On a mission to moderate or absolutely abstaining - new thread for summer 2024

[Bigbus]

@amdone123 @touty @coppergate7 @swannyb
@Hohofortherobbers @YoghurtPotWashingMachine @Mj20 @Freezingfeetwarmheart @Needtokickthehabit @OhShitImNearly40 @Nowstrong @enoughisenough4

The last thread got full before a new one could be started. I’ve tried to tag some of the regular posters but I don’t really know what I’m doing! Let me know if this works and please tag people I’ve missed.

Well done @tahinitoast you are doing brilliantly.

I'm enjoying reading these posts about alcohol being a poison and the benefits of not drinking/moderating at the right time, as I'm about to head to the pub. Going to get a lime and soda to start off with as we'll be there a while!

Oh I'm a bit annoyed with myself, I'm at 14.2 units, so just over. But all in one day (worse!) coz I had a couple of shots. I NEVER have shots, VERY rarely, but coz someone mentioned one they had that my dad used to drink (i lost my dad 15 years ago) I had one and then another. Honestly, any excuse 🤣. Oh well, it could have been worse if I had drank other days this week. But you know what, I've had a nice afternoon and will stop drinking now, so hopefully will feel ok in the morning if not a bit tired. Lots of water between now and bedtime!

@Flumpywoo we're in the same boat. I've had 3 glasses of wine ( a really good excuse though), but I've stopped now. Had tea and water the past couple of hours. No cigarettes and no going out for more, so a success for me.
I'm sure you'll feel OK in the morning - better than if you'd carried on !

Thanks for the solidarity. Watching the football in bed with water to hydrate myself. Fingers crossed for a clear head in the morning!

@Amdone123 what topic is the thread under please (8 weeks accountability ) . So sorry i can't find it.

@mumzof4x it's in Weight Loss Chat.

Good Morning/Evening everyone and thanks again for your kind words. Am loving this thread and seeing I am not the only one who is trying to moderate or give up alcohol.

@Flumpywoo thank you, I am so pleased with myself!
@mumzof4x have a fantastic week, I too would love to lose a stone, so good luck with that.
@tahinitoast a welcome from me too to this excellent supportive thread. Well done on the last two weeks, you are doing so well.
@Peridot1 so good to see you here. I must return to the beauty products thread, have just had a month in France and may have returned with the odd thing (or 12)😂 My DH loves wine as much as I do and we are both as bad as each other at resisting temptation.
@Amdone123 hope the weather was kind to you. We are in winter here but are having some lovely sunny breezy days - perfect for the washing.
@Nowstrong I hope your Sunday went well with your sister. I am not good with visitors. Visitors like fish go off after three days has always been my way of thinking.

Sunday was unrecognisable to normal Sundays, I had one G&T and two single whisky - all measured properly so no large pours and that was it. The recycling people are going to wonder what happened when our bottle crate goes out this week and there are not numerous empty wine bottle.

Monday evening and I have had two single G&Ts and loving the moderation instead of my all or nothing way.

Apologies for this long ramble and I hope everyone has a good week.

@FiveShelties - if I went to France for a month I would come back with both beauty products and wine!

Sounds like you did well over the weekend.

I noticed yesterday that DH had put a bottle of white wine into the fridge for me assuming I would want some last night. I took it out. To his surprise. I had a g&t while cooking. Although I didn’t finish it. But then had quite a bit of red wine. But there is now no white wine in the fridge calling me this evening.

@Peridot1 If we still lived in UK we would have definitely returned with the odd case or three. I remember regularly doing the England/France ferry to load up the car. We absolutely did our best to support the Bordeaux region's economy whilst we were there, which probably has had more than a slight effect on my waistline.😁

Morning all, still hanging on here, not abstaining or moderating too well in the evening (lunch is easy, I'm driving all day). I really like what @FiveShelties said of visitors, well some of them anyway.
Yesterday was made of successful nightmare visits, they were content but of course, this or that could have been better. I think I also tired them out too much. Hey ho. I'm doing my best here.
Today will be more local and less strenuous for them, so perhaps will get it right.
However my tongue holding is being stretched to its absolute limits, so in a way how I'm not drinking more is a flipping miracle!
As of Friday I'll be AF for at least 7 days, so that will be good. Back to sport too.
Stay strong everyone, I'm reading the thread in my quiet just before bed time, you are all doing well and are inspiring.

