Have you ever smacked your child, given 2021 UK statistic?

[Tinkerbelle4]

Just seen this clip, not really a big fan is super nanny but was shocked to hear the UK 2021 statistic that 62% of parents had physically disciplined their child.

https://www.facebook.com/share/v/1HXeNmtEDB/?mibextid=wwXIfr

I’m curious- do you fall into that statistic? Especially if you have children say under 16- have you ever smacked them?

I haven't and am hoping that I never would. I remember every instance of being hit as a child (usually when my parent was overwhelmed), and it did make me question their love for me.

I saw two kids being smacked by their parents. It was horrible to see it and made me want to go over and smack the parents! I do believe it should be banned in England.

I don’t really buy into the notion that if you were smacked as a child, that you will be a parent who then smacks your own DCs. I was smacked when little. A lot. In fact I had bruises on my legs on many occasions and was smacked/hit up until I was 16/17. But it was common place at that time for many children to be smacked. When I became a mum, there was lots in the media about plans to ban smacking, and the emotional damage it caused. Before that it was just the norm and never challenged by anyone in authority. In fact we used to get the ‘slipper’ at school too. I never smacked mine because it was then becoming not the norm, and made me reflect on my own childhood and the impact smacking had on me.

No, my DC would howl with laughter if I suggested I was going to smack them for doing something wrong they knew I never would. My mum and dad never smacked and my mum practically threw her dad out of our house for threatening to smack my brother.

Absolutely not. But I do seriously think about ragdolling 14yo boy at least once a week for his cheek/shitty attitude/laziness/boginness /generally being a tramp..but i dont, I just smile, take the ps off him and tell him I was 14 before him, I know the tricks 🤣. Hes actually not too bad, great help in the house, we have our moments though.

I agree, I think most of us are more influenced by what we consider to be the norm for our own peer group.

Once. Can't remember why and it wasn't hard, a tap really. BUT I would say, because it was such an unexpected and unusual occurrence, it did the trick. DC stopped instantly, looked at me and said in a stunned voice 'You hit me!'

I never knew until I was on mumsnet that shouting wasn’t something you’re supposed to do. The first time I read someone saying that they felt bad because they shouted at their child when said child was hitting a sibling, I was confused. I see the point that it can be damaging to be constantly shouted at especially when the child hasn’t done anything but surely that’s different from someone who is only shouted at when they’re doing something they should know is very bad behaviour.

I know the parenting books say to do these gentle interventions but in reality they don’t work with all children.

To answer the question, no I don’t and have never hit. I’m in Scotland and forget it’s still legal and acceptable in other places. I had it happen to me as a child although my parents say it never happened. They have rose tinted glasses. I think some parents can be like that. As a child I noticed an inconsistency and it was really due to my parent’s mood. I remember being smacked once because I hadn’t yet done homework and it was near bedtime but other times I would actively have been naughty and wasn’t hit.

Talking about it doesn't mean admitting it.

You'll see a lot of people virtue signaling.

Not intentionally as a discipline tactic. I think I have technically a couple of times- like when a foot stood on my toes in a sandal kind of thing.

Any sort of physical intervention is open to abuse, of course. I think that often gets forgotten among the ‘smacking; how horrific!’ posts.

I find mumsnet doesn’t represent my experience in real life. Everyone I know irl has smacked their kids and is open about it. I remember saying I wouldn’t be smacking mine and I was laughed at by the people I know.

Wow! The road and dog situation I can just about get onboard with - perhaps. But copying Peppa Pig and showing off in front of pals - absolutely not. There’s better ways to discipline.

No, I’ve never smacked either of mine 18/15.

I was thinking this. Also where does a genuine tap, or batting a hand away become a smack?

One of my kids is prone to touching me in my private parts. I’ve asked him not to, but he still does it. When he does I have a genuine reflex to bat his hand away. I wouldn’t say I’ve smacked him, but maybe some would say I have?

If they bolt, you run over and grab them out of the middle of the road, pull them back onto the pavement, and then they fight you off, wrench their hand out of your grasp and run out into the road again shrieking with laughter not once but twice, you have to do something to shock them out of their hysterical game before they kill themselves. My friend had to smack her ds in that situation once. I was there too - he was incredibly strong, slippery as an eel and lightning fast. I couldn't catch him at all.

Pulling them back and saying don't do it again really doesn't cut the mustard. Before anyone says he should have had reins on, yes. He'd undone them. She was wrestling them back onto him when he shot off.

I usually tell mine (but fortunately seldom have to), if there was ever a time they needed a smack it would be right now! So I suppose they get the verbal smack rather than a physical one if needs be.

But lifting my hand to my child, no never, don’t think I’d ever forgive myself tbh.

I don’t understand how not hitting your child makes you holy or virtue signalling either.

No I have 4, all nearly adults, I never smacked any of them. It's illegal in Wales now anyway

Eh?

Ok, admitting it on the thread then.

Have you actually read it?

I don’t see how saying I’ve never smacked my children (which is the truth) is ‘virtue signalling’? Would it be better to lie and say that I have?

I actually thought no one smacked these days, bar my sister - whom I deem a sh*t mother tbh because of this.

never had or seen this. Sounds awful. I would pick up, wrap my arms around, block or similar and move away from the road. I wouldn’t hit them!!

Sad isn’t it 😔

My 6 foot then teenager stormed past me once with his hand raised and I thought he was going to hit me. (We never did work out why his hand was up).

I instinctively flailed my arm and smacked him across the head.

We then had a very formal conversation where we both apologised!

Never ever - I can't fathom ever choosing to hurt my child. If hitting women is wrong then why on earth do we justify hitting children - it is abuse, and I hope we come to see it as such here in England (and catch up with Scotland and Wales where it's illegal).

No - I pulled him back once hard when he almost ran into the road when he was about 3. And I hurt his arm. I felt awful for months. That’s it though, DS is 10.