're expected to give birth at 40 weeks. Thats only because thats the average gestation within the 'normal' time frame for a humans pregnancy. If that makes sense. It feels right in my head!

I really have no idea why i like being so technical and pedantic about this. I am such a sad case lol.

I'm quite happy with my 37 weeker. He was 6lb12 so at a half pound a week gain would have been a good 8 and a half lb. Not huge but a big step up from 4lb9 (My elder two both weighed the same lol, consultant said i should have put a bet on it).

Just the extra two lb made a difference to me when i was giving birth!

I later concluded that you women who have anything bigger have wombs and fannies of steel or something. I thought i was dying and he was only little!

OP posts:
Grokette · 05/02/2014 04:31

Yeah, YANBU. MY twins got to 32 weeks and were in NICU for 5 weeks, then SCBU for one week before they got home. It was horrific, and if someone was to come along and talk about how traumatic it is to have a 36-37 weeker, I would be probably not be engaging in that conversation much longer.

That being said, I thought we were having a hard time in NICU, but there were other babies in there who were so very much sicker than mine. I very quickly learned to shut my mouth about my problems. I still remember hearing a woman talking on her phone about her 26 week old boy who later passed away. Put my shit in perspective, that did.

nooka · 05/02/2014 04:34

Both my children were 10 days early. I was very surprised with ds because me and my sisters were 10 days late so I was somehow expecting the same. My mother reminded me that my brother was two weeks early and in any case I've no idea if such things are genetic or not. My brother was born in the 60s and has never been referred to as premature, in my mind that really means 'too early' (the dictionary definition of the word too) babies who need support because they aren't really ready to be born.

Jengnr · 05/02/2014 04:45

They correct the age of a 37 weeker too. I have one.

Swipe left for the next trending thread