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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBu ......I probably am but I'm angry

109 replies

CreamolaFoamless · 16/12/2011 18:28

Eldest son;s girlfriend is living here .

She put £35 in to my bank account this month because £5 was apparently deducted (according to my son) because I didn't get her shopping one week

I did get her shopping

I'm livid and want to tell them both just 'fuck of and fend for yourselves'

OP posts:
GypsyMoth · 16/12/2011 18:30

Only £40 a monthShock

Why are you letting them take of advantage of you?

Hassledge · 16/12/2011 18:31

So she should pay £40 and that should cover food for one person for a month? Is that right? Does it?

valiumredhead · 16/12/2011 18:31

Do they work?

Plonker · 16/12/2011 18:32

How old are they?

coppertop · 16/12/2011 18:32

If they're old enough to be living together then they're old enough to do their own shopping.

TheThingUpstairs · 16/12/2011 18:32

You could suggest they get their own shopping and see how far £5 a week gets them. Does she pay rent also?

GypsyMoth · 16/12/2011 18:33

Is that for one or two people?

What about gas/elec/rent/water/c.tax?

AgentZigzag · 16/12/2011 18:33

She should have talked about it before deducting any cash, the cheeky mare.

You're doing them a favour, they should be made aware of it.

Feminine · 16/12/2011 18:34

Funny situation...

How did this come about?

YANBU ...

3littlefrogs · 16/12/2011 18:34

I would be livid and would be showing her the door. But I am wondering what the background to this is.

sitandnatter · 16/12/2011 18:34

Gobsmacked!!!! You get her shopping? Get her own shopping and pay you board for living in your home, using your electricity, heating etc.

Cheeky mare!!!

TroublesomeEx · 16/12/2011 18:34

Sorry OP, I think you've made a mistake. Surely she gives you £40 per week. Minimum?

inmysparetime · 16/12/2011 18:39

You could try only getting £5 worth of the shopping she asks for, and if she needs more she can buy it herself!
YABU to let them take advantage of you like that, £40 a month is a joke, that wasn't even market rents 30 years ago.
Show them your household budget so they appreciate what they can get in RL with £40.
Failing that, keep all the bog roll in your room, and take it with you when you need it. When the greedy mare asks where it is, say you've withheld it as she hadn't contributed to sanitary productsGrin.

fedupofnamechanging · 16/12/2011 18:39

The time has come for you to tell her to fuck off move out.

She thinks she is so entitled to have you do her shopping, that she considers it okay to deduct money if it's not done to her standards? I am Shock. What are you, staff?

If you are not prepared to turf her out on her arse, then you need to be increasing rent to market rates, and telling them to do their own shopping/cooking/cleaning. Don't let her take the piss any more.

Original poster
CreamolaFoamless · 16/12/2011 18:43

No the arrangement was £40 a month (she has been here for four 4 months and this is the second payment and she's short)

I feel like an evil step mother but she and my son have just royally pissed me off with this one

They are both 18 , he's a student she is unemployed

OP posts:
MyRealName · 16/12/2011 18:45
Shock

Sounds like it's about time they find out how good they've had it up until now.

What was the disputed shopping?

Groovee · 16/12/2011 18:45

So she's living with you for £10 a week roughly. She's taking the pee. She needs to get out and find a job or help more round the house and buy her own food.

LizzieChickens · 16/12/2011 18:46

I have to agree with everyone else. Show them how much it costs for your rent, electricity, for all the bills, for all the shopping, and then divide it by three. Ask for their two-thirds.

The shock might be enough to shake them into paying much more than they are right now.

Newtothisstuff · 16/12/2011 18:46

Jesus !! I might be 31 but can I come live with you too Wink seriously she needs to get a grip you are being taken advantage of

StewieGriffinsMom · 16/12/2011 18:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

glenthebattleostrich · 16/12/2011 18:47

So since she is unemployed and living in your house for an insultingly low amount I take it she is doing the majority of the cooking and cleaning. If not, she needs to be sent packing.

Trills · 16/12/2011 18:47

YABU to be letting her stay with your for that little. HTH

MudAndGlitter · 16/12/2011 18:47

YANBU!!

inmysparetime · 16/12/2011 18:48

If she's unemployed, why can she not find time to do the shopping?

PreviouslyonLost · 16/12/2011 18:48

Circa 1991, I was paying £45 a week to live at home...you do the inflation calculation in the intervening years. (Notwithstanding I was a blood relative too!)

Massive put upon festive hissy fit on the horizon I feel...

Go on, you deserve it. YANBU Xmas Smile