Lighthearted one for you - I’ve offended someone with my dinner for this evening

[Helpmyarse]

A fellow school mum popped in to drop some things off for me to take up to the school (I volunteer Thursday afternoon).

While she was here, I got tonight’s dinner out of the oven. I always make something in a tray on Thursdays as it’s a busy day for everyone (me, dh, ds 23, dd 13 and dd 6). It’s a cluster fuck of afterschool clubs, dh working from the office, ds on a late shift. So it just makes sense to have something in a tray that everyone can help themselves to and eat at different times; it’s only me and the 6 year old here at our usual dinner time on a Thursday.

Today I made sausage and bean pie. Sausages cut up, mixed with beans, cheesy mash on top. Easier than sausage, mash and beans kept separately IMO, when people are grabbing dinner.

Lazy bitch, aren’t I? Stay at home mum as well, I should be standing in the kitchen whipping up a three course meal whenever anyone wants to eat.

Anyway, I got it out the oven and you should have seen her face. Appalled that I would feed my family cut up beans and sausages and that were weren’t all going to sit around the table to a freshly prepared meal (we would all have to wait until about 9pm on a Thursday to eat together at the table, sod that).

She would never feed her family this meal. I did ask, would she feed them sausage and mash. Yes, she said. So I asked what the difference was. “This isn’t fresh! You don’t work, you could have made it this evening.” okay, crazy lady.

Anyway, lighthearted as she’s a silly cow, but here’s a photo of the offending dinner that horrified her.

Imagine commenting on someone’s dinner prep 🤣 what a sad life.

Isn’t it funny. I would think you’ve got your shit together. I’m a SAHM and often still don’t know what’s for dinner at 4pm - the fact you’ve got yours done and dusted at 9.45pm really impresses me.

She would hate me flinging potato waffles in the air fryer at 6.45pm in a blind panic.

My son's dinner last night was toaster potato waffles and store bought meatballs. I am also a SAHM. I dread to think of what this nosy lady would think of that!

I don’t love it as a meal, because I reckon it would be a bit soggy after microwaving. I would do that when everyone was going to eat at the same time so it would be all crusty potato bits & stuff bubbling up round the edges!

For staggered eating I’d either do a slow cooker blipping away (maybe chilli, with tortillas & raid the fridge for salad) or a big tray bake that could be picked at warm or cold (chicken tikka, help yourself to chapattis & fridge salad).

But there’s nothing wrong with either cowboy pie or early dinner prep! Plus, she’s rude to comment anyway.

Looks fine to me. In fact I think I’ll copy it!!

I would have to start lecturing back. Tell her that mothers who don’t teach their children life skills, including effective time management, seriously fail their children. And ask if she really only does the bare minimum of cooking and cleaning and not the much harder parts of parenting that are so important for her children’s development. I’d have fun with it (maybe) and take on a self righteous tone, wring my hands, ask her if she is coping ok. Maybe remind her that social services are there to help if she is struggling.

Aside from the fact that I hate cheese the rest of it sounds delicious.

A family favourite used to be corned beef cottage pie. Basically corned beef cup up into squares with mash on top and grilled off . Served with beans or veg and gravy.

But surely everyone knows waffles go in the toaster!

As you burn heat the baked beans on the hob and fry the egg but break the yolk so your child refuses to eat it...

Sausage pie is a favourite in our house. My gran used to make it for all of us in the 80’s.
sausages cut up, beans, frozen veg and a bit of bisto topped with cheesey mustard mash. I make individual pies to freeze for mid week meals

It looks fab ( though I would only have the vegetarian version) ...only thing that would be missing would be a smiley face made from tomato ketchup on top of the mash ! Lovely !

I remember going to a friends house and her mum plating up that evening’s dinners but it was morning time. I can’t remember how the conversation went but I obviously asked why and she said basically what you have @Helpmyarse they can heat it up whenever they want etc - I remember thinking it was so cool and have often done it myself over the years 👍

My kids would wolf that down. I dont like beans but the sausages and cheesy mash would do just fine 😋

I'm struggling to believe that this happened as you describe. My guess is that she didn't say anything at all but you felt a bit self-conscious/judged and are therefore inviting people to slag the woman off to make yourself feel better. Happens on here all the time- people over-egging stories in order to get a particular response.

Going to cause chaos by saying

I like sausage mash and beans

But not all in a pie

I would want them separately

I wouldn’t care if they were cooked before and reheated though. That’s probs what I’d do.

I don't put water in. The time depends on how many(much?) you are cooking. Start with 1m for a small amount and work up from there. Loosely covered.

In your OP you said "what a sad life".
That doesn't sound like compassion.

People have always got something to say in your home haven’t they? I’ve started to realise that. Last night my MIL made a joke when she saw the suitcases in our hallway. Sorry we have only been home 10 days, is our mess offending you? Similar comments from adult child that doesn’t live at home. I want to scream ‘YOU INVITED YOURSELF!!’ I notice I’m not invited to their homes 😡

Your pie looks lovely and actually it only matters what your family think.

Are you joking? You'd have came back into the room to find me face down in that tray of absolute fucking deliciousness 😋

Looks fab, wish DS ate mash as I’d cook a lot more like this and WTF is the difference between that and Cottage Pie really?! Snobby bint.

I can see her concern, the 'fork lines' should be woven (see photo) or, at the very least, parallel.

If she witters on about her SAHM schedule, just say "Well XXX, some of us prefer to have a life." then leave it at that. Self-righteous arsehole.

For clarity, I was a SAHM when my kids were small and probably 0did all the stuff she does, but would never judge someone else on how they fed their family. As long as they're safe, fed and reasonably clean, that's a win in my book.

I do think Motherland has a lot to answer for. Everyone thinks they can write observational commentary. They can’t.