Holiday mum keeps sending her son over to us repeatedly

[ItsPriya]

Currently on holiday - 2 week AI with husband and teenage daughter. Had a really busy year and was really looking forward to downtime and just recharging with the 3 of us.
On the second day was relaxing by the pool when a little boy about 4yo dropped his goggles near my lounger. Threw them into the pool for him, he threw them back and we had a little game of catch with them. Really sweet kid, thought no more of it.
Went to the buffet that night and the boy appeared at my feet as I was getting my food, started pulling at my arm, hanging off me whining "play with me" and asking me to go outside with him to play?!
My daughter came up to me and said she'd been passing his parents table and heard the mum say "he's whinging because hes tired, I told him to go play with that woman from earlier." Laughing and drinking while I'm trying to get my food and stop her kid from getting lost or hurt.
Went to sit down, said "I'm eating now, so go back to Mummy." Watched him go back over, his mum looked really annoyed, said something to him and he came back!
He said "my mum said I can sit with you until you're done then we can play."
Tried to eat but he was non stop, picking things up, touching things, whinging - not my child, why am I dealing with this?!
In the end DH walked him back over and firmly said we were trying to eat. Mum had the nerve to ask if our daughter had ever been a toddler.
Anyway, he harassed me at the entertainment that night to the point we left as I couldn't see his Mum so dropped him with the entertainment team. Makes DH very uncomfortable as he's very full on, climbing on our knees, wrapping his legs around us.
Breakfast this morning - he's actually waiting at the double doors and it was a repeat of the previous night. I actually suspect Mum is hiding from us.

What do I do?!

Absolutely this.

Holiday reps aren't really a thing any more and not there to help with cheeky fuckery. How does the OP know what firm the rough tribe has travelled with? A Jet2, easyjet or Tui rep is not going to be interested in customers of Love Holidays or On the Beach.

The last few times we've been away on this sort of break you perhaps see a rep at the airport directing you to a bus, and sometimes one will come on the coach to the hotel. And that's it. Contact - if you need it - is by WhatsApp or text message. (Which is actually better, as all the reps in the area take turns to answer queries and you don't have to hang around in reception between 11 and noon or whatever when they visit).

I knew a mother like this who thought nothing of letting her son go and bother other people. She insisted that everybody thought he was adorable. Even if those people were trying to have a quiet dinner in a nice restaurant. She was, and remains, a totally shit mother.

It is unsafe anyway. The child could fall into the pool or be hurt in any number of ways. What are the so called parents thinking?

Exactly . They may even have them evicted if they keep on deliberately abandoning their child .

She's 100% also the first mother to loudly complain that there's "no village" anymore the moment someone politely declines taking care of her kid.

Haven't read all replies here, but wondering if the man is actually the child's dad or a new boyfriend that the mum is more interested in than her son. Seems weird for parents to take a 4 year old on holiday and then ignore them.
How annoying for you, and it is harassment.
She's probably the type that sends her children to the neighbours at ungodly hours of the morning to 'play with their kids" too.

Reminds me of when I was a youngster and a girl from up the road befriended my sister ( they were both about 6) this girl used to stay around our house for hours on end. One day my mum had had enough and told her its time she went home. She replied that her mum and dad were at work and wouldnt be back till about 6pm!! (This was 50 odd years ago)

It's doubly abusive, isn't it, because a) the parent is neglecting their poor child and b) it's laying the child open to brusque rejection by strangers which could be damaging.

Not criticising people for telling such children to go away - I've done it myself - but it's sad that they should experience this because of their stupid parents.

How did last night go?

He's a small child and it's not his fault he has a shit mum. OP is presumably trying not to upset him, I'd have thought that was obvious.

Where are you AI holidaying for 2 weeks that a “rough” group of people can afford? Maybe pick better AI next time?

What are the chances your daughter was passing the group at the exact moment the mother made that comment! Weird that two grown adults can’t deal with returning a toddler to their parents.

@BoredZelda you can still have money and be rough AF. Our local coke dealer lived the life of riley until he was caught and put in jail. Luxury holidays, new cars but they were the roughest people you’d ever meet. Just rough and absolutely loaded

lol rough doesn’t always mean poor

Oh it is always the "it takes a village" types who are the biggest pisstakers, who also would not reciprocate the favour in a million years.

I really hope you and DD had a lovely evening and that the hotel staff were able to help/intercede. That poor little lad - especially as there will be babysitting services they can use and kids clubs too - the fact that they aren’t suggests that they were reserving the money they’ve saved by siccing the poor lamb on any unsuspecting fellow holiday maker to spend in the bar.

I need to add my story of this type of behaviour! Back when my eldest (now 28) was 2 we had a little holiday in Spain and for some reason this little boy and girl approx 3 and 5 kept wanting to play with my son, that was fine I was watching my baby anyway.

Then the little girl (3) slipped and banged her head on the tiled pool she was really crying so my partner at the time picked her up (times were different in the 90’s) and tried to find her parents after speaking to the older brother he led us back to his room and their parents were on the balcony sunbathing! Admittedly you could see the pool from their balcony but they didn’t notice she was crying very loudly and they were not even thankful we’d taken care of her hurt daughter !

all good advice except don't hold his hand when walking him off to find staff. But do be kind to him, but don't take this shit from the parents.

Quite! I had to explain this to a friend. She thought I was working with ‘posh” people, as she put it. I said “They’re rich - it’s not necessarily the same!”

We call these ‘pub kids’.

You’d always see these parents or a weekend dad drinking in the pub and letting their child wander around. These kids would be exposed to inappropriate conversations and behaviour and ignored by their parents. They’d be encouraged to approach other strange adults and be that desperate for interaction they’d often show no caution or fear.

No normal, healthy attachment to their parents and in need of affection leads to this behaviour. Their parents aren’t their safe space so they seek to fulfil that need elsewhere.

This situation has happened for donkey’s years, my 90 odd year old mum tells me of children in her village who’d be abandoned all day to be the responsibility of other adults and I remember a local girl and boy like this in the 80s.

Some people aren’t cut out to be parents, they’re just cunts.

How's it going now op ?

When children behave like this with strangers it often points to being ignored by parents. Poor little boy. It really sickens me.

Fuck that. That’s why I go adults only.

Good idea. Because it"'s true. You are nice but let's face it you could be anybody and.they are just letting.him be aroundvl you. They are v irresponsible. I'd complain to someone.

She sounds exactly like someone I know too. She does not care and I agree is a totally shit mum.