Any one else feel like this but I dunno why my life has been just so hard lately for me and my 17 1/2 year old daughter. Last year I felt completely different, this year I feel burnt out and just bored and unmotivated. I have a guy who keeps coming in and out my life he works abroad so he isnt a stable presence but I feel stuck and dunno if any of you have similar life experience or advice as that would be so useful.
My daughter has not been to school since age 8. I chose not to keep her in school because of some of the things we encountered in her school such as staff pinning kids down in isolation rooms as a punishment and like harming "bad" kids by restraining them in the classroom, which I did not want my young daughter to see or felt was appropriate.
She has been home educated since then. At the minute she has 2 gcses, a 9 in Spanish and 8 in computing/ICT. Her maths and english skills are quite subpar to be honest. She is a good speller, yet struggles with reading long books and guessing the "intention" of authors which is what a lot of GCSE is about. Her maths is reasonable and probably key stage 3 level, not the best but GCSE math standards are so high these days. In the last year she has done a cookery course, several language courses, business administration basics and we were asked to do an art course which she bloody hates and has no artistic talent really but we are 3/5 of the way through that and she just cant think of ideas and hates it and obviously wishes she was doing something else. The obvious thing to do next is driving, but the theory test I dont quite know how to study for it seen as I havent driven since I was in my 20s cos we live in an urban area where we can bus walk everywhere. The other thing I struggle with is deciding on the gold DOFE program. She has done it for 18 months, did all sections and loved the volunteering element. Its done all bits except the Expedition, and honestly how is a weeks walking, eating garbage and carrying a 20kg bag up a mountain useful to the development of a young person? This isnt the 1940s. We originally did this with a dofe open award center. She attended 2 training days. On the first one she was assigned to a team of 5 other girls, all of whom were friends from that posh arse Hills Road college in Cambridge. They ignored and excluded my already friendless daughter and walked ahead. My daughter is 5ft 4 70kg and is not unfit, she does swimming and dance, but no way can she walk 20 miles a day like they suggested with a back breaking Army bergen. The idiots said the expedition was to take place in summer. Considering the heatwaves we have had its a recipe for sun stroke, burns and nausea. On the second day she asked whether she could have a parent see her at a particular point of the day or night as she is high anxiety and gets sick when away overnight from parents she can stay at nanas house without us but it seems being away at night without parents presence is traumatic for her. She went to mendip activity center last year and being away led to panic attacks and a drinking episode. They said no,okay, but I dont think they care about her needs. The food is another troubling element. They suggested eating those gross ration pack boil in a bag meals. My daughter wont eat them preferring fresh foods, and wouldnt eat any with meat in them due to concern of quality. She would have to handle bottle gas, flames, putting up a tent, no contact even a mobile phone with parents, possible injury, carrying own excrement, managing herself miles from anywhere at 17 YEARS OLD what is this SAS basic training? We had her walk 10ks every week, every time her feet would begin to blister and bleed she has size 3 feet for context with the bag on so I decided to leave that centre and look at these expensive private expeditions on canoes but she wont do that either. This has led to a lot of arguments with me and her dad who the dad says stop pushing and she has done enough already. The final issue is she obviously doesnt want to go to uni next year but she just cant think of what job/career to do and seems to have lost interest in anything. Sorry to rant but any help or suggestions would be appreciated.