Holiday mum keeps sending her son over to us repeatedly

[ItsPriya]

Currently on holiday - 2 week AI with husband and teenage daughter. Had a really busy year and was really looking forward to downtime and just recharging with the 3 of us.
On the second day was relaxing by the pool when a little boy about 4yo dropped his goggles near my lounger. Threw them into the pool for him, he threw them back and we had a little game of catch with them. Really sweet kid, thought no more of it.
Went to the buffet that night and the boy appeared at my feet as I was getting my food, started pulling at my arm, hanging off me whining "play with me" and asking me to go outside with him to play?!
My daughter came up to me and said she'd been passing his parents table and heard the mum say "he's whinging because hes tired, I told him to go play with that woman from earlier." Laughing and drinking while I'm trying to get my food and stop her kid from getting lost or hurt.
Went to sit down, said "I'm eating now, so go back to Mummy." Watched him go back over, his mum looked really annoyed, said something to him and he came back!
He said "my mum said I can sit with you until you're done then we can play."
Tried to eat but he was non stop, picking things up, touching things, whinging - not my child, why am I dealing with this?!
In the end DH walked him back over and firmly said we were trying to eat. Mum had the nerve to ask if our daughter had ever been a toddler.
Anyway, he harassed me at the entertainment that night to the point we left as I couldn't see his Mum so dropped him with the entertainment team. Makes DH very uncomfortable as he's very full on, climbing on our knees, wrapping his legs around us.
Breakfast this morning - he's actually waiting at the double doors and it was a repeat of the previous night. I actually suspect Mum is hiding from us.

What do I do?!

I'd be taking good photos of them and sending the story to some rag like the daily mail.
Just the sort of story they like.
"Brits abandoning children at exclusive AI hotel and pissing off the guests"

This isn't like a group of older kids palling up on a beach and playing together. I feel so sorry for this poor little boy, but given what one of the group said to your husband, you need to find the manager, tell them what has been happening and make it clear that you are also concerned for hs safety.

This! The people telling you to not respond to a lonely child are not there, you are - and I (and probably most of the pp if actually there) would do the same. Fingers crossed for Wednesday and though I am sure you will, please don’t let your worries about the child intrude too much on the rest of your holiday. (I think most of us are worried about him)

I wondered when the first single child family asking post would rear its ugly head. So predictable.

absolutely - poor parenting doesn't relate to expenditure

Have you not read the thread? Many posters would and have sent kids away. I don't have a heart of stone but I don't pay money to go on holidays and mind other people's children, no matter how bad their parenting is.

Plus, like OP seems to understand now - that way leads trouble. Now it's implied that her husband is a predator, he's been told to fuck off, she's worried things will turn physically violent.

All that versus ignoring a kid you'll never see again? I know which I'm picking, especially since they have their own daughter with them.

Speak to management. This child is not your responsibility and he shouldn’t be intruding on your time with your family.
unfortunately, if it persists you will have to be very firm with the child and say you don’t want him to come and see you again.

This. I simply don’t understand why this has gone on for so long. The first time I was met with a rude comment from the mum on returning the boy I’d have made it plain that the next time she encouraged him to come over you would be taking him to the hotel manager and making a formal complaint. And DH needs to man up - he returned the child and was told to fuck off !! Not a chance I’d let them get away with that. I think I’d be telling them next time it happens I’ll insist that the hotel management call the police and tell them they’re deliberately putting their child at risk.

Good luck

What do you mean you wouldn't let them get away with telling you to fuck off? What do you suggest he should have done? Took a swing?

Well they dont seem particularly arsed about their offspring hanging around people they dont know!!!
Typical gormless chavs . Dump your brats on strangers then accuse them of being paedos

I said earlier that you needed to be careful Op and things are turning nasty now. His DM doesn't mind fobbing him off on you, she can tell you're a kind person so someone she can make use of but your DH should have no part of playing with or returning the boy. People like that may be stupid about their DC welfare but if crossed they can turn very badly, unlike you they won't think twice about lying to the authorities and trying to get your DH in trouble.