Your visitors sound very frustrating @Nowstrong. I think you are doing very well in the circumstances.

@FiveShelties - I’m heading your way in February. We are already planning lots of winery visits!

Im feeling pretty good this morning as I managed to resist any wine last night. I had a clementine tonic water with ice and then just water. DH had a couple of alcohol free ciders and then two glasses of red that was left in an open bottle. I was tempted to have one but knew I’d just be annoyed with myself if I did so resisted.

@Peridot1 if I can help in any way with your visit, just give me a shout. Obviously I know nothing about wineries ---- honest😂

@Nowstrong you are really doing well, coping with your visitors and not drinking.

Tuesday night here and I have had two measures of whisky. I am just so pleased with myself. Out for lunch tomorrow at a small Brewery and Cidery am I may just have a small beer, rather than my usual wine. Take care everyone.

I done 15 days af and finally gave in, troubles at home and I caved in, 4 pints down and resisting more. Woke up this morning all positive yet when things go wrong I do what I do best and turn to a drink. I shouldn’t have bought them but I did and once bought I was drinking . Going to regret this so much tomorrow and shows me how vulnerable I am and what scares me. Tomorrow night will be the proper test as seal is broken and need to start all over again , done it once and can do it again . Just gutted I gave in

Morning! One positive my weight has dropped slightly, must be all this running around like a headless chicken serving endless cuppas et al. No time to nibble. So really looking forward to the huge weight loss (wishful thinking) as of Friday with being back to sport and AF. In fact, might give this evening an AF trial as feeling a bit "off" wine. Well! The WWs might be in for a shock.
@Jbob1976 don't worry, as you said, you did it once, you can do it again. And this time round you will be aware of the positive sides of being AF, an encouragement. I've been back to day 1, so many times I don't, or can't, count anymore. Just take advantage of the knowledge that you can do this again.
Going to be driving around all day again costing me an effing fortune in petrol so AF until this evening, then we shall see...
Hope you all have a good day. SSS! 💪

Hey don't best yourself up, you had a slip up and that's OK, the growth is in how you manage this as you say the test will be tomorrow night but you can do it 💪😘

@Jbob1976 one thing I find really useful is to count total days af not consecutive. So for example if you are af tonight then you can celebrate being 16 days af out of the last 17. It’s much more positive than counting only af days in a row because then once you’ve broken the streak you may be inclined to give up entirely. Also remember this thread is for moderation and not just for complete abstinence (although it’s also for people doing that too) so drinking is allowed. Please don’t be too hard on yourself, it’s a learning process.

@Jbob1976 I definitely agree with @Bigbus . In fact, I'd forgotten about that much more positive strategy @Bigbus - so thanks for the reminder.

@Jbob1976 you did 14 days which is brilliant. It was just a bump in the road. Yes, your challenge today is to not carry on drinking but to know you can do this. Keep posting. We'll help you.

I'm doing OK. Had 3 glasses Sunday ( sounds better than a bottle), but nothing this week - I appreciate it's only Wednesday, but still.
I've slept better, my skin is clearer, and I'm feeling lighter.
I also made a few minor cock ups at work but I accepted fault and moved on. Less anxiety due to being af.

@Nowstrong your posts make me laugh. I picture you running around ! I hope you're smiling through it all - it's better than screaming.

@FiveShelties you're doing really well. Hope the lunch went OK.

Have a great day, folks. I know the football mania can be tempting where alcohol is concerned but I honestly prefer watching tennis af. When I drank through matches, I missed most of it 🥴

Morning all, thank you @Bigbus @Amdone123 @Nowstrong @tahinitoast for you kind words and encouragement , definitely think counting at total days and not consecutive a great way to look at it. Woken up feeling groggy and with a headache. Im most annoyed as to why I drank, I drank because I felt I needed to in the situation I have at home, I just needed to “take that edge off and calm down” I think I will always will do as that’s me. Back on af train tonight, like everyone says I can draw on fact I can go af for 15 days and 3 weeks ago that was something I could only dream of. I do want to enjoy a drink going forward , last night was I didn’t. New day and I’m going to try and make it good one, I am so glad to have found this thread 😊 have a good day everyone

@Jbob1976 - as others have said don’t beat yourself up. Nobody manages to just stop first go. And you have done brilliantly. So today is a new day. And as @Bigbus says counting the AF days rather than the consecutive days is a great way to do it.

@FiveShelties - it’s a short trip of a week to Queenstown and then Christchurch with some friends one of whom lives in Christchurch. So lots of local knowledge. I’ll be in Australia for a month - not just flying all that way for a week by the way!

I managed another AF night last night. A bit harder than Monday as we bbq’d and I do love sitting drinking wine while DH bbqs. But I bought myself some AF mojito and had a glass of that. We then opened some AF red wine we had had for about a year. Yuck. Not worth it. DH had a glass of normal red and I just had water.

Feeling lighter but I’m sure that’s my imagination! Also struggled to get to sleep last night. But I know that will improve.

@Peridot1 well done for staying af during your bbq. That took some willpower. The thing to remember is that you don't always have to be af when bbq - ing, you're just not drinking every time. Yes, af wine is awful - there's a niche in the market for any budding entrepreneurs.
If you're cutting back drinking, I'll bet you feel lighter for that reason, whether bloat, less junk food or just calories from wine.

@Amdone123 yes, mostly with a smile on my face, am normally a very positive person, my sister just rubs me the wrong way with her "I'm always right" attitude and don't even ask about her opinion on poverty, politics, feminism, but that is a whole other thread, she, of course, is always right about those subjects too.
Family (well certain family members) are sometimes just complicated. My only birth family member still alive, no aunts, etc., so I still keep in contact and I'm her only blood family member, as she has no children. Do love her when she's gone home.
Oh well. Sorry about all that moaning. We all have our little challenges 🙄.
Still determined to remain AF until tomorrow morning, 'cos tomorrow is another day.
Well done @Peridot1 !

@Amdone123 - I think that’s my first time ever being AF while bbq-ing! It’s normally a great excuse to drink. Not that I usually need one mind you. I was pretty determined though. I really want to stay AF until Friday when I am going to an afternoon tea and will have some Prosecco.

Morning! Didn't succeed. Major stress situation yesterday (for me). It was decided (not by me) that my oven needed cleaning. Now I have a very used but modern Pyrolytic oven, I normally let it clean itself in the summer when I can leave it to it's own devices during the night with all the kitchen windows open. That was explained. Once I no longer had stressing visitors, I would let it pyrolyse itself, till death does grease part. However, it was unilaterally decided that my oven door would be unscrewed and lifted off to be cleaned and it would all be SO easy and then spick and span. Well.... my stress level was raising slowly. Everything went to plan until it was time to put the oven door back on. Clever BIL couldn't remember/work it out and I use my oven A LOT. 2 hours later when it was finally all put back together again by all the king's horses and all the king's men, Nowstrong had a drink again.
So no more "I'll be strong and nothing can go wrong", I'll just wait until tomorrow to get back into my stressless AF or practically, life again.
Going to rain, be stormy here, so goodness knows what they'll want me to clean today. You would think that I live in squalor. Promise I don't. I'm even quite fussy about how clean my little home is.
Enjoy your day. Send me strength.

Oh gosh @Nowstrong I think I would have hit someone! Hard. Or at least had very strong words. And a large drink!

I managed to stay AF yesterday. Pretty pleased with myself! DH had a couple of glasses of red but although I fleetingly thought it would be nice I knew it wouldn’t be nice enough to counteract the feeling of guilt I would have if I succumbed.

Took a while to get to sleep again so took a melatonin tablet. They are mild OTC ones from the US. Slept well.