Some of these replies are wild.

OP, it is tricky. And in your position, I would probably do what you are doing, whilst also quietly being annoyed that I wasn’t getting any peace.

arent there any/many other kids around? if there were, I’d maybe use a bit of redirection. But the child obviously craves a bit of adult company.

I would also probably avoid any further confrontation with the group tbh, because these rarely end well and if they are well oiled then there is no rational way you can get a decent point across.

Yes, I have read the thread/ but you do you - and live with it

What do you mean, you wouldn't let them get away with it? You would have taken on a group of 8+, all drunk? While your 13 year old daughter watched from across the pool? Sure you would...

And he didn't return the child. The child was in the pool where I was sitting. He went to tell them we were leaving the pool and the child would be alone.

I’m with you. I’ve raised my own kids, I’m not interested in raising anyone else’s, especially on holiday. Sure, I’d feel sorry for the child, but it’s still not my responsibility. There’s a million kids in the world with crappy parents, I can’t save them all.

God no. I wouldn’t lower myself. But neither would I have allowed it to get to this stage. A formal complaint to the hotel manager, making it clear that the child is unsupervised around water and a tragedy waiting to happen. The OP and her DH are in a very risky position if anything happens to that child, and there have already been insinuations about DH being overly interested in him. At that point you have to protect yourself.

I wouldn't actually do it, but the teach you a lesson side of me thinks pretend to kidnap him so parents think twice in the future, hand him into the police as lost, anything so his mum thinks hes actually gone for a bit and see how she feels then!

I think you need to be careful here OP. If anything happens to the little boy, the mum will blame you because you are taking responsibility for him. Stop engaging. Its sad but you don’t know the child, his background or his home life. You are getting too caught up in it. He is clearly neglected so tell the hotel staff that, so they ensure that he can’t be in the pool by himself.

What a vile, disgusting thing to say. God, they do sound rough. Sorry, OP. 😢 Really hope they do leave soon.

Absolutely not OP. There’s no need for it to get physical. I’d have escalated this to the hotel management, told them exactly what was happening and made it clear that the boy was now on his own in the water and that his family weren’t capable of supervising him because they were drunk. It then becomes the hotel’s responsibility and from that point on, as hard as it is, you stop engaging with the boy.

You’re putting yourself and your DH at risk because if anything happens to him CF family will try to draw you into it - they’ve made that clear with the insinuations as to why your DH is so interested in the child. That shows you the mentality of the people you’re dealing with.

This is very sad, I feel sorry for the poor little boy.

There's no point expecting them to see the light because his family aren't confused or a bit naive, they are happy to leave a little boy on his own and neglect him.

So what do you do? Well you could stoop to their level and get really nasty but no matter how low you stoop, people like that can stoop even lower. So if it were me, I'd tell him that I'm sorry that he's alone on holiday and that it's not nice. And then I'd tell staff that there's an unsupervised child.

I wouldn't talk to his family any more as that will not help, people like that don't want kindness etc, they actually enjoy taking advantage of others and intimidating them.

I feel for you OP, lots of people are acting like it’s easy to take on a group of rough adults who obviously don’t give a shit. These situations are easy to deal with in theory but the reality is different. You were trying to be nice, you are a good person. They like really shitty people, that poor boy.

Oh wow his mothers got some front. I’m afraid I’d wait until he comes over again & id take his little hand & walk him back to his mummy & tell her in no uncertain terms that as gorgeous as HER son is he’s not your or anyone else’s responsibility so please entertain him yourself we are on a family holiday that means I’m not childminding your child whilst you get pissed

Honestly OP I would completely disengage at this point. Speak to management with your concerns and put it in writing too. Every time the little boy (bless him) comes up to you, go straight to a member of staff and mention your complaint. I wouldn't be speaking to the little boy or his family at all now